To wonder what exactly middle class and upper class Mums do to be skinny

[Humpy84]

I am a Mum of a two year old turning three July. Not an age that he can be packed up for long walks in buggy.

I have gained weight and feeling overwhelmed by everything.

I have noticed and I think it is obvious that middle and upper class Mums tend to be slimmer.

I want to know if you identify this and if so what is your weekly shopping routine, meal plan, how do you exercise with or without toddler/s, tips and tricks etc, diet plans, etc etc.

I know lots of slim people (I mean slim as in normal bmi, ie not overweight. I don,'t mean super-skinny) who eat all the carbs they want.

In our family we all eat bread or cereal for breakfast, then a nice sandwich for lunch (eg spicy chicken may salad) or baked potato, then.snack on.crisps and fruit, then eat sausages, mash and broccoli with choc cake for pud. The kids then have more snacks in the evening (pot noodle, crisps or sandwich) yet we are all around bmi of 22

I reckon it's all about exercise

Walking dog, walking to school and doing sport daily (martial arts, running, tennis) means we can eat lasagna, pizza or whatever we fancy

I really think exercise is everything, diet isn't.

People in my office are always talking diets, eating only salad for lunch, then fantasize about cake and choc... I think.diet culture makes people fat, they start obsessing over food.

And this constant snacking can't be good.

It’s 80% diet / 20% exercise

You definitely have a DH problem. He sounds like a selfish dick.

Why is his free time more important? You both should have equal amounts of child free leisure time.

He's the main reason why you're struggling - with both PND and your weight.

Amazing thread that's really made me think.
I'm working class, so is my partner. My parents have their own very successful business (Big House and Fab Hols) but insist they are working class. Yet my sibling who works for parents declares herself middleclass!

My place of work employs over 200 people. The owner who is very down to earth and very approachable is adamant he is working class (loves his allotment).

Surely the trick is to be disciplined. just eat in moderation and give yourself smaller portions on smaller plates. You wont starve, and yes you'll feel shit and hungry. But reward yourself after a week. chances are as the weight drops off it will motivate you.

It's because food is just too accessible these days, its everywhere plus you can have the damn stuff delivered to your door!! little wonder obesity is rising.

Just say NO.

The slim people I know eat low calorie or 'light' food like soups and salads for lunch. They may not be doing it on purpose to reduce or maintain their weight, but that's what they're doing nevertheless.

I just dont see this. Its overweight people who often dont eat much lunch and then comment about how much I eat. Presumably then by 1.30pm they are starving so it makes them snack.

Generally I eat a fairly small breakfast and then 2 proper meals, I rarely snack and dont eat after dinner in the evening but at lunchtime particularly at work if I've got up early I'm ravenous. You have to eat mainly healthy food but listen to your body.

And this 80% diet 20% exercise thing is nonsense. Some people respond better than others to exercise and it depends how much exercise you do. If you burn 1000cal a day doing exercise then it has a massive impact but that is a lot of exercise!

I agree it's a class thing, here anyway. The prep school mums are 80% skinny. State primary usually 80% at least a little over weight.

The skinny well off mums I know have childcare either nannies or boarding and they do lots of gym classes, skiing, getting fit for skiing, busy busy busy!! You just cannot imagine them eating toast in front of the telly (me) or picking at their kids tea (also me). They also tend to have husbands that work in London and are away during the week so they don't have to cook for anyone.

I think that there is a lot of "pressure" to look a certain way. I am very working class but happen to love in a very affluent area. When DD was a preschooler she attended ballet ( Friday pm at 1pm). I would come straight from work in my nursing uniform and generally look like shit.

All other mums there had very expensive active wear on ( think sweatybetty etc) and spoke about the week they had had. A LOT of chatter about PT sessions, long walks in the local park followed by a few hours drinking skinny latte in the bistro. There seemed to be some competition amongst them about who had been the "busiest" the most in the week.
High flying husbands and a pressure to present a certain way seemed obvious

Live not love

I love saying 'No not really' if the busy busy busy mums ask me if I've been busy. They panic.

Frazzledcareerwoman I dunno! I don’t even think about what I’m eating, it’s just functional. I told the diet woman I was referred to, that I would find something like slimfast really easy as it doesn’t require head space planning or thinking - 2 shakes a day plus a small meal. I could do that (if they funded it!). But starting batch cooking calorie free vegetable soup at 9pm after a 15 hour day, well realistically despite good intentions it isn’t going to happen.

