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Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To have lost all respect for PIL

138 replies

stressedandwhat · 02/05/2019 22:51

Please help I really don't know whether I am being over the top about this. Sorry it's so long...

I am 6 months pregnant so maybe hormones are having an impact on this I don't know.

I have been with DP for 6 years. He is five years older than me. His parents are different to mine which is fine. They just have very different political beliefs. As I do to them. My family have always been very left wing. His family are quite strongly right wing. For example they are extremely pro brexit and openly disapproving about a lot of immigrants. I've always found this difficult to hear however I have tried to build relationships on the basis that they are DPs family and we are all entitled to our own views.

The problem comes from this.

I have recently found out that PIL grow weed in their home and sell it. Have been doing so for at least a few years. This has stressed me out but I do not know if I'm overreacting or not.

Their reasons for this is that they were making a loss on a few buy to let flats they have in a nearby town and were worried about their pension pot - I find this irritating as they aren't hard up and they aren't exactly on the breadline even if they aren't minted

They are cruel when they speak people on benefits but I find this hypocritical since they are essentially cheating the tax system

The problem is they have such a close relationship with BILs children and have helped with raising them loads but I just feel like I don't want them involved loads as I don't trust their judgment and I don't want my child exposed to risky environments.

Am I awful? I don't know please help Confused

OP posts:
MouseMartin · 05/05/2019 17:26

I would be more concerned about the morality (or lack of it) of being involved in Buy to Let.

TheUser420 · 07/05/2019 11:01

Does anyone know if cannabis has changed over the years?

"Know", or "has an anecdote about" ? Two different things.

With the understanding that there's no real point in discussing street drugs (since dealers will sell whatever they can get away with - a lot of "cannabis" stories are actually about "substance X" anyway) then the answer is ... it depends.

Have you ever been to a pyschiatric hospital? If you have you will know that most of the ppl there who have not got an existing mental illness are there because they have had drug induced pyschotic episodes.

But was that "cannabis" or "traces of cannabis + substance X" ?

The drive for "bangs per buck" max-THC/min-CBD cannabis was driven by the fact it's illegal. Much like methanol made it's way into drinks under prohibition.

"Dump the dealer" is why the UK has a flourishing (blooming, actually Grin) home growing sub culture that is producing some of the best quality cannabis in the world. Plus expertise in breeding that is pretty much second to none. Certainly enough to support a thriving hydroponics supplies industry (operating out of an industrial unit near you).

All of that said, the OPs PiL are knobs of the highest order, and frankly an embarrassment to the community.

10% of users develop psychosis?! Do they fuck. Do you actually think it would have been legalised if that were true?

Tabloid "facts".

Nanny0gg · 07/05/2019 11:08

@MouseMartin
I would be more concerned about the morality (or lack of it) of being involved in Buy to Let.

Eh?

TheUser420 · 10/05/2019 09:20

caught this, and though of you Grin ... maybe the PiLs are trailblazers ... or given the state of their electrics, some sort of -blazers Hmm

www.cityam.com/277194/green-rush-uks-cannabis-industry-reaching-dizzying-new

cityam.com
The green rush? The UK’s cannabis industry is reaching dizzying new highs
Hannah Simon
4-5 minutes

Predicting the emergence of the UK’s next billion-pound industry is the dream of any investor.

Yet what if, unbeknown to many of its citizens, the UK were already competing as a global leader in that market?

When it comes to the burgeoning legal cannabis market, this is already the reality. According to the UN’s International Narcotics Control Board, the UK is one of the largest legal cannabis producers in the world

In 2016 alone, the UK’s production doubled to 95 tonnes, making it responsible for growing nearly half of the world’s legal cannabis. In 2017, it was responsible for 69 per cent of global exports, with the majority going directly to the US.

While the focus of the commercial conversation so far has largely centred on developments in North America, in Britain the domestic discourse has surrounded local patients, personal stories, and the lack of infrastructure regionwide. Yet behind the scenes, the UK has stayed busy, becoming one of the world’s largest producers and exporters of medical cannabis.

Since 2000, the “green rush” has led to political developments and a shift in mainstream discourse around cannabis, with more and more European countries developing medical programmes and establishing prosperous industries in the process.

According to the consultancy Prohibition Partners, the European cannabis market could be worth in excess of £100bn by 2028. That’s more than twice the revenues that Apple reported in the region last year.

Unsurprisingly, things are moving quickly. The campaigns of patients like Alfie Dingley and Billy Caldwell helped make history in the UK, with Dingley receiving the first legal cannabis prescription in Britain in November 2018, when the Home Office introduced new legislation which would make medical cannabis legal – much sooner than many analysts had anticipated.

In the wake of this, the first medical cannabis clinics in the UK have been opened to assist patients with chronic conditions, with two more due to open before the end of the year in Birmingham and London.

From an investment perspective, the positive domestic media attention, a growing global shift in attitudes, and the increasing number of countries moving towards legalisation of medical cannabis are opening the door for a few UK companies to float on London’s public exchanges.

Already they are attracting buoyant backing from fund managers, institutional investors and more recently state investment funds.

Navigating the cannabis market does have its complexities. High street stockists, such as Holland and Barrett, have been successful in promoting CBD ranges, as consumers have shown a sky-rocketing interest in CBD products, from lip balms to snack bars. However, the CBD market remains in a legal grey area, with regulators playing catch up to the innovation of the private sector.

