To have de-friended this couple

[MummyEmoo]

Have NC'd for this.
DH and I been married over 10 years. His close long-standing friend who we'll call Andy was best man. My DH was best man at Andy's wedding to Laura.
We don't see Andy and Laura very regularly though do see them from time to time but when their son had a chronic condition (now largely resolved) we would send gifts, we helped with fundraising, donated money and gave up time to help at fundraising events. Not sure what happened to the money they raised but that's a whole other subject!
My DH who was newly self employed gave up a day of work to help them move house. They appealed for help on Facebook and only my DH and one other helped. He worked like a Trojan all day driving back and forth. Twice recently Andy has called me at length for legal advice, not even for them but for people they know who've got themselves in a fix.
Last summer I organised and paid for a weekend away for a big birthday. Invited Andy, Laura and their 2 DC. Had about 14 families in total I think. After much uncertainty they eventually came, empty handed - not so much as a card - fine but I only mention this as it has recently dawned on us they are takers in life. They ate, seemed to have fun, brought along another child I'd never met or invited and left the next day without a thank you.
Fast forward to now. We've had a rotten year in which I lost both parents - one just before my party weekend and the other earlier this year but we're coping.
Yesterday I looked on Facebook to find that Laura had a big birthday party night the Saturday before last. A big affair with a lot of guests - apparent from the photos. We weren't invited, knew nothing about it.
DH is as surprised as me that we didn't make the guest list. Obviously 80 or so others were more important.
They can invite who they like, I get that. But in a hissy fit of pique, and general annoyance at how one sided the friendship has been, I unfriended both on Facebook. This is, of course, something I can't undo. I expect they will notice eventually as I post quite regularly. I don't regret unfriending them. DH is fine with it.
But my AIBU is am I silly to feel hurt over the lack of invite, and will we look daft when DH tells Andy why I unfriended them (if Andy asks)? You didn't invite us to your party sounds a bit snivelly.

You have lost absolutely NOTHING! Enjoy your life without them ungrateful users in it. They will noticed you unfriended them when they want something, when it does happen if they try contact you in any shape or form, i would simply ignore. I dont think you owe them any explanation.

YANBU. Enjoy your new job OP, neverminnd leeching exfriends. There are still good people out there.
@mary1066 as somebody on MN said a while ago “an honest person will apologize, liar will get defensive”. Proved to be true.

Life’s too short for shit friends, so you’re absolutely right to call it a day with them.

I remember being in a similar situation - having a sudden realisation that I was in a rather one sided friendship. They weren’t a “taker” as such, but certainly rarely said or did anything particularly nice for me for a long time. I cut them a lot of slack for a long time and then thought “Fuck this”. The next occasion when they did something truly horrible I walked away.

Even if they thought you wouldn't be up to going to a party in view of your bereavements you could have at least been included in invites. Think you have learned what kind of people they. Have they even noticed they have been unfriended?

A pair of life’s takers. You’re well rid. Really sorry to hear about this after your rotten year xx

I always read those threads where someone asks what was the final line that ended their relationship. Because it's fascinating how often it is the straw that broke the camel's back. Which is clearly what's happened with you. And YANBU to have been hurt.

I'm wondering if I should do a bit of gentle unfriending on facebook for similar reasons. Had fall out with one woman. Fine. But have now been excluded entirely from the entire extended group as a result. All very friendly when they see me, but no invites etc. Which is fine, that's their right. But I do find it hurtful every time I see the facebook posts so maybe I should take a leaf ou too your book.

Thank you everyone, no they haven't noticed they've been unfriended or if they have we've not heard.
I had found their constant "who'll help us or lend us posts" just irritated me. So it's nice not to see that anymore.
Don't get me wrong, we didn't help them out constantly but when they needed help we were there. As a PP said, it's strange they didn't see us both as both their friends, not just his. Laura benefited just as much when we gave help, and rocked up at my birthday weekend which I invited them and their DC to as I saw them as my friends not just DH's. They're entitled to see it different but then I'm entitled to walk away.
Thinking about it, they've never done a thing for us and we have had nothing from the friendship. It's all been one way. We have other much nicer friends.

Do it Bling! Take control of the situation, it feels good!

If you don’t want to see posts on Facebook that are upsetting, but don’t want to unfriend them, then you can unfollow them. I do that when friends use their Facebook page to advertise products they’re selling.

Thanks Lizzie - I've done that with MLM/Younique/Scentsy, etc friends, but actually did want to unfriend these two. Was worried after that I might regret it or be seen as petty, but this thread has helped and I'm not regretting it at all

I know that, OP. I was actually replying to BlingLoving, who doesn’t want to unfriend that whole group, she doesn’t need to. I’m your case, it’s more a case of good riddance to bad rubbish, I think??

I mean ‘in your case’! I’m sick of predictiv text sometimes!!

Lizzie - I could unfollow. But I know I'd then be sneakily going off to look at their posts to see what I'm missing out on! It would probably be better just to unfriend them. It's tricky only in that they're part of the school crowd. But I am going to give it seirious thought - unfollow or unfriend. One of the two. definitely.

I once emailed a friend to explain why I could no longer be friends.
Very liberating....

Summer tell us more...

OP sorry for your loss and you are rightly angry.

They have slowly revealed the type of people they are, and you have slowly seen it.
Time to move on from them.