To allow my 10 yr old DS cook dinner every day

[NobbyD]

DS is 10 and massively into cooking. He pretty much thinks, reads and watches everything there is to know about cooking, baking and cuisine. He's a little chef in the making.

He started cooking dinners once a week for us, then got the buzz and now pretty much plans our weekly meals using recipes from Jamie Oliver, Gordon Ramsey and the like. He makes breakfast and dinner every single day. And I'm not talking bung in the oven, or jar stuff. He'll cook risottos, seafood pasta, curries, and especially likes cooking fish and seafood with an array of veg. His ultimate day out is going to the fishmonger, choosing a fish he's not heard of and then finding a recipe, then going to a greengrocer for organic veg and then cooking it. He's honestly amazing! And I've even now got him washing up before and after.

My question is, should I allow him to cook every day? I've been told that I shouldn't let my 10yr old cook for me everyday. That it could be dangerous for 10yr old to be using the oven, the hobs, grill, etc etc. That I'm the mother, I should be cooking for him or at least with him (he doesn't want me in the kitchen, he hates it if I look over him but I am supervising from the other room where I can see him). But tbh, he's better than me. His meals are nutritious, cooked from scratch, and balanced (nothing that I could achieve). But I've been told that like any hobby/obsession, there needs to be a balance. He needs to find other interests. He's only 10!

He plays football for a team too. He also has a younger brother, 6, who is disabled. So his cooking time is when he gets to relax and do something he loves away from his very demanding brother. I've even woken up of a weekend and DS1 is making cakes with DS2 at 7.30am letting his little bro stir the mix!!

I'm trying to find him a culinary school but all the ones for kids are basic stuff like pizza making, which is so below his standard he'd be bored, and all the ones he would like to do are for adults only.

AIBU to allow him to indulge in his cooking obsession at 10 or should I fully embrace this and be grateful I have DS who is smart, talented, and wants to cook for the family?

@sashh @clairemcnam I looked into junior masterchef but can't see it in this country anymore. And I did apply for him to go on a new ITV cooking show for kids, but didn't get a reply even with pictures of his amazing dinners... shame. I'll keep searching.

If you are anywhere near London, Billingsgate market does tours and fish cookery courses.
You can also visit independently as a member of the public.

S1naidSucks Yes, good idea re budget. He gets pocket money each week and it goes on a Go Henry card. He often uses that if he wants to buy a particularly expensive fish - he saved up £11 to buy some monkfish the other day... so he's getting there with budgeting for expensive stuff :)

@Weedsneeds1 Oooo! We are in east London and we went to Borough market of a weekend once. Trouble was I took the DS2 and it was too much for him. But I'll def look into Billingsgate. Thank you

Wow he sounds amazing!! If he loves it what harm is there in letting him. If you want to be involved for safety reasons maybe you could phrase it like " DS can you teach me you're so brilliant or let's pretend you're on a cooking show talk me through what you're doing?"

he saved up £11 to buy some monkfish the other day...

Mind truly boggled. He is a very unique dc and also very very funny.

Who is this person constantly telling you all this is a bad thing? He sounds great and a very kind brother too

You have to go really early for Billingsgate actual market, but some courses are evening or afternoon. Might not be one for DS2.
Other London market that used to be great ( not lived n London for a while) is Walthamstow. There's the market itself and also lots of independent shops, including fishmongers and a Turkish shop.
Actually, I bet he'd love TFC. They have several stores and I'm sure there are some East London ones. They have amazing fruit, veg, bread, olives etc.

Definitely let him indulge as he is enjoying it - and I assume you like the results = win, win.

He sounds amazing. Does he go out with his friends at all? Do they come over for dinner?

My DS was the same when he was around 9-10. He loves to eat and loves to cook. He would make the most amazing meals and really enjoy doing it. He once cooked a 3 course dinner from scratch for 5 people! We massively encouraged him, took him to fancy restaurants and on his 10th birthday we took him for lunch at Le Manoir aux qat saison and he met Raymond Blanc who gave him a signed book and a personal tour of his kitchens.

Roll on 6 years and whilst he still likes to eat well he doesn't cook at all unless it's a 5 minute meal after a gym session. He has no interest in pursuing a career in food. He is however, due to his great cooking skills, going to be the best fed person in Halls when he starts uni in September no pot noodles for him.

So just encourage and facilitate and see where, if anywhere, it goes.

I think it's lovely you're nurturing his passion op. It sounds like you have a little Jamie Oliver in the making.

Oh, and See Woo at Charlton, Chinese cash and carry, but again can go as member of the public to buy.
They have exotic fruit and veg, tanks of live fish...

@nokidshere WOW! DS would love to meet Raymond Blanc. He turns 11 in July, and I'm now going to look into booking a table somewhere fancy for him. We went out for dinner the other day - only Pizza Express but still - and he ordered the pesto seabass. He loved it and got a few eyebrow raises from the waiting staff that he'd ordered the very "adult" thing on the menu. He then wrote down the list of ingredients and is going to re make it himself at home. He's also made a two course sunday dinner for us, his grandparents and my sister and her kids.

I do hope the passion for it doesnt dwindle, which is why I'm allowing the every day thing now. If anything though, this is a huge life skill for him. And he'll make a fantastic partner for someone one day

@Weedsnseeds1 - amazing stuff! Thank you for all those recs, I'll make a list for him!

He's happy your happy ignore what other people might think.. If safety is something you genuinely are worried about, go through health and safety In the kitchen or take him on a course for food handling he will be able to pick up good practice from this.

Also have a camera from amazon so you can see him from your phone etc and able to check up on him.

I'm sure he would tell you when he wants s break from it.

His social skills aren't great tbh. He's always been shy. He finds it hard to make new friends. He's always had a hobby that is a single-person hobby. He does however play football after school and for a team at weekends, so there is that.

How much does he interact with his team-mates off the pitch? The games themselves don't involve any but the most basic social skills so, unless he interacts much off the pitch, that's not necessarily going to help him much.

It's awesome that he's got such a deep interest and is probably quite talented in this area but he might have a better teenage experience if you can expand his interests a little and help him to build some friendships with like-minded peers.

I know this is really difficult because my 16YO DD has ASD and would much prefer to be doing homework than spending time around other teens. However, she would like to go to university and that will be easier for her if she can build some supportive peer relationships.

I wouldn't be the slightest bit concerned about him using knives and ovens, etc but I agree that there needs to be some balance. Your role might be to help him, in a very gentle way, to achieve this so he has the skills to build friendships when he feels ready.

Let him. Obviously don't force him to cook but it's far better than watching tv, playing video games etc. Ensure he knows how to use the equipment and I wouldn't allow deep frying

He sounds great OP. Did you know that Treadwells in Central London does a kids tasting menu? It’s not crazy priced and you get a proper dining experience. I took my 8 year old who loved being in a “proper” restaurant and trying different things. It’s not quite Raymond Blanc but good for a special but not astronomically priced meal out.

Sorry, Tredwells not Tread.

I'm a chef and your son sounds great.

Do you have a garden or any outdoor space or even a windowsill as he could grow his his own herbs - still culinary related but something else to interest him perhaps.

Ship him off to Australia, I would love to have him.

Let him keep doing it as long as he loves to, as soon as he;s had enough, no pressure.

Clearly a chef in the making, go with it. Maybe not every day though. Apart from anything else, if you get out of the habit of cooking yourself, your skills will drop. He shouldn’t be washing up too.

Ps my dd could cook family meals by the time she went to secondary, said she wanted to be a chef .. until she was 15 and changed her mind, she's an engineer