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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Cutting down drinking in run up to birth?

115 replies

Greggers2017 · 23/05/2019 17:18

Hi ladies. I'm 36 weeks pregnant. When did your partners cut down their drinking when out with mates etc in the run up to birth? How many weeks were you?
I'm not wanting to be unreasonable but also getting nervous about the run up to the birth. Thanks

OP posts:
Morgan12 · 23/05/2019 17:21

36 weeks lol 😂

modgepodge · 23/05/2019 17:24

My partner didn’t get smashed after about 30 weeks. My sister asked her husband to stop completely from about 32 so he’d be able to drive her to the hospital if necessary - I figured worst case we’d get a cab. So my hubby carried on having a few beers or a couple of glasses of wine right up to our daughter being born.

AngelicInnocent · 23/05/2019 17:27

DH never had more than one from finding out i was pregnant tbh but he's never been a big drinker

ANewDawn10 · 23/05/2019 17:33

DH isnt a big drinker. Also we both are not big into socializing often. So he was pretty much there for me since day 1.

22Giraffes · 23/05/2019 17:34

My DP doesn't drink but I didn't particularly ask him to scale back any activities, just to be on hand to take me to hospital when the time came. Neither of us go out a lot though so maybe I'd of felt differently if he went on regular nights out.

Slicedpineapple · 23/05/2019 17:35

Well I'm 36 weeks now and whilst he would still have a social drink with friends e.g. with a meal or a stop off at the pub, I don't think he would actually go out with friends at this point. I'm tired, achey, swollen, and feeling a bit useless so I just couldn't see him thinking it was a fair suggestion.

herculepoirot2 · 23/05/2019 17:35

37 weeks, he made sure he was under the limit. Except for one occasion when he had two pints, I think. But as I was in pre-labour for about four days in the end, he could have been drunk as a lord and sobered up in time to drive us to the hospital. Failing that, I would have got a taxi. Don’t stress!

Slicedpineapple · 23/05/2019 17:37

What made me laugh was the fact he has been invited on a night out about a week after my due date! Thankfully he shot that down very quickly.

RickJames · 23/05/2019 17:38

It wasn't an issue for us as DH didn't drink much as a rule. I would say it would be good to wind it down anyway as you all need to get used to having a baby that needs 24 hour care! Apart from wetting the baby's head.. but other than that, babies and drinking don't really go together.

Handsoffmysweets · 23/05/2019 17:40

This reply has been withdrawn

This has been withdrawn by MNHQ at the poster's request.

Greggers2017 · 23/05/2019 17:42

Thanks for the replies. I'm not going to ask him to stop or not socialise just thinking of when he should no longer get drunk. Say no more than 4 pints.
It's my third baby, the older twos dad didn't drink at all in the run up to birth but he wasn't really one for going out. My problem with him was dragging him away from overtime at work. 🤣

OP posts:
kidsmakesomuchwashing · 23/05/2019 17:43

Erm don't think he ever did....

Purpleartichoke · 23/05/2019 17:44

My husband didn’t have a single drink while I was pregnant. It was a complicated pregnancy with frequent hospital trips so that was a factor. I think it also depends on if you live somewhere with alternate transport. My only options for getting to the hospital would have been personal car or ambulance.

mindutopia · 23/05/2019 17:45

Mine didn’t go away drinking anywhere from 35 weeks. My first was born at 37 weeks and closest really good friends live 1.5 hours away, so he always goes for an overnight and wouldn’t easily be able to get back if drinking, obviously. He didn’t have more than like a drink after 37 weeks and none at all really the last couple weeks.

kaytee87 · 23/05/2019 17:46

36 weeks, I'm not sure I'd be as nervous second time.

Slicedpineapple · 23/05/2019 17:49

handsoffmysweets I've not had the easiest of pregnancies and would be pretty pissed if he went for a night out whilst we had a 1 week old baby - maybe younger - and I was recovering from birth.
As I've been doing the hard work (so to speak) for 9 months, I really don't think a husband rushing for a night out would be fair. He agrees with me (without me even having to say it, so we are on the same page) and wants to spend time with his baby over drunken friends. We are also very much looking forward to being together whilst his on his paternity leave, I'm not the sort to want to boot him out after a few days.

Don't mean this sound confrontational if that is how it reads.

daisypond · 23/05/2019 17:50

I don’t quite understand. Why should they have to cut down on drinking? Unless for their health?

MissMilly88 · 23/05/2019 17:50

I asked my partner from about 39 weeks to cut down and make sure that if he did have a drink it was just one or two beers. We don't have family super close so if he was too drunk to drive we'd have been a bit stuck! As it happened she came 2 weeks late and enjoyed a much overdue drink afterwards :)

OliviaBenson · 23/05/2019 17:51

How much does he drink? Sounds worrying...

Drogosnextwife · 23/05/2019 17:51

My partner drank once while I was pregnant at a wedding reception we both went to, I was about 8 weeks. He didn't drink again until ds was about 5 months old and we went out for our first night out for my birthday.

Drogosnextwife · 23/05/2019 17:53

I don’t quite understand. Why should they have to cut down on drinking? Unless for their health?

Incase they need to go to the hospital?

Greggers2017 · 23/05/2019 17:57

That's the reason exactly. Going to hospital. We usually go out with work mates after work on a Friday. The older kids are with their Mum/dad at the weekend so we have free time.
I'm now to big and uncomfortable to go now so I've stopped going. We were both just wondering as obviously I would like him at the hospital and to be able to drive preferably but we can get a taxi no issue there.

OP posts:
Greggers2017 · 23/05/2019 17:58

Definitely not worrying how much he drinks. We both have very stressful jobs so he deserves his weekly night out. Nothing I can say bad about him whatsoever.

OP posts:
daisypond · 23/05/2019 17:58

I still don’t see how going to hospital has any relevance on a partner’s drinking. Obviously you wouldn’t want them to be rolling drunk.

ChipsAreLife · 23/05/2019 17:58

Mine didn't really, he's not a huge drinker but he likes a couple. I appreciate I'm pretty laid back though and a lot of people don't do it beyond 37 weeks

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