To tell you all about my morning poo?

[myuncomfypoo]

Name change because ya know......

I am not bunged up or anything and eat loads of fibre, fruit and veg etc
But........
This morning I had the most uncomfortable 💩 in my life

I was sitting on the loo and I swear it was like birthing a baby just from the other area. It must have been (or felt like) twice the size of the opening.

I started pushing and thought to myself ' do I really want to push this sucker out?' It was hard and uncomfortable and wide ( auto correct wanted me to type unconstitutional 😂😂) but decided that it's better out than in. So I pushed away until it came it. It was huge with a bit of fresh blood. My word I hope that never happens again.
I can't mention this to dp or ds ( even though at 6 ds finds 💩 and anything to do with 💩 hilarious) as I want him to have good habits. He has already thought dd2 to say 'bum bum' and that's bad enough. I never have anything to post on AIBU so just thought id share this with all you nice people on MN 😉🙂
Thanks for reading.

@llamawearingasombrero & @rachb2019 the term is stage fright isn't it 🤔 😂

Oh god I love the relief of a good poop, but I had a horror this morning too. I kept going dizzy and wanted to cry!

@fblake Exactly - stage fright. If you get it, nothing happens no matter how much you need to go!

Still working out the resistant poo troll???? What does that mean?

A patient at work once shat out a solid poo the size of half a French stick, at least a foot long, oh how we laughed (we deal with a lot of poo, it comes in lots of different varieties, but never before or since have I seen one as large as "The Baguette")

I did one of these in a pub toilet once when I was seven months pregnant and had been constipated for a week. Had to dash in off the street because I couldn’t hold it in.

Of course it wouldn’t flush so I had to just leave it there and do a runner.

I’m really sorry to whoever had to deal with that when they discovered it

I hate sound a 💩 at my parents place. They have a old toilet and the backsplash is cold 😂😂 they are also a tad skanky in that they don't put the lid down when flushing and complain if the lid is left down instead of up

@DuffBeer 😲😬 maybe disinfect your cutlery and drawer?

Eat the skins of kiwi fruit, fresh figs and apricots ( but not all together of course) that'll keep you moving 😁

Last year I caught a d&v bug from ds that he got from the germ factory (aka school)
It was like mount Vesuvius all night. Damn nasty 😷

Make some granola with lots of nuts. That sucker will just slide out.