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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To smoke in my own garden

563 replies

LittleBear4 · 21/04/2019 16:54

I am a smoker. I smoke 10 fags a day and I'm not planning on giving it up yet (one day!).

In smoke in my garden, I've got two neighbours either side and one every time I'm smoking will come out and say 'it stinks out here' and will start to cough loudly.

It's really getting on my nerves, I can't move down the end of the garden because it's tiny and would make no difference at all but AIBU to hate the passive aggressive comments when I'm smoking in my garden?

OP posts:
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JassyRadlett · 21/04/2019 17:09

You’re doing something that decreases their enjoyment of their garden and home (If eg the weather is nice and they want to have the windows open).

They do something that decreases your enjoyment of the cigarette by making PA (but truthful) comments.

And you’re pissed off?

MaxNormal · 21/04/2019 17:10

Well it does stink. You're entitled to do it, unfortunately, but they're not obliged to like it.

RumpoleoftheBaileys · 21/04/2019 17:10

Smoking is disgusting. You clearly know this as you are doing it outside. YABU

TheOnlyLivingBoyInNewCross · 21/04/2019 17:11

You have the right to smoke in your garden; they have the right to talk in their garden.

Wolfiefan · 21/04/2019 17:13

It stinks and is likely wafting in through their doors and windows. Surely down the end of the garden would be even a tiny bit better. (And might make you reduce how much you smoke too! Wink)

ScabbyHorse · 21/04/2019 17:13

YANBU

Buddytheelf85 · 21/04/2019 17:14

Well, it’s your garden and smoking’s perfectly legal. But equally - it’s foul and I can see why it’s not very pleasant for them.

Why can’t you smoke inside your house where it won’t bother them? Is it possibly because you don’t want your house to smell disgusting? Because in that case you can probably understand where they’re coming from.

viques · 21/04/2019 17:15

If you gave up smoking and saved the money then one day you'd be able to move to a big detached house where no one could smell your smoke. Oh, just a minute .........

Disfordarkchocolate · 21/04/2019 17:15

You're not being unreasonable but I'd hate you being my neighbour.

C0untDucku1a · 21/04/2019 17:16

If hate to live next door to a smoker again. It always amazed me that every smoker firmly believes they dont stink.

Of course it is your right to smoke in your garden. But it will make being in their own gardens unpleasant for your neighbours.

Dippypippy1980 · 21/04/2019 17:16

I am weird - never smoked but quite like the smell on a summers day. What is wrong with me🤣🤣

It is very distinctive and I can smell it three gardens away. But it only lasts about ten minutes then it’s gone.

People need to get over themselves.

diddl · 21/04/2019 17:17

I doubt that you hate the comments as much as they hate the smell.

Why do you smoke in your garden & not the house?

PumpkinPiesInTheOven · 21/04/2019 17:17

Yabu she's not told you to stop. She can moan about the smell. It's her garden and she doesnt like it, if she cant dictate what you do why do you get to dictate how she talks aboiut your behaviour.

TSSDNCOP · 21/04/2019 17:17

I don’t see why you can’t go to the end of the garden even if it is small. It likely would make a difference and at least you’d look considerate and be out of ear shot.

shuthefrontdoor · 21/04/2019 17:17

My neighbours smoke weed. We just have to put up with it, just like your neighbour should. It does smell though

dreichuplands · 21/04/2019 17:17

Try smoking in your own house OP then others won't be impacted by the stink.

Prequelle · 21/04/2019 17:19

It's so anti-social as well as damaging to their health. It would annoy me that being in my garden could mean breathing in your second hand smoke, especially as I'm pregnant.

You also probably cant smell it as strongly as they do. when I lived next to a smoker I could smell it in my house if I had the window open. Its disgusting. And I'm an ex smoker so I know how hard it is.

Gizlotsmum · 21/04/2019 17:20

I've been that neighbour. Used to drive me mad. Knew they were perfectly within their rights to smoke but hated the smell in my house and garden. Would have loved them to move to the end of the garden or just to the other side away from my back door. I used to shut doors as I hated my house stinking if their smoke and unfortunately that was the way it blew. Would never ask them to stop but I didn't have to like it

PolarBearBubbles · 21/04/2019 17:20

I'd hate living next door to a smoker and it would make me want to avoid my garden, especially having my kids out there. Grim.

JacquesHammer · 21/04/2019 17:21

YABU - if you’ve got the right to smoke in your garden, they’ve got the right to make whatever comments they want in theirs.

Why don’t you smoke in your house?

LittleBear4 · 21/04/2019 17:21

I have children, I'm not smoking in my house.
It would make no difference smoking at the end of my garden, it's that small.
I'm not going to say why I smoke nor give reasons why I don't want to give up yet as that is personal.

OP posts:
Stormy76 · 21/04/2019 17:21

It’s your garden, smoke where you want, I smoke 3/4 a day and I do get a bit of coughing from the other side of the fence, I tend to smoke at the side of the house or up the back of the garden. I really couldn’t care less as to whether they like it or not, same as they don’t when they wake us up gardening on Sunday mornings. They are a nice couple though. To be honest there are so many people around by me smoking pot (which does stink and seems to linger) I am surprised they noticed!

Busholive · 21/04/2019 17:22

If you want to smoke, have the courage of your convictions and do it in your own home. If you’re not prepared to live with the stench, why should others?

THIS

Would you still do it if they had a breathing condition? For all you know they might. I'd hate to have someone else polluting the air in my garden.

SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius · 21/04/2019 17:22

You have every right to smoke in your garden, @LittleBear4, but equally your neighbours have every right to make comments in theirs.

I loathe the smell of cigarette smoke - my mother smoked like a outhouse my childhood, and still does - I remember asking her not to smoke in the car because it made me nauseous and gave me a headache, and she refused.

To this day, the smell of cigarette smoke makes me feel ill - which may be partly psychological, I am sure - because of having had to put up with it for so many years as a child - but I would hate it if I couldn’t sit in my own garden without having to smell fag smoke.

bigchris · 21/04/2019 17:23

Why is everyone sayimg smoke indoors! She might have kids ! Do what you like in your own garden op, your neighbours sound fucking rude

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