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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

My first CF thread 😱

251 replies

Donotunderstandmyhouse · 21/04/2019 12:57

Hi all!

I've read lots about cfers on here but now I think I actually have one?! Or maybe the heat and being 7 months pregnant is making me go mad ....

Anyway! Just had garden done last weekend so I'm enjoying it lots now it's hot :-) ddog is also enjoying the new sprinkler! Today we planned on having a bbq at about 3/4 with some family members coming round. Dh was just outside setting it all up (getting bbq out cleaning it etc).

Ndn (who I know enough to say hi to/take parcels in but that's about it) has just messaged me on fb to ask if we are having a bbq. I assumed she was asking because of washing or something so I said yes at about 3. She then replied asking if she could use it too as there garden is a state and they have no bbq? I said they were welcome to join us if she liked (they have always seemed nice and I'm up for making new friends!). Anyway she didn't respond at first but now she's messaged saying no thank you they are going to an Easter egg hunt later but if they could use it before they go at about 2 that would be great????

What on Earth?! I've just replied saying I don't think that will work for us (fave mumsnet phrase!) 😂 but Aibu to think she's a cf? Or am I just not being neighbourly?

OP posts:
Tilikum · 21/04/2019 19:30

I don't think we will be best pals as I got a message about ten mins after they'd gone saying sorry they had dashed off but the kids were hungry as they hadn't had a big lunch to prepare for the bbq so hadn't had enough to eat?!

There are no words! The actual cheek of them!

Original poster
Donotunderstandmyhouse · 21/04/2019 19:31

@Raspberrytruffle yes it was all a bit awkward when they got here as I was trying to introduce them to my family but I only know the woman's name from the street fb group and I had no clue what the rest were called 🙈

DF has just announced that he once caught my mother hanging out of her skylight to clean some bird poo off of the roof tile so clearly it runs in the family!!!

OP posts:
SecretMillionaire · 21/04/2019 19:31

I have laughed out loud at this thread so much my DH has asked why I’m laughing. I feel certain that you will be creating a my second CF thread in the not too very distant future Grin

Original poster
Donotunderstandmyhouse · 21/04/2019 19:32

@SecretMillionaire is it bad I am tempted to engage with them more just to see the extent of the cf?? They have certainly made my afternoon more entertaining

OP posts:
Original poster
Donotunderstandmyhouse · 21/04/2019 19:35

I can also report that my offer of a blue wkd was turned down and the child asked for a orange cordial and mum said she was pleased we use filtered water as normal tap water hurts her throat. 🧐🧐🧐

OP posts:
screamifyouwant · 21/04/2019 19:35

Lol sounds like that last message she sent you like she thinks you are a cf for not leaving lots of food, how dare you Grin
Some people are so entitled it's funny .

SecretMillionaire · 21/04/2019 19:36

@Donotunderstandmyhouse it’s not bad at all if I was on maternity leave I’d probably do the same. I’d give her some brasso for her neck too 😂

Tilikum · 21/04/2019 19:38

Please do engage with them more. Pretend you're David Attenborough studying the lifestyle of an interesting type of penguin. Is your DH on board with beating back the CFness or is he going to be the weak link that will lead to them moving into your house while you're on holiday?

Original poster
Donotunderstandmyhouse · 21/04/2019 19:38

@screamifyouwant yes I did worry about that....god I hope she doesn't go round telling people in the street I invited her for a bbq then only fed her a few cold burgers and skanky sausages (just to note they were Aldi's finest 😛)

OP posts:
ContessaIsOnADietDammit · 21/04/2019 19:39

Grin nicely done! You may want to text back something like "Yes, I suppose it was inevitable that we'd run out as you were a bit of a last-minute addition! Never mind, nice of you to come round :)". Something like that anyway....

