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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To ask for hilariously crap excuses you’ve been given?

275 replies

MatildaTheCat · 03/05/2019 18:54

I will start with one I recently received.

I have an old school friend who I have very sporadic contact with via email. When I contacted her for a catch up recently I made some reference to ‘we must get together some time,’ as you do.

She emailed me back a few days later with her news but added that she couldn’t commit to getting together this year because last year a pipe in her (adult) daughter’s bedroom had leaked and she needed to decorate her room. She doesn’t have a job or any dependent children just to be clear. Hmm

If she’d ignored that comment although or said she was up to her eyes in it OR even said ‘not really into meeting up’ I wouldn’t have cared at all.

It made me laugh anyway. So what totally silly excuses have you been offered?

OP posts:
Arrowfanatic · 08/05/2019 09:28

I was a team leader in a bank call centre and we had one employee go for lunch and just not come back and we couldnt get hold of him.

He comes in the next day, seems a bit worse for wear. I have a meeting with him to ask what happened. Apparently he was in the kitchen at his mums house (where he lived) and whilst there his mum had a new carpet fitted in the lounge & he wasnt allowed to walk on it for the rest of the day and so was stuck in the kitchen.

Arrowfanatic · 08/05/2019 09:29

I'm sure it was nothing to do with it being a bright and sunny day and he preferred to sit in the beer garden he was seen at by a fellow team leader as i was informed of BEFORE the meeting. I just wanted to know what his excuse would be Grin

kshaw · 08/05/2019 09:33

Someone I thought was a good friend isn't coming to my wedding as 'there may be traffic'....I'd rather her just say she doesn't want to come for whatever reason. Or not give a reason. No is a complete answer after all ha

Lweji · 08/05/2019 09:45

Some people aren't comfortable driving to new places or motorways or even heavy traffic. Is it possible she has some anxiety regarding driving but hasn't mentioned it?

RelaisBlu · 08/05/2019 10:01

Arrowfanatic did you fire him?

Omzlas · 08/05/2019 10:03

A 'friend' couldn't attend my wedding because he was going out the night before and knew he'd be hungover

My gran (!) couldn't come and visit me at home after emergency surgery, despite her crying down the phone at me because she "desperately wanted to see me and make sure I was ok" and also "to help in whatever way she could", because she parked her car to hold a parking space for my uncle. My uncle had nipped out for bread & milk and thinks he's the Lord of their estate (read: demands he gets the closest parking spot) but she offered to hold his space, he didn't ask. I've never forgiven her for that.

Mayalready · 08/05/2019 10:15

My dgm wouldn't come to my wedding as my aunt (her dd) said it wouldn't be fair as she couldn't come as she didn't want people to know she had a wheelchair now. Dgm felt too guilty to attend.
Was gutted .

Loyaultemelie · 08/05/2019 11:39

I needn't laugh because we once had to cancel Dd1s ice skating lesson because we had hens stuck in the workings of the sofa Blush

kshaw · 08/05/2019 16:28

@lweji she drives the same route basically to and from work. Who knows. Have a feeling maybe some anxiety going on but no idea!

Winterfellismyhome · 08/05/2019 20:03

I was acting manager for a shop one Sunday and we usually had young staff. My colleague came in with a note from his mum that said he needed to leave early because he had a lot of A level coursework Hmm

BlueJava · 08/05/2019 20:39

When my sons were much younger the curtain pole fell down in their room. Neither would own up to swinging on it. I sat them both down and onw came up with "Father Christmas missed the chimney and came theough the window and had the curtain down". When insaid it was October they insisted it happened last December and i hadnt noticed.

mineofuselessinformation · 08/05/2019 20:51

A student hadn't done their homework because the entire family had been up all night trying to catch a mouse...,

GETTINGLIKEMYMOTHER · 08/05/2019 20:55

An ex colleague was often late for work. The 'best' excuse she ever came up with was that her new breakfast cereal was chewier than her usual one, so it had taken her a long time to eat it. 😄

GlitterPixie · 08/05/2019 21:02

The hamster having a lie in and and no place to put the neighbors key are cracking me up

GlitterPixie · 08/05/2019 21:05

And the chewy cereal Grin

theworldistoosmall · 08/05/2019 21:16

These are awesome. Keep them coming.

cortex10 · 08/05/2019 21:37

DF wouldn't come to my Masters graduation because it meant staying overnight in London and he didn't want to leave their (small well behaved) dog with anyone else. MIL came instead.

Hanumantelpiece · 08/05/2019 22:52

Possibly outing so I may need to namechange after this - a friend of mine was forever giving excuses as to why her homework hadn't been handed in on time. One day she came in and said that she had done it, but that the ceiling in her bedroom had fallen in and ruined everything in the room. Teacher gave her short shrift & a detention. Needless to say this was the one time she hadn't made it up.

Mayalready · 08/05/2019 23:14

My ds is a chef and the young chef under him asked to leave early one shift as his dm had finished his ironing and he had to get home and put it away!

Netflixandchilll · 08/05/2019 23:15

Very pathetic excuse. Parent late picking up child

“The traffic was bad”

From Mcr to liverpool.. at 6pm.. groundbreaking.

VanGoghsDog · 08/05/2019 23:15

Someone who reports to me at work told me she had to go home because "something has happened".

What, I ask.

Something.

FFS! She sounded like a three year old.

preggohelp · 09/05/2019 07:46

A work colleague once came in late because her hair bobble had broken and she didn't have another one

AnnaSteen · 09/05/2019 07:58

I ordered a boiled egg and toast for breakfast in a cafe in France and it came out cold. I said the egg is freezing can you bring a hot one and was told that ‘they make boiled eggs cold in france’ I asked how they managed this given the process to make a boiled egg can only be achieved by boiling it ....

Beaniebeemer · 09/05/2019 14:24

My work colleague who is a renowned PTA phoned me once saying that she wasn’t coming in as it was raining and her windscreen wipers probably couldn’t cope with the amount of water that was coming down Hmm

viques · 09/05/2019 20:30

A very senior member of staffs [ ok, she was the deputy] post graduate child was filling in as a [not very good] TA for a few weeks.

I drew the short straw and had them as my playground duty partner. After the third time I found myself alone in the playground supervising several hundred children I spoke to them and said if they couldn't do their duty time then it was their responsibility to swap with someone and to let me know.

The next time I got a note, an actual note, not from the TA, but from their mother .

" X can't do their playground duty on Tuesday"

I pinned it up on the notice board in my room .

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