To find Mumsnet to be very Victorian?

[Calltheguards]

I'm not sure if maybe this was always the case and I'm just slow to pick up on it but... AIBU to find Mumsnet very Victorian? It seems like a lot of people post here just to shame others and like to control/dictate behaviour. In a historical context the shame aspect reminds me of the Victorian Era with individuals gossiping amongst neighbours to join in. Flaming the OP for having feelings that are contrary to the majority seems a bit of a sport.

Is Mumsnet the technical modern age answer to Victorian Era levels of propriety and shame? I'm just posting this for discussion of an observation and wondering if this was always the point of this website.

I know what you mean, OP. People's responses on threads can very 'I would respond to situation X by immediately doing Y and you should do the same' as though none of them in real life hum and haw and fanny about thinking things over.

I also think there can be quite Victorian attitudes to sex on MN. As though it's something to be endured.

I particularly love the posters who like to berate OPs for not having a time machine or the power of future sight. Go back in time and don't have that next child/marry him yadda yadda.

No shit Sherlock, thanks for that.

No, the Victorians didn’t wash all that often and everyone on mumsnet has 2 showers a day + a strip wash of their bits before and after sex

Yep I agree. I don’t believe people act like this in RL though.

Saskia your post is not interesting or provocative enough to be deleted
Your just berating op,and suggesting she’s a troll

did victorians have internet. call a cunt a cunt

‘Perpetually clenched’ .

My fantasy picture of the ‘MN Bot Victorian era model’ is a sparrow-limbed, glossy haired specimen who makes Gwynneth Paltrow look as though she simply isn’t making an effort. She combines perfect and fragrant childcare with a high-flying career, has a firm-jawed yet sensitive DH and a fulfillingly monogomous sex life in which counselling is sought for any improper thought that should occur to the said DH.

I hope she never moves in next to me!

There are some lovely posters on here. I try to float past the others.

I don't know why a discussion has upset you guys?

TBH I name change often. I do not have social media because I do not like having my identity out there for random people. This is an anonymous forum and I don't know why a simple discussion has bothered you guys so much as to call me a troll? Maybe the trolls are the troll accusers?

LipstickHandbagCoffee if you'd been here for more than five minutes you'd know that calling someone a troll is grounds for deletion.

No fragrant children,fuck no.unfragranced children,draped in undryed hemp
Mn women sneeze if next door uses febreeze,they can’t tolerate air freshener,or perfume. Get hives at mere thought of fabric softener.v sensitive noses you see

Saskia I know you’re being v silly and feety stampy

Sorry, but if you buy your size tens from M and S you’re wearing the equivalent of a Billy Smart’s Circus tent.

I was on a thread about vanity sizing once and mentioned that I didn't think sizing had changed that much in the past 20 years as I had a size 10 suit from that time and it seemed to fit much the same as the size 10s I buy today. I had my arse handed to me on a plate.

And do not even mention Fruit Shoots.

Calltheguards
I really don't think that Mumsnet was started to gather gossips together to bitch and be judgemental about others.
There is a podcast by Justine, the founder of Mumsnet and she explains why she started the site.
If that's what you feel that this site is then I suggest that you maybe stop reading only AIBU threads and have a browse.
There are so many topics and so many really helpful, intelligent women all willing to share experiences and give sound advice.

TBH I name change often. I do not have social media because I do not like having my identity out there for random people.

Yeah, sure you do.

MN isn't social media, it's a forum. No, I'm not a troll, but I can see why you'd like to divert that accusation away from you.

MNHQ - this has been raised before, but the policy of allowing ad hoc name changes is a gift to trolls. Maybe have a rethink of how it is used?

I don't think MN is "anything", there's such a variety of posters that it cannot be one thing or another.

I am always surprised by the amount of very angry and bitter posters though, the hatred against men, the hatred against couples and the bitterness against SAHM is so violent. Some posters really have issues.
I work, but I cannot understand why some posters hate women who chose to raise their kids and stay home so much. Jealousy maybe?

The narrow-mindness is also quite amusing. Whilst many acknowledge that people do things differently, others are convinced that anyone doing or thinking differently must be lying or deluded.

LipstickHandbagCoffee's been a member of this parish for a few years I'd warrant.

Fruit shoots and baby formula. Akin to crack frankly
Made in a dirty factory,full of chemicals,fish eyes and fetid water

There is an increasing amount of annoying group think. Especially with a middle class slant. So lots of posts about environmental issues but without thinking that that showers twice a day, driving to the gym and buying dinner from somewhere open until 12am might have impacted the environment.
But I do quite like that the feminist agenda seems to get through. The no truck with men not paying for their children/ abortion debates,, derision of the female “ dream”” of stupidly expensive non fun weddings and the alternative trans viewpoint are all well constructed arguments.

@Calltheguards you've surely got an Irish connection

Nah I’m newbie as saskia said
Don’t let the door hit my arse as I head out the door

DippyAvocado

A plate? Are you sure it wasn’t a dustbin lid?