To think this colleague is a knob and to tell her to wind her neck in

[lastqueenofscotland]

I work in a small team so maybe she’s getting on my tits cause there’s nowhere to deflect it to but....

I’m a vegan, I’m not a preachy one, my DP eats meat my lodger eats meat my sister eats meat. I don’t care, I’ll get proper milk in when I’ve got people round, I just choose not to eat it. and it went unnoticed at work until someone arranged a work meal and I had to mention it.
My.fucking.god. You’d think I’d mentioned I only eat live puppies to one woman. She doesn’t like me much anyway but this has weirdly been something for her to sink her claws in about. Everything I do is fussy/something she whinges about, asking for a black coffee on the brew round gets an eye roll, having an apple as a snack “oh that would never fill me,” offered her a slice of toast from the bread I brought in “oh no I bet vegan bread is disgusting” couldn’t be bothered with the argument that most bread is vegan so left it.
Today she had a massive go at me after I perfectly politely turned down a chocolate biscuit she offered me, going on about how I’m being pathetic, I should just eat it it’s not like cows die to make milk. Decided to not mention the problems of the dairy industry and just politely say “no thank you” again.

She also has recently taking to deciding everything I eat is SO unhealthy and having a go about me about everything because I need chicken...
WIBU to tell her I’m not taking diet advice from someone who eats pot noodle and share size bags of crisps for lunch and to wind her fucking neck in?

She needs to get a life.

The grown-up me is saying report her. It's basically bullying.

The rest of me is saying pick up EVERYTHING she says. The black coffee eye roll – 'Problem?'

'Oh that would never fill me' 'Yes, you've said that before.'

'oh no I bet vegan bread is disgusting' 'That's a strange thing to say. Most bread is vegan, obviously.'

Turning down a chocolate biscuit, you're 'pathetic', it’s not like cows die to make milk etc 'I beg your pardon?'

There is only one acceptable response to the woman:

SHUT THE FUCK UP

It's a big part of why I left my last job too - the difficulty there was it was the boss who was the bully!

Me too - although it was bitchy office colleagues with me. The bosses were fantastic, though ineffectual. I now work from home after being in admin for nearly 25 years. It was a small cliquey place I lived in too.

Part and parcel of being vegan sadly. I'm vegan, and like you I'm not a 'preachy vegan', I just get on with it and respect other folks' choices, but would love it if they respected mine.

Unfortunately, hearing the v-word is like a red rag to some people, they see it as an invite to start a row. It's so draining.

I've plenty of time to discuss the reasons as to why I went vegan 16 months ago, after 27 years as a vegetarian. (Best decision I ever made incidentally, wish I'd done it sooner, but I was totally oblivious to how cruel the dairy industry was.) But I like a healthy, calm discussion, comments like "Bacon though?" are ridiculous.

Calmly call her out in front of others. Something like, "I'm sorry my lifestyle choices offend you, what can we do to get over this?" Embarrass her. She's BVU.

Also take in loads of yummy vegan snacks and treats to work for everyone. I find it breaks down the mystery of veganism. People are often surprised by how lovely our food is.

Good luck. ,