Dunno about exercise either - would have to get up at 5.30am and power walk I guess (always feel 9pm in winter is a bit dodgy to be out running alone). Perhaps I’m just too lazy to do that.

Fazackerley - it is not nonsense at all, even Ronaldo has his diet monitored he can’t just eat what he likes and I’ve no doubt he’s burning off more than 1000 calories a day one way or another. If you eat shite that is what you’ll look like

Wasn't me Guv!

I wouldn't right off the correlation between class and weight. Cheap food quick easy gratification, if your financially constricted this can be a lure. Eating well when you have plenty of money isn't going to be a chore. Not saying it's impossible but I'm sure there are barriers in the way.

Yes fruit is expensive. I am not badly off but I remember being 😲 when I saw a friends Waitrose delivery absolutely full of avocados berries chia seeds pre prepared packs of fruit

even Ronaldo has his diet monitored he can’t just eat what he likes and I’ve no doubt he’s burning off more than 1000 calories a day

That’s presumably to ensure he is diet optimises his performance not because he’s going to get a belly if he has the odd slice of cake.

If someone’s burning off more calories than they’re eating, they’ll lose weight... it’s simple physics.

Yes it is physics but you need to do a fuck of a lot of exercise to burn 1000 cals. Much more doable to eat less.

Fazackerley - apologies.

It's 80% diet. Unless you are under 25.

1000 cal a day on exercise is way more than anyone has time to do unless they are a pro sportsperson. You'd need to cycle hard for about 3 hours or do 3 bikram yoga classes...

& unfortunately 300 cal in a chocolate bar means you can't afford to eat stuff like that as you will be hungry again in an hour and you won't lose weight.

People tend to overestimate exercise calories and underestimate food calories

Why don’t I lose weight? Time, specifically lack of it. I can’t even think about a plan to lose weight as I have no mind space left over. Let alone act on it. My gp brought up the topic and referred me to a specialist weight loss initiative in our area (6 month waiting list). After a half hour intiial meeting they said I wasn’t in the right place in life or the right head space to join the programme. They had a point.

I think you've somehow got yourself into a very pessimistic frame of mind regarding dieting and weight loss.

If your meals are generally healthy the one very easy step you can take is to half your portion and eat it slowly (so you don't finish before everyone else when you eat together). Fill the rest of your plate with salad or green veg. Then have a big mug of tea or coffee. I have done this and I truly just feel like I have eaten my dinner. Don't snack, let unsweetened drinks take the place of snacks. (You might need to get decaf tea / coffee if you are sensitive to caffeine). Fill any spare time with totally absorbing activities (great books/tv, sewing / anything).

Regarding cooking with the halving portions you will find you can freeze the extra to eat at a later date. So you don't need to cook as often. Bulk your meals out with veg and every time you cook aim to freeze and extra dinner for everyone as well as an extra individual lunch portion for yourself. Less cooking and home made ready meals. I would freeze meat carved off a roast joint in some gravy for example, some roast potatoes and Yorkshire pudding from a roast for example to heat up. The Yorkshire's, meat and gravy microwaves and roasties go in the oven like oven chips do. Regarding my portion I would only have one small roast potato, half a small Yorkshire, half the size of my palm of meat, gravy with green veg (usually green beans and peas). That fills a plate up and I am full afterwards. You can only try it and see.

I have lost over 2 stones in weight after being overweight after cancer treatment (can't diet or exercise much during). I run as well but mainly doing laps of slow running round my hallway and lounge wearing a weighted pack for 45 mins most days to music. I like it, it chills me out.

I’m just naturally slim. I snack on sweets and rubbish - high metabolism I suppose.

Some people do do a lot of exercise. You obviously don't but 3hrs cycling is something I do really frequently. I agree that many people overestimate but it depends how much you are doing. What has being 25 got to do with it? I'm in my 40s and my metabolism is the same as it always has been

The amount and type of food I can eat and stay slim has definitely reduced post 40

When I was time-pressed working ft the best solution was gym at lunch or running across London to her home rather than the overground

It's all about diet. I went crazy for a while with exercise...did two gym classes a day... spinning, pump, hiit. Didn't change my diet. Got fitter but didn't lose any weight

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