The Ten White Horsemen Of The Apocalypse Wedding Part 2

[jessicawessica]

I've never had to start a second thread so no idea if I've done this right.
I couldn't resist the title.

The poor mum.

I know

I just thought of something. Originally @jessicawessica you would not yet have been back from holiday but you altered that so that you would be back for the wedding. And DN was fine with you doing that even though you were only invited to the evening. Sure, of course he was okay with it, he was expecting you to be driving your DM!! He let you amend your holiday to chauffeur for his wedding! What a self important dick.

I also can't get over them chatting away to your 11 yo DD all the while knowing she would never see it. That surely crosses the line from thoughtless to cruel. I imagine at some point DD said something that indicated that she thought she was going? Giving DN or his fiancée a chance to manage expectations then. The kinder thing to do.

OP, I think this is dreadful behaviour demonstrated by your DN and his fiancée.

However, I am still gasping at the fact that your DB1 offered them £000's for either a house deposit or a wedding and they chose the wedding which is costing a packet and having 10 groomsmen. 🙄

To make matters worse, they don't even have a rented home of their own and live with DN's mum even though they also now have a child. Now you say DN is a member of a golf club! Hardly a cheap pastime.

Pair of twopenny millionaires!! 😂😂😂. This marriage has very little chance of lasting long IMO as everything is for show and well beyond what they can genuinely afford.

I’m enjoying jessica’s updates and hope this thread goes strong to the wedding and its aftermath.

Me too , this is a good thread. I am keen to see how things work out for Jessica and family.

How long have DN and the bride been together?

Should add EX H only invited to evening do....so no better than me Ha!

So the latest ‘big reveal’ on this thread is belatedly clarified as follows: someone the groom thought of as an uncle until a minimum of 11 years ago (based on the age of the youngest daughter) AND whom he now sees socially got an invite to the evening do. Not quite as earth-shattering as suggested.

I think that generally most nieces and nephews don’t feel nearly as attached to the aunts and uncles as the aunts and uncles feel attached to them and believe that feeling is reciprocated.

Yes I agree with that for the most part. In 20, 30, maybe even 40 years time they will understand. Some people like the nephew won’t even do so. He sounds shallow and lacking empathy.

StillCoughing
I didn’t think it was a big reveal tbh.

Who suggested it was earth shattering?

I possibly over-reacted to the ex DH reveal because I mistakenly thought that OP said he was invited to the whole day.

Why would people post on thread to criticise it? And as for telling the OP to pack it in - just beggars belief.

Who put you in charge?

Just move along.

Sad.

Anyone who has ten groomsmen in white has no class or is possibly American. Your DN definitely has no class. I think you're doing the right thing distancing yourself from him.

I've read both threads and my jaw is still on the floor about it all.

@jessicawessica - you've said that DB1 who is father of the groom here thinks he shouldn't get involved, that he thinks it's not his place to...he's footing the bill. Shouldn't he have said to his son "I'm giving you x amount for the wedding, and you're to invite our family (1 table) to it." Actually, come to think of it, why couldn't your DB1 just pay for another table of guests at the wedding and have you all at it? He's bankrolling the debacle, sorry wedding, why shouldn't he put his foot down?

Do let us all know how things go!!

Actually, come to think of it, why couldn't your DB1 just pay for another table of guests at the wedding and have you all at it?

My aunt offered to do that for my cousin's wedding as he'd invited some aunts and uncles to the full wedding and others to the evening. He refused as his wedding, his choice. It caused some upset relatives, including his mother who was really upset that her brothers and sisters weren't all invited.

I may have inadvertently caused a rift in my family at my wedding. Invited DU and DA but none of their children. Invited DCous1 and DC2 and their DF (DM had passed away). I'm friends with DCous1 & 2 and have seen them/socialised with them over time. Never ever see the DCous I didn't invite. All on my Dad's side so they would all know.

But I didn't see them every Sunday for dinner and then snub them!

Weddings can show you people's true colours so being the dignified one is really important. Maintain the moral high ground in public but have a good old rant on here!

You must find a way to get hold of photos from someone who does go, though.

I don't think that will be hard at all, sounds very much a show wedding, so wouldn't be surprised if it's plastered all over instagram from the get go, the first photo in the series will probably be the nephew posing outside in front of the matching white Lamborghini he will have hired to drive to the country club in.

I also think there will be a video of the 10 groomsmen either doing a dance routine or a lip sync, posted at some point as well.

I bet there will be a wishing well so they can gouge more money out of their guests.

Hang on so when your nephew presumed you would attend the evening do at 7pm he expected you earlier that day to drive your Mum 60 miles for a 12.30 ceremony. What were you meant to do in the meantime, hang around outside until 7pm to join the evening party or drive 60 miles back home for a few hours and then 60 miles back?!! The mind boggles.

Anyone who has ten groomsmen in white has no class or is possibly American.

But anyone who has a bi-furcated wedding, with A and B guest lists, especially with aunts and uncles on the B list is definitely not American. Not the done thing on this side of the pond at all.

But anyone who has a bi-furcated wedding, with A and B guest lists, especially with aunts and uncles on the B list is definitely not American. Not the done thing on this side of the pond at all.

True, but I'd let an American off for having a long line up of groomsmen and bridesmaids because it seems to be more the done thing in America? I've certainly seen wedding photos/videos of Americans getting hitched where there's loads. In the U.K. it's pretty much unheard of. A best man and maybe a few ushers, fair enough.

Oh, yes, definitely a lot of attendants, especially if the bride and groom are young and recently graduated from university with a large circle of friends. I was one of 11 bridesmaids at my brother's wedding many years ago. And there were an equal number of groomsmen. But they did not wear white. I live in the South and have been to many weddings over the years and have never seen groomsmen in white.

I will forever think of a shit two-tier wedding as a 'bi-ferk '. Thank you, Seneca.

True, but I'd let an American off for having a long line up of groomsmen and bridesmaids because it seems to be more the done thing in America?

I’d agree with this - my American SIL had 10 bridesmaids because she didn’t want to leave anyone important out and cause upset. To have 10 groomsmen and yet still not invite your aunt and uncle just shows you’re even more of a twat.