Is £350 per week enough to live on (family of 5)?

[DiscontinuedModelHusband]

DW and I are struggling a bit financially.
Over the last few months, we just seem to be treading water - no additional money saved, credit card/overdraft debt not reducing.

I've worked out that after all our normal bills, mortgage, credit cards, regular kids activities, savings etc we should have about £1400 per month to live on (for food, clothes, presents, eating out etc).

DW thinks this is unreasonable, and that I should ask my parents for help (they are fairly well off, but by no means wealthy).

My argument is that asking my parents is not really a sustainable solution in the long-term - I think we need to fix our spending habits.

She's now not speaking to me , because she thinks my pride is the problem.

There is a smidgen of truth to this - DW and my parents have a frosty relationship, meaning we barely see them (perhaps once per fortnight, for a meal - mainly DW's choice).

I feel uncomfortable asking them for financial help when they don't really get many normal grandparent benefits (proper time with GCs, they never get to holiday with us, GCs have never stayed at their house etc).

Our relationship is largely financial as it is (they help with school trips, uniform, have lent us money in the past), and I dislike this very much (I don't think my parents love it either, but have always been happy to help).

Should I just swallow my pride here?

Or should we try and sort things ourselves?
Is this even possible for £350 per month?

When you are solvent look at pensions. Not jam today.

We are a family of five and now that I have gone back to work we are pretty fortunate in our financial position. We are really pushing our mortgage overpayments so we try and budget for £200 a week for food and bits etc. Tbf we manage it pretty well, including decent fruit and veg (the money pit!!). If I had £350, I'd be laughing!! I wonder why your wife feels like she must have more? I'd never ask my in laws for money and we have a really good relationship...

I have about £50 a week to live off (after bills, food, gym membership), £20 of that goes into savings for emergencies. Some weeks I may have a little more and other weeks a little less. Would love £350 a week 🤣🤣🤣

Why on earth would you pay out for a holiday with your savings if you are seriously worried about money?To ask for help when you are still paying for holidays and dinning out is really weird. I don't quite know what you are thinking

OP your DW sounds entitled. Personally I think you should challenge her to start budgeting for disposable income of £150 pw and then she may see the error of her ways...

I would be utterly mortified to ask family for help whilst still taking holidays!
I know it can be a culture shock changing your outgoings to meet a new, reduced budget, but you cannot make that your parents burden.
God help you both of the sh*t ever hit the fan and you really had to survive on a genuinely low income. £350 a week is immensely doable, just sort your priorities out and teach your children (and wife!) how to be financially responsible. The kids, at least, will thank you for it in the long run. Especially when they have the life skills to manage their money and never have that horrid sinking feeling of worrying about money.

Agree with colchester that seeing your parents fortnightly is probably plenty, not going on holiday with them probably isn't uncommon and if your DC are teens surely they don't want sleepovers at the gps?

I brought 2 kids up alone on less than that and paid a mortgage, and we aren't talking that long ago! I'm still bringing up one child alone and don't earn 2/3's of your leftover cash.
£1400 after paying all bills should be plenty and no, I don't think you should be asking your parents for money. That's pennies short of £50 a day! Shocking if you can't live well on that and sort your debt. Pull your belts in and apply for a 0% credit card transfer. I got a Santander one recently.
Is your wife extravagant? How she can consider going cap in hand to her in-laws whom she has a 'frosty relationship' with leaves me speechless.

That's plenty. You should be able to put a lot aside with that disposable income and reduce your debt. We keep a family of four on around half that after bills. Don't ask your family for money. Maybe instead you should budget

We are a family of 5 living in London. I would say £350 a week is doable. Get rid of the credit card debt and you will have more money, but really need to have some money management. We get a take out maybe every other week, make large meals to take to work and kids have packed lunches. Our car gets by and our kids are active.

Instead of asking parents for money, I think you need to have a chat with wife with some serious financial discussions and resetting of boundaries regarding your parents and how they are treated.

I think your wife sounds like an ungrateful cow. But surely you should demand that your parents see your children especially as they are so good at helping out financially.
What you have left is more than adequate. Maybe look for someone new

Grow up stop sponging off your parents and let your kids have a normal relationship with them that dosnt involve money. Being Materialistic is a ugly trait. And for the record your fella sounds a right knob letting your parents fund his family.

You have more than enough, what do you spend it on?

Sounds alright to me.

Your description of your parent's role in your lives made me feel sad.

DW sounds like a greedy CF. That is more than enough. Get out of debt as a priority.
I agree with Bedraggled, your description of your parent's role in your lives is very sad indeed. My children's lives are richer for having a close loving relationship with both sets of grandparents.

You have a spare £1.4k a month for food and outings?? Consider yourself very lucky!!!

Op we have similar circumstance. After food and petrol there really isn't a lot left. Almost every month three seems to be a birthday or big bill like Mot Christmas, school uniform etc. I think that if you're used to more adapting to less is hard. But I wouldn't be asking for help with that much spare income except maybe the odd big bill came up

Why use savings to pay for a holiday if you have debt....I’d have cleared that first .....

The key issue here is that it’s only ok to ask for financial help if you are struggling with the core necessities, so food/mortgage etc. Hard to imagine asking for financial help because you’d like to eat out in restaurants more....

Am I sensing that your DW wants to spend more then this, and expects you to ask (sponge off) your parents just because they are well off?

Tell her that you need to live withing your means. Like everyone else.

You do not have a money problem - you have a wife problem!!!

We are trying to pay off credit cards and aren’t managing to live on £200 per week for food and fuel - so £200 after all bills. It’s meant to be £180 but we are quite relaxed with it as we’re doing this through choice rather than having to. We do have another wage coming in over and above this money. We manage at least one (usually two) takeaways on this amount.

are managing* not aren’t

£350 per week disposable is very very comfortable in my opinion.

I think it's quite cheeky she thinks you should ask your parents for help... given her frosty relationship with them.

To me if parents are able to help there off spring it should really only be if they are really struggling or if they choose to.

£350 a week... that's more than a weekly wage to a lot of people who have to pay bills etc..

What does she need £350 topping up for and how much more off your parents would she expect?