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Original poster

Is £350 per week enough to live on (family of 5)?

331 replies

DiscontinuedModelHusband · 14/05/2019 10:18

DW and I are struggling a bit financially.
Over the last few months, we just seem to be treading water - no additional money saved, credit card/overdraft debt not reducing.

I've worked out that after all our normal bills, mortgage, credit cards, regular kids activities, savings etc we should have about £1400 per month to live on (for food, clothes, presents, eating out etc).

DW thinks this is unreasonable, and that I should ask my parents for help (they are fairly well off, but by no means wealthy).

My argument is that asking my parents is not really a sustainable solution in the long-term - I think we need to fix our spending habits.

She's now not speaking to me , because she thinks my pride is the problem.

There is a smidgen of truth to this - DW and my parents have a frosty relationship, meaning we barely see them (perhaps once per fortnight, for a meal - mainly DW's choice).

I feel uncomfortable asking them for financial help when they don't really get many normal grandparent benefits (proper time with GCs, they never get to holiday with us, GCs have never stayed at their house etc).

Our relationship is largely financial as it is (they help with school trips, uniform, have lent us money in the past), and I dislike this very much (I don't think my parents love it either, but have always been happy to help).

Should I just swallow my pride here?

Or should we try and sort things ourselves?
Is this even possible for £350 per month?

OP posts:
LadyRannaldini · 14/05/2019 12:42

you can’t ask your parents for assistance

Especially as it sounds like your wife is responsible for the strained relationship with them, she sounds to have adopted the anti-PIL approach.

Poppyinafieldofdreams · 14/05/2019 12:42

Another wealth redistribution post. Yawn.

Vote labour.

louise5754 · 14/05/2019 12:44

Is this for real?

My husband works away. Risks his life every day.

We don't have any spare money. Often when he is allowed hime he can't afford to come see us.

At times we have had to get loans to cover costs so most of his wage goes on that.

Loupyloula · 14/05/2019 12:47

This is a joke right? Who would spend all their savings on a holiday and have no safety net?

BlackeyedGruesome · 14/05/2019 12:47

Bloody hell, that's loads.

LagunaBubbles · 14/05/2019 12:50

will be tight but you’ll get by

Tight?? You seriously think having £350 a week left after bills means it will be tight?? Hmm

darkriver19886 · 14/05/2019 12:51

Your not struggling or skint you have a cash flow problem. You need to get on the same page as your wife and find out where your money is going.

cantfindname · 14/05/2019 12:52

Up until recently I was living on £400 per month. £350 a week would seem like heaven to me.

Bluesheep8 · 14/05/2019 12:54

That's more than manageable imo. What confuses me though, is why you describe DW and your parents' relationship as 'frosty' when you see them once a fortnight? I don't think that's frosty at all I thought you were going to say you saw them once a year or something...

Scanon · 14/05/2019 12:54

I guess your DW is used to having a lot more money to throw around. Your budgeted amount is more than enough, if you don't eat out much and take picnics when you have day trips with the kids. Spend minimal amounts on birthday presents. Cut down on unplanned purchases.

ssd · 14/05/2019 12:56

This thread will be in the daily mail in a few days.
If you want to be in it too, keep pouring your heart out.

elliejjtiny · 14/05/2019 12:56

We live on that much before rent, bills etc

Heymummee · 14/05/2019 12:59

That’s a LOT of disposable income. Some people don’t even earn that in a month.
If it means not going out for a while and swapping to a cheaper supermarket so be it. You can’t seriously expect help when you have that amount of money spare. If you had NOTHING and were struggling to keep a roof over your head and feed the children then that’s a different matter entirely, but to wonder whether £50 a day is enough to scrape by on is ridiculous IMO.

TenPastTen · 14/05/2019 13:01

Ridiculous. If this is real I bet you wish you didn't post now.

We earn not much more than that a month and that has to cover everything. The kids are lucky if we can afford a £3.50 trip to soft play once a month.

You've got used to a style of living that isn't sustainable clearly if that isn't enough money.

stucknoue · 14/05/2019 13:04

£350 after mortgage and bills is a lot. You need to look at your expenditure!

Chippychipsforme · 14/05/2019 13:05

Well it's more than enough isn't it? I hope to god neither of you work in finance.

The fact you would wipe out your savings to book a holiday is ridiculous. What if your boiler breaks? Or your car needs a significant repair?

What lessons are you teaching your kids here?

RobotNews · 14/05/2019 13:05

Family of 4 here - we live on £1400 a month including bills!! It sounds like your DW needs to adjust her expectations since your salary drop. As do you if you’re buying holidays you can’t afford - surely you’d be better off putting that money towards your debts!?

lulabaloo · 14/05/2019 13:08

Were a family of 5 and we are lucky if we have £350 left to last us the month.

Gazelda · 14/05/2019 13:10

£50 spending money every day is a struggle? Astonishing.
I'd be too embarrassed to admit that to my parents, especially as they help out with school costs etc.

pudding21 · 14/05/2019 13:12

When I was younger and had a double income and no kids, I spent a lot of money on shit. Clothes and cosmetics mainly I didn't need and I never really had to worry about money, 1-2 holidays a year etc.

I am now a single parent solely supporting 2 kids and at the end of each month I barely have 200 euros to feed the three of us, the dog and fuel etc. 1400 is more than enough to support your family and save or pay off your debt without having hand outs from your parents.

DW seems to have got used to having a higher income and hasn't or won't change. I barely spend any money on hair cuts, nails, cosmetics, clothes etc anymore and my life isn't any worse from it.

edwinbear · 14/05/2019 13:13

I'm guessing OP you are an ex banker who was made redundant, as you reference losing bonuses and share options? And DW is struggling to accept she's no longer the wife of a highly paid banker, so still trying to live a champagne life on lemonade money?

If I'm right, you need to just explain to her you were fortunate to have enjoyed a great lifestyle for a while but those days are long gone and you need to cut your cloth accordingly.

That means fewer and cheaper holidays, less eating out. You eat out with your parents twice a month, start taking it in turns to each at each others houses and cook. That will save you c.£200 a month for a start.

Maryann1975 · 14/05/2019 13:27

I’m sure someone was on here a few days ago asking if it was doable to manage on £400 a month after bills etc have been paid. You are asking about £350 a week!

I have no idea how I would spend that much money each week. We just don’t need that much stuff. So it’s definitely a case that you need to change your habits, cut your spending, learn to appreciate the stuff you have and simplify your lives a bit and pay off your debt and learn to live within your means.

Happyhusband · 14/05/2019 13:31

£350 a week for pizza and piss ups? Not enough? You're kidding right?

Myheartbelongsto · 14/05/2019 13:31

Of course it’s doable and if not then yo get better paid jobs, both of you. It’s not up to your parents to help you out

stayathomer · 14/05/2019 13:32

I'd assume you've been doing things to the max up until now. Easy remedies lower health insurance, cut tv so you just have e.g. Netflix, look at cutting down on phones, no eating out or takeaways and nights out or away only when absolutely necessary. Clothes only that are necessary, cut kids activities that seem unnecessary ( ie that they don't adore). Cut out drink and smoking. We feed 4kids and the two of us on 110 euro a week tops and eat well.