This is just one of the developments that global players in the market will be discussing when they descend on London on 18 May for the Women, CBD & Medical Cannabis Conference.

Why the gender angle? This is a new industry that really works to understand female consumers – a demographic that virtually doubled in the US in 2018 – and is leading in terms of its practices around sustainability and equal opportunities.

Female empowerment in the fast-emerging global medical cannabis business has become a big theme in 2019, and the number of women in leadership positions continues to consistently outstrip the national average.

As Britain’s medical cannabis regulations undergo further reform, I am excited about the opportunities. There have been recent calls in the European Parliament to create a region-wide resolution on medical cannabis, while the UN has released positive findings from studies on both CBD and THC.

Change is in the air. It’s an exciting time to be in this industry – for me personally, and for the UK as a whole.

City A.M.'s opinion pages are a place for thought-provoking views and debate. These views are not necessarily shared by City A.M.

Aquilla · 10/05/2019 10:05

Sorry op, but they just don't sound terribly... er... 'conservative'!

TheUser420 · 10/05/2019 10:16

Sorry op, but they just don't sound terribly... er... 'conservative'!

Surely there's nothing more conservative (sorry Conservative) than massive hypocrisy ? It's on the first page of the membership pack.

IWannaSeeHowItEnds · 10/05/2019 10:20

I think this thread is a crock of shit - racist, Brexit voting, tax dodging etc. All the hallmarks of a gf thread!

But on the off chance you are real, do not ring the police unless you want to lose your dp. He will choose them over you, if you do this and he will know it's you. This is not something you do to a man you profess to love!

I also think anonymous grassing over something that doesn't affect you and is legal in lots of countries is cowardly behaviour. If you want to report it, own your actions.

You are not obliged to like your ILs. Possibly they don't rate you too highly either, but unless they are harming you, most people tolerate each other for the sake of the the people that they all love.

TheUser420 · 10/05/2019 10:28

he will know it's you.

Why ? From the sounds of it, the OPs PiL have told all and sundry anyway. And if they are bypassing the meter and growing without filters and selling to dealers* then half the local scallies will know. If the OP does report them, she might be doing them a favour. Better a genteel entry with a warrant than a less genteel one with sledgehammers and machetes.

Apparently the Home Office has been bollocking the police "insisting" they enforce the law over cannabis. But until they can be bothered to pay for that too, it's unlikely to happen. So an easy bust like the OPs PiL could be welcome. Especially if it gets in the papers and we have a chance to see a "sophisticated set up" with "lights" and "things" and a couple of coppers grinning in the middle of the most pathetic crop of plants you ever did see.

*- the three rules of home growing for personal use are "Dont' sell, don't tell, don't smell", along with "only break one law at a time". The OPs PiL seem to have managed a clean sweep Grin

IWannaSeeHowItEnds · 10/05/2019 11:18

Of course he'll know. The OP just finds out and lo and behold the police turn up!

If he asks her outright, is she going to lie to him and deny it?
There have been numerous occasions where authorities have accidentally released information to the wrong people - you see it on MN all the time where victims of abuse have had their addresses sent to the estranged husband for example. If OP is going to do this and lie, she's depending upon other people not to accidentally drop her in it.

Usually the truth comes out. Does she hate her ILs enough to trash her own relationship with do?

StreetDreams · 10/05/2019 12:59

Well, I have an opinion about all this, but every thread I've posted on in the last 48 hours has been yanked while Mumsnet 'take a closer look behind the scenes'. So I'll keep my opinion to myself, I think, OP, so as not to jinx your thread. Good luck with your Brexit-voting, drug dealing, buy-to-let landlord PILs. They sound incredibly awful.

stressedandwhat · 12/05/2019 10:58

Thank you so much for all your replies sorry we were away for the weekend and I hadn't seen the more recent responses.

To those doubting if this is real sadly it is - I wish it wasn't!

I have spoken more with DP. He says he couldn't be involved with reporting which I understand. He also said if I want to he wouldn't stand in my way and it wouldn't change our relationship Confused. I think he is being naive and it obviously would as he would be devastated to see his parents in trouble and the effects on the rest of the family. I would not report behind his back no.

We have reached a decision. I am not going to report and if they get caught another way then that's their problem. DP will continue to go to the house occasionally but I will not nor will DC. Too much to risk by being there. They can see DC at our house or on days out. We will not be holidaying with them.

In terms of all the vile views language etc we can't stop what they think but DP will speak to them and tell them absolutely not in front of DC. If they don't respect this then they won't be seeing them.

I'm not sure what the right answer is but we are going to distance ourselves and hope it helps. If they do ever get caught they won't be getting any sympathy from us.

Thanks again for all the replies it's been so helpful to talk this through with people.

OP posts:
Jiggles101 · 12/05/2019 11:38

I think it's definitely the right decision not to tell, not sure what that would achieve really.

Entirely your prerogative not to spend time with them though, they sound like shitty people.

stressedandwhat · 12/05/2019 12:10

@Jiggles101 thank you for your input yes I agree my gut reaction was they shouldn't get away with it but it would hurt people I love who have done nothing wrong as much as them.

OP posts:
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