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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

My first CF thread 😱

251 replies

Donotunderstandmyhouse · 21/04/2019 12:57

Hi all!

I've read lots about cfers on here but now I think I actually have one?! Or maybe the heat and being 7 months pregnant is making me go mad ....

Anyway! Just had garden done last weekend so I'm enjoying it lots now it's hot :-) ddog is also enjoying the new sprinkler! Today we planned on having a bbq at about 3/4 with some family members coming round. Dh was just outside setting it all up (getting bbq out cleaning it etc).

Ndn (who I know enough to say hi to/take parcels in but that's about it) has just messaged me on fb to ask if we are having a bbq. I assumed she was asking because of washing or something so I said yes at about 3. She then replied asking if she could use it too as there garden is a state and they have no bbq? I said they were welcome to join us if she liked (they have always seemed nice and I'm up for making new friends!). Anyway she didn't respond at first but now she's messaged saying no thank you they are going to an Easter egg hunt later but if they could use it before they go at about 2 that would be great????

What on Earth?! I've just replied saying I don't think that will work for us (fave mumsnet phrase!) 😂 but Aibu to think she's a cf? Or am I just not being neighbourly?

OP posts:
Drum2018 · 21/04/2019 20:33

Don't think I I'd respond to that last message. She has some neck!

Sheldonoscopy · 21/04/2019 20:41

Jesus I’d hate neighbours like that. When I first moved in I was horrified that I could see my neighbours (half size fence) and one of their kids was always creepy staring over at us. Like not saying a word, just staring. Asking me to come over and play because I have a big garden. Honestly I know it’s not her fault but it drove me up the wall.

Fast forward 7 or 8years and they’re the nicest neighbours I could ask for. We’re not friends, but friendly. We look out for one another and take in each other’s parcels without getting in each other’s business. In fact last week he came over and busted the lock for me on my shed because I lost the key 🙈😂

I’d be horrified if they thought they could come over and use my stuff. I’d be putting serious boundaries and making it clear that no, you may not use our bbq, no we are not up for hosting you, no I do not want to be buddies, cordial suits me just fine!

Herland · 21/04/2019 20:42

Uch OP I'm a bit gutted. I'm an eternal optimist and I was hoping you'd be pals.

You guys could use my BBQ anytime.

SchadenfreudePersonified · 21/04/2019 20:42

dear god please do not attempt to fall out of the skylight

I'll think about it . . .

greenpop21 · 21/04/2019 20:43

The biggest CF ever!!! I'd move!

greenpop21 · 21/04/2019 20:48

Rod for your own back OP, step away or endure years of sharing your garden.

CanuckBC · 21/04/2019 20:48

This thread was fantastic! What CF! Their kids are starving as they didn’t eat much lunch in anticipation of the BBQ they invited themselves too! You said if they were there before 6 you may have some burgers for them. You weren’t expecting another two kids!!! Wow, just wow.

DanielRicciardosSmile · 21/04/2019 20:50

Oh I love a good CF story, even more when it's a bonkers CF, and this has been one of the best! Well done on your excellent CF-Handling perhaps you could hold a masterclass in here

On a linked note, I did once make vegetarian kebabs (or what passed for them anyway, basically just cherry tomatoes, button mushrooms and bits of red onion and yellow pepper). They were absolutely the last thing to get eaten and even then I think we were left with about 3/4 of them. Never bothered again.

ThePerturbedPenguin · 21/04/2019 20:53

Yes definitely don’t bother to reply! There’s nothing you could say that wouldn’t be awkward whilst asserting yourself! What a CF she is!!

MadeForThis · 21/04/2019 21:00

Don't reply. She's nuts.

Unless you ask her what's for dinner. You're getting peckish again 😂

BuzzPeakWankBobbly · 21/04/2019 21:01

"asked if you had a vegetarian kebab"

Perfection!

hippoherostandinghere · 21/04/2019 21:12

Good work OP, good work indeed. Now, you know what would complete this thread. A photo of your new garden. I really want to see it!

Myimaginarycathasfleas · 21/04/2019 21:33

Vegetarian kebab - cherry tomatoes, mushrooms, halloumi, red peppers threaded onto skewers, painted with butter. You're welcome.

LokiCat · 21/04/2019 21:33

@Donotunderstandmyhouse how dare you not have enough food after she turns up late with her whole family! 🤦🏻‍♀️😂

The cheek of her and the message she sent you after!!

Hilarious thread - I've been laughing all the way through! Thanks OP 😬😬

SaltedCaramelEverything · 21/04/2019 21:52

Oh yes PLEASE do engage more to see if there’s more CFery where today’s come from. You know you want to!

Imagine if she did go on to post what a PP said about NDN invited us to a bbq but hardly any food... then came across this thread... and tried to play you at your own game by being the biggest CF on purpose and you didn’t know and it becomes like a “they don’t know we know they know” friends style situation! Wow I’m really overinvested in this...

Good work OP

FaithInfinity · 21/04/2019 23:45

Yes veggie kebab to me would be chopped peppers, mushrooms and halloumi. It’s quite a lot of effort though!

I would be tempted to reply with a comment about last minute guests and declining to rush back to the shops on a hot bank holiday Sunday when heavily pregnant abd instead just not reply as pp suggest. There’s nothing you can say to this woman that is more effective than radio silence in this scenario.

Thank you OP, it’s been most entertaining!

YoThePussy · 21/04/2019 23:52

I would have jammed a turnip on a stick and handed it to the child wanting a vegetarian kebab. As for wanting an orange cordial, got to be a Fruit Shoot.

A Magnum you say OP, what flavour? I [heart] Magnums and have yet to have one this year.

YoThePussy · 21/04/2019 23:53

Ah bollocks MN doesn’t do hearts. I’ll take a Gin instead.

EL8888 · 21/04/2019 23:55

Phew! You have out manoeuvred her today. But you need to stay strong -lm sure she has more to come...

Dieu · 22/04/2019 00:14

I think it was lovely of you to invite her to your BBQ Smile

justilou1 · 22/04/2019 04:12

I have a feeling that you’re going to have to explain to these people that your place is neither a restaurant or a holiday resort for them to come and hang out at whenever the weather is nice because their garden isn’t set up for sunbathing, they don’t have a barbecue, they don’t have veggie kebabs or haven’t caterered for their relatives. They definitely think they’re onto a good thing...

dustarr73 · 22/04/2019 04:47

No wonder the people before you movedGrin

Happynow001 · 22/04/2019 06:48

What Drum2018 said: Don't think I I'd respond to that last message. She has some neck!
Totally agree! If she/her family are so very unabashed at their first CFery onslaught on you think how much worse it could get!! 😱

On that.. just warn DH so doesn't get caught on the back foot and get sucked in by them. Maybe the default for him is always telling them he'll need to check with you so they can't play one of you against the other! (I've read a few of these threads on MN!) thanks for the laughs OP - you're a really funny (as well as kind) person. 🌺

SchadenfreudePersonified · 22/04/2019 07:34

I would have jammed a turnip on a stick

Grin Grin Grin

PMSL!!!!!

PotterHead1985 · 22/04/2019 09:58

Grin at the turnip on a stick!!

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