To not be able to do a no 2 if my DP is anywhere near the bathroom? How do you get over this?

[InfuriatinglyDelicateFlower]

DP and I have been together 3 years and I still can't go if I'm not absolutely alone ie DP has to be Far Far Away in a different part of whatever house or flat we're in. I feel almost panicky and extremely tense unless I'm completely alone. So just can't go, which isn't exactly great for health.

Ensuites are awful for this. I live in a shared house in London with an en suite which is great when I'm here alone, not so much when my beloved is with me. It's fine when in DP's own place due to layout of house and nobody else being around either.

Who else finds en suites awful?

Wow, water use in the UK is reaching crisis point and we could run out of water in the next 25 years; but people are really running water to cover the sounds of their own poo?

Seriously 🙄, don’t be so ridiculous.

Thinking that it's not ridiculous, is ridiculous.

I have learnt to accept that I can hear DH poop through two closed doors (toilet door & bedroom door), and presume that he can therefore also hear me poop. Short of waiting until the other person leaves the house, I don't think we have an option. But it's never talked about, we pretend it doesn't happen.

I couldn't poop with him in the same room. He cannot poop in an en-suite.

I take my iPad into the loo with me if I'm going to be in there for a while... Listen to music, read the papers online. My partner does the same. It helps that we each have a bathroom (unless there are guests) so can be as antisocial as we please.

The worst place is his family's house. The toilet is downstairs and you have to go through the living room & kitchen to get there. So everyone knows if you're peeing or pooing. Utterly hideous!

I don't care if he's in the next room or talking to me through the door, and he will often discuss his faecal status with me, but no one needs to be present to smell someone else's bowel movement! A good reason to also keep the door shut and window open. I don't find smelling it people's poo pleasant do I wouldn't inflict mine on others. With small DC it's inevitable, and I'm not fussed about that.

Also not everyone poos during childbirth! I didn't think I had, but asked DH after. He said definitely not, which he was surprised about as he'd expected it.

I have IBS so if I don’t go when I need to go it gives me horrific stomach ache for days.

Persimmonn how is it ridiculous? One poster was saying they run the shower! The average shower uses 8 l/min. Assuming a 5 min poo that’s 40 L of water used just “covering up the sound”. Being generous and assuming 3 poo’s a week; that’s over 6000L of drinking quality drinking water being used! Why not play some music instead?

Given the current fashion around here at the moment is to pearl clutch the second someone so much as uses a plastic drinking straw, I don’t think it’s silly to encourage people to be a bit more responsible with their water use.

I had an upset stomach the other morning and was hopping around waiting for DP to leave the bedroom so I could poo and he came back in. I was so embarrassed.

I would be embarrassed too if my DH caught me shitting in the bedroom

You run the tap to hide poo sounds? How wasteful and weird

No it’s not, I don’t do it all the time. The water warms up in the time I finish.

Surely it's more wasteful that you are using the hot tap

I used to be like this. I really can't remember what is was that changed my ways, but I am now able to poo with the door wide open while my DH stands there and asks me where his car keys are. Doesn't bother either of us in the slightest.

I’ve been with DH for 19 years and am still like this. I don’t do toilet humour or over sharing.

The thought of being in the same room while the other is on the toilet 😱🤮

I know some people are like this & always found it odd. Amongst the ones I know like this, they are the same ones who tended to leave their babies & toddlers in playpens etc & never took them with them when they went to the loo... (Mine still just comes to the bathroom with me at 2.5, sometimes he has a sit on his potty while I go ). I don't think it's a coincidence that the same people then struggled with toddlers hiding behind sofa to poo/resisting potty training . Normal daily/bodily functions are nothing to stress or be ashamed about!

I'm quite shocked bu6the number of people who have been with partners many years and can't poo near them. I don't poo in front of my partner to me that's just unnecessary and I wouldn't want to see him poo! I think it would kill a bit of sexual attraction

Worked with someone who couldn't use any loo except her own. She used to go home at lunch time so she could use her loo. Wouldn't drink or eat at work. Wouldn't go on holiday but she'd occasionally agree to a weekend in Brighton as long as her husband would drive her home (40 miles) midway then back. It was a real problem for her. My sympathy OP.

Worked with someone who couldn't use any loo except her own. She used to go home at lunch time so she could use her loo. Wouldn't drink or eat at work. Wouldn't go on holiday but she'd occasionally agree to a weekend in Brighton as long as her husband would drive her home (40 miles) midway then back. It was a real problem for her. My sympathy OP.

My now husband and I went on a little trip to Whitby for the weekend. About a month into our relationship.
There was a mistake with the hotel booking so we had to find somewhere else quite quickly and the room we ended up in had an en suite with a louvre door that you could see right through. That was fun.

To the person bragging about how they leave the door open..... Nothing to brag about its just disgusting and rank (vomit)

I'm the same. Better than I was but I still pick my stealth moments! DP on the other hand leaves the door open, he also has Crohn's so he's in the loo a few times a day. He'd never be able to hide it

I’m totally with you on this one... I can’t trump in front of him either, and probably have accidentally once in 10 years 🙈 I wait until he goes to work (he leaves first) then go to the toilet....
I’ve had kids with him and yes it’s all bodily functions but I feel there is something sacred about it... that he just doesn’t need to smell or know about!

I'm the same! Don't get leaving doors open and over sharing bowel motions! With Dh 10 years and have never done a poo when he is in the same area! If we stay in hotels I go to reception toilets, have 2 friends who also do this!

I hate to break it to you Pppppppp1234 but the chances are that while you are asleep you probably let rip! So he’s definitely heard you fart all the time

Been with my dh 20 years can't poo in front of him, can just about pee in our an shite,but anything else I have to use other bathroom.

En suite for heaven's sake

I was the same with DP until we had a baby. Once I was post c-section and he had to help me onto and off the loo for the first few days, all dignity went out of the window .

DH and I will happily pee in front of each other but poos are always solo with doors locked. We both have bowel issues and I hear him on the loo and I know he can hear me but just prefer not to be seen! As our diverticular disease (both of us) has got worse over time I think we are generally just both sympathetic of each others problems - apart from the morning I emerged from the bathroom and DH was looking behind me in a puzzled way. When I asked him what the matter was he said "I was just wondering where you've hidden the trombone you were playing in there"