Pregnant and smoking

[Moominfan]

Do you judge mums who are pregnant and smoke? There was some work place drama today. Pregnant lady over heard a comment made by two members of staff about her smoking. Must have touched a nerve. One of the two ladies is struggling to conceive so I imagine seeing someone drain a cancer stick whilst pregnant must be repugnant to her.

Also just to add while I'm on my high horse I did used to smoke myself pre kids so I do understand how hard quitting is and people lecturing you has the complete opposite affect. I was also tremendously fat while pregnant, with weight still to lose.

Not ashamed to admit yes I absolutely do judge pregnant mums who smoke. If they want to breathe in poison fine it's their body (and I say this as an ex smoker) but don't do it to a baby who has no say.

Imo if you know you are pregnant you should make every effort to ensure you have a healthy baby.
Yes I would greatly judge.

Also think the same of pregnant people who eat sht and don't excersise.

its difficult... theres probably no need to gossip/ talk behind people's backs, thats unprofessional especially in a workplace...but honestly yes i would. I'm struggling to TTC and i can't seem to help myself thinking similar when i see things like this. i was driving past a school today at pick up time and was just hit by a feeling of how unfair it was by some of the more unsavoury types with 4 kids breathing smoke all over them with unwashed clothes, and i would never do that but can't have a baby (yet). But you'll soon get the "i never think bad things about anyone brigade" on here saying we are all awful.

i claim temporary fertility related madness

Yes. I do judge. If fucking hideous.

Yes I judge on the face of it. Of course I do.
I just assume there are mitigating factors that make quitting not a priority to the mother.
Hopefully she's judging herself more than anyone else ever could.

Yes I judge.
If you cannot sacrifice 9 months then how can you dedicate the next 16-18 years + to a child?

No effort to cut back with an aim of stopping? Yes I'd judge.

I can't stop thinking about cigarettes, even though I stopped about six weeks before falling pregnant (one slip up after - vape battery ran out while pissed. Unfortunately didn't know I was pregnant at the time or I'd not have been pissed and would have had will power!!)

I'm hoping the urge will go away once baby comes and I'd be "allowed"- because I really don't actually want to start again, it's no good for babies that are out of the womb either.

Yes I do, I also judge people who eat loads of crap and drink while pregnant. If you can't be healthy for nine months it might not be the right time to have a baby

I assume that they are finding it difficult, but it does make me wince. It's much worse than drinking or eating badly. It really is very bad for the baby.

No I don't judge. I wouldn't have done it myself. I was a she wolf with super smelling powers and even the faintest whiff of cigarette smoke made me heave when I was pregnant.

But I don't judge those who do. I have no idea what's happening in her life--extreme mental health issues, stress, abuse etc etc. I also know from a midwife pal that the stress and changes to her body when withdrawing from smoking could be as harmful to the pregnancy as smoking a controlled amount.

And... When I was pregnant I worked in the centre of a huge polluted city and got buses to and from work. Our health board had started to check pregnant women's CO2 levels at their check in. Mine were that of a light smoker due to air pollution. Scary. So I suppose be as sanctimonious as you like... I won't judge you for judging, I can see why you might.

Yes I judge.
When you make the decision to continue a pregnancy then you should be signing up to make positive choices for the good of the baby.
I can't stand it when people smoke when pregnant, drink to excess when pregnant (though i understand someone choosing to have one glass of fizz at an event even though I wouldn't take the risk), eat loads of junk food etc.

I judge people who smoke whether pregnant or not. I definitely think people who prefer cigarettes over the safety of their unborn child should reconsider their priorities.

If you cannot sacrifice 9 months then how can you dedicate the next 16-18 years + to a child? That's not really how addiction works though.

I always assumed that as soon as I found out I was pregnant I'd be able to quit smoking straight away as my maternal instinct would override my addiction . It was actually a lot harder than that and took me around 3 months to quit. However I did quit, it took a lot of willpower, NRT and a fabulous NHS stop smoking midwife and I was able to quit for good.
So to answer your question, I wouldn't judge someone who couldnt quit straight away or that was trying their hardest to quit but was struggling but I would judge someone who carried on smoking without even trying to stop.

Zippy, I are almost exclusively fruit in my first trimester and lost nearly a stone...because I felt sick ALL THE TIME. Very unhealthy, but it allowed me to keep functioning and working. It seems very unfair to judge people on what they eat when they are trying to get through that.

I used to judge very much and thought it was disgusting. I was a smoker and when I fell pregnant with my first child I quit straight away and continued to abstain until i found out my partner had cheated on me, then we split and I started smoking again to cope with the stress. Then I found out I was pregnant and ummed and ahhed about keeping the baby and told myself it didn't matter if I still smoked as I may not keep it any way. I finally decided to keep it but I still feel such a disconnect and so stressed that I still smoke, albeit significantly less than before. I am ashamed of myself and never smoke in public to avoid judgement. But I've stopped judging others as it has now made me realise that you have no idea what is going on in other people's lives.

It is awful! I remember seeing a documentary about midwives on the TV a few years ago and the pregnant lady said her baby will have a stronger heart because she's smoking and it needs to work harder 🤦‍♀️

Does anyone know children of smokers? My MIL smoked heavily with my DP and in the house as he was growing up and he was very underweight at birth but very tall and muscular now. In the back of my mind I worry about his heart though and any undiagnosed conditions.

Yes I judge. It's a dirty, filthy, foul habit and why would you make a not-yet-born infant pollute their lungs with such crap?

And yes, mothers-to-be should exercise and eat well, but eating a burger and chips doesn't have an immediate detrimental effect. Sometimes a mother eats very little during pregnancy because of morning (ha!) sickness. A baby takes its nutrients from its mother and is quite selfish about it and can still thrive when she's eating next to nothing. The two aren't the same

Yes I do judge. But I keep my comments and thoughts to myself

I judge..you can tell from a smoking pregnant woman the type of parent she will be.

There will be many people in their 40s and older whose mother smoked throughout their pregnancies. Mine did. I did. I’m healthier than all my contemporaries, so is my son. Obviously we all know better now but worrying about an adult’s health because of it is pointless.

Yes, I absolutely do judge. There is a huge amount of resources available to help people quit smoking if they give a shit enough to do it. I think smoking when you are pregnant or have children is one of the most disgustingly selfish things a parent can do.