Original poster
Donotunderstandmyhouse · 21/04/2019 19:40

@Tilikum dh thinks I've gone mad. He has never really understood the mumsnet thing and is terrible at confrontation. We once were in a bar and he had a glass with lipstick on it. Rather than ask for a new glass he just drank out of the other side. He also once didn't get paid for two months for a job he did as he didn't want to bother anyone and thought the money might come through eventually 🙄🙄🙄🙄

OP posts:
Still18atheart · 21/04/2019 19:41

Your ndn is defo in the running for the MN award for CF of the year. Reckon she might win it tbh

DaffoDeffo · 21/04/2019 19:45

Omg the message about not eating much lunch to prepare for your bbq has had me laughing out loud! Vegetarian kebabs Grin!!!

Ihatehashtags · 21/04/2019 19:46

Wow I am stunned at her rudeness. She is not someone I’d want to be friends with.

Original poster
Donotunderstandmyhouse · 21/04/2019 19:46

@DaffoDeffo I probably shouldn't admit this but I don't even know what a vegetarian kebab is? Veg on a stick or tofu?

I am also suspicious about the small lunch thing as she first messaged me at around lunch time so surely they knew what they were doing for lunch at that point... possibly overthinking.

OP posts:
RedHatsDoNotSuitMe · 21/04/2019 19:47

the kids were hungry as they hadn't had a big lunch to prepare for the bbq so hadn't had enough to eat?!

OMG, she's GOOD!!!! You need some totally pass-agg message to reply. How about "Sorry we hadn't catered enough... we hadn't planned on it being anyone outside our actual family. Next time? Perhaps when we come round to yours for those drinks you offered earlier?"

And a big gold Star for you for updating in real-time!!! (couldn't be better, unless you'd also added a diagram!)

Hahaha88 · 21/04/2019 19:48

I can just imagine ndn posting her own AIBU "CF ndn invited us for a BBQ and we had to share 2 sausages and 3 burger's (one looked suspiciously nibbled on) between 6 of us! Aibu in thinking she's a terrible host. Grin some people are so oblivious to their Cfery lol

Hahaha88 · 21/04/2019 19:50

I should clarify I mean your ndn are CF not you op

Original poster
Donotunderstandmyhouse · 21/04/2019 19:51

@RedHatsDoNotSuitMe thank you takes a bow I would like to say it's because I get frustrated with threads that begin and go nowhere but really I have greatly enjoyed some of the comments on here and feel a bit more normal having spent the last week indoors mainly talking to my dog.

I'd be happy to add a diagram of the roof plus skylight? My dh went up a minute ago to prove to my dad that you couldn't possibly fall out (yes this is still being discussed) and I wanted to take a picture but feel it's probably too outing 😂 think one small head sticking out of a roof jumping up and down 😂😂 god knows what the rest of the neighbours think of us!

OP posts:
Still18atheart · 21/04/2019 19:51

Just say because of the last minute request we weren’t able to nip tot he shops as we were getting ready for the guests who we actually invited and quite a while ago I might add. Also if you live where I live no supermarkets are open today and the spar type shops would have sold out of bbq stuff at like 10:30am I reckon

Original poster
Donotunderstandmyhouse · 21/04/2019 19:54

@Hahaha88 yes ! I will be eyes peeled in case it pops up! Tbf if she is on here then she will definitely know this is about her...I had changed a few bits at the beginning but now I'm so engaged in the thread my anonymity is gone! 😂 also whispers before they came my sister fed the dog a sausage so not only did we not have enough food we had also fed our dog before them 🙈

OP posts:
Still18atheart · 21/04/2019 19:57

Grin at feeding the ddog before them

HerRoyalFattyness · 21/04/2019 19:57

Grin this thread has been fantastic.

timeisnotaline · 21/04/2019 19:59

So cheeky. Well rebuffed op , to start with anyway! At least you have the measure of them - would have been worse if they had started out only a little unreasonable and suddenly you realised you were not having bbqs or using the garden as they had ‘booked’ it Grin. With you catering of course. And cleaning the bbq.

CantStopMeNow · 21/04/2019 20:00

Now you've had a small dose of her cheekyfuckery - i hope you're not going to be letting her use your garden/bbq/sandpit etc at any point in the future?
Actually, i'd put a boundary of some sorts between your gardens so she doesn't think this encounter means she can use your garden anytime she likes - even without permission.