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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Not to want to be forced into sorting out who's going where for CHRISTMAS at the beginning of July?

52 replies

Birdly · 20/07/2007 07:31

Surely I'm not the only one who doesn't want to get embroiled in this until, ooh, November at the earliest.

OP posts:
quiveutmabonnebaguette · 20/07/2007 10:31

Is it bad to have the xmas without the gps...but just us parents and our children ? At xmas, it's just us and the children for a week and it's so nice...I love it..no parents no pil...just us

UnquietDad · 20/07/2007 10:37

Can't we have a universal ban on even mentioning fucking C----mas until at least mid-November?

Budababe · 20/07/2007 10:41

No UnquietDad - we can't!

Some of us need to plan and book flights and houses etc etc.

babygrand · 20/07/2007 10:50

I know when I had to organise work Christmas parties in London if you left it until July, you were WAY too late and there was nowhere available.

charmingMyrtle · 20/07/2007 11:05

Usually, we spend christmas with my parents & ss, with my brother alternation between us & their inlaws. Another sis has spent the last few christmases at her inlaws house. Thats fine, their choice fine.

days after last christmas (I mean it was still 2006),that sis invited us all to spend christmas 2007 at their house. All my family were thrilled and said great. Only then to be told, that all of her dh's family would be going to. I quickly got out of it by saying that was too many people for them, and we would stay at home and do our own thing.
The rest of the family are kind of stuck now. My sis dh's family are ok but my family don't realy want to spend christmas with them.

mummytosophie · 20/07/2007 11:06

my mother in law wanted to plan christmas in march last year ........!!! It was to go to her house not on holiday or anything with flights etc ??

Judy1234 · 20/07/2007 11:16

In some families like ours it has to be planned because of complex diaries and work etc. I just booked our skiing holiday and had to look at 3 different university dates and school dates for a start for December 2007. Then I had to notify the various grandparents and yes we certainly have sorted it out by now.

legalalien · 20/07/2007 11:27

I know someone whose DP and family have been discussing WHAT THEY ARE HAVING FOR XMAS DINNER this month. Now THAT's OTT.

lissie · 20/07/2007 11:51

my parents split up when i was a baby and havent spoken since (not even on my wedding day) my mum has gone on to have 2 more children, my dad 5, 2 of whom live away from home,, dh's parents are still together but sil and bil have to sort out bil's family as well... unfortunately the modern christmas has to be planned with military precision

maisemor · 20/07/2007 12:02

Nothing much to plan really. Every second year in Scotland (hubby's dad and stepmum makes it. We spend it with my sister at our place on the 24th as that it the day/evening I call Christmas) every other year abroad (at my sister's with her children - she is separated from the father of the children and they have them every second year).

Everybody knows where they should be every year, and are happy (enough) with it.

pinkrangerstartstowaddle · 20/07/2007 12:06

OMG - christams!!!
We are "due"at ILs this year but will have 2 children by then, it normally is good fun but everyone ends up getting drunk, my dh rows with his nan ( she gets very drunk and abusive) and then i end up looking after the kids after they have been hyped up!

Am going to try and stay at home this year!

hannahsaunt · 20/07/2007 12:11

My mum told me in MAY that she had booked her hols at work around being with us at Christmas! It's not that we don't want my parents here nor that we had really thought about being anywhere other than home this year but still ... There is a certain advantage in making plans and having them announced to avoid late awkwardnesses. Hmmm. May go and email all relatives now...

mazzystar · 20/07/2007 12:16

its just that time goes much more quickly for old people
5 months seems like a fortnight to them
you will be like it too just wait

Peachy · 20/07/2007 12:19

DH's (yong) colleague ahs a calendar counting down days to vhristmas, started february. I wondered if ti was the only time he gets to go home (polish chap) but it appears not, he's just very excited.

having said that I have already discuseed venue with DH, and even menu . Shopping starts September as I get a grant then that alsts until after Christmas and it is the best way for me to budget.

mazzystar · 20/07/2007 12:25

and lets face it, it seems like november already

LowFatMilkshake · 20/07/2007 12:27

Ha ha ha

SIL and I have already decreed that we'll each be spending Christmas in our own homes with our children. As I no longer have family of my own I have no issues, but our MIL is not going to like....do we care......no

Holly29 · 20/07/2007 12:35

I am currently 30 weeks pg, so will have my first child by Xmas, so unfortunately we did have to think about Xmas early, if only so we could decide was best for us! Have decided to rent one big house in Cotswolds and whoever wants to come can come (as long as they promise to babysit in the evenings). Result!

bratnav · 20/07/2007 12:41

I started to think about this the other day (sad I know), but I have a new DP, my 2 DDs are with me this Christmas day, at exHs for Boxing day. No idea what DPs DD will be doing, that's a discussion he needs to have with his exW I suppose.

My parents were making noises about having us this year as they were abroad last year, DPs parents will definitely want us there (DP says!) with his DB and SIL, I can't bear to think about it all.

Oh, and we are moving house to a new town around October time fun and games...

OrmIrian · 20/07/2007 12:45

The subject tried to raise it's head a few weeks ago. So I smacked it firmly on the nose and sent it back. It will return though just not yet.

Blackduck · 20/07/2007 12:59

We are going away - just need to line up ILs to have the hound...

Oblomov · 20/07/2007 13:08

LOL.
Dh, I and ds are always at home on christmas day. Its lovely.
We arrange to visit both our mums for the day, soemtime during the christmas holidays.
Plus, we have (dh is big catholic family)our family party at some time, normally early December. This is the one, for which discussions start in Sept - at whose house (it is ALWAYS the same!) at what time (it is ALWAYS the same!) , who cooks what (it is ALWAYS the same!) - I don't knmow why we bother discussing it. It always gets fractious. One sister says that one brother hasn't ......
FGS

OrmIrian · 20/07/2007 13:12

I must admit I like having extra bods for christmas day. Otherwise I think that DH would probably slob around all day reading the paper and the kids would drive me mad while I was trying to cook lunch.

I quite like going to my parents house - it's bigger and I suppose it has memories for me. DH not so keen but as I normally do most of the cooking and organising I don't think he has much right to complain. The kids like it better too. Wouldn';t want to stay away from home though. Christmas Eve and Boxing Day are definitely days for being at home.

mylittlefreya · 20/07/2007 13:49

To the OP - YANBU.

Last year I spent weeks trying to sort out Christmas, only to have my mother operated on and given a terminal diagnosis two weeks before Christmas, and the I delivered my prem dd by emergency section on Christmas Eve. We all spent Christmas Day in my hospital room and everyone was nicer to each other than I can ever remember. Wonder whether its worth some other mortal drama this year just to have a nice day????

theressomethingaboutmarie · 20/07/2007 13:58

We're due our first baby on the 10th of October so I imagine that it's going ot be hard to get out of going to SIL's AGAIN this year as everyone will want to see the baby.

Funny thing is, that when we are there, no one really gives a crap about us (we're too old to be the "kids" but too young to be the "adults" apparently - we're 31 and 32 .

I would give up every present I would ever receive this Christmas to be at home with my DH and our DC. That's absolutely all I want....wishful thinking I imagine.

Last year when at his SIL's, she actually told us off for going out visiting friends during Christmas Day despite us stating that we would be back later. We were caught between being amused and horrified as her reaction to the plans that we had and had advised her of.

2spells · 20/07/2007 15:11

she won'y like it but....we do the same as www.