Bathing your kid twice a day .... is it me? Am I an evil step mother.

[lickencivers]

I’ve gained two lovely step children. One of which suffers from pretty horrific eczema. Especially on hands (all cracked open at the knuckles etc). Whilst I have dry skin myself I have zero experience of this sort of stuff with my own DC.

DP and their mum seem to be using a lot of steroid based cream and epiderm but it doesn’t do a thing to ease him.

I’ve suggested alternative things (like putting porridge oats in a sock in the bath) as helped the itching when Mine had chicken pox etc

However, they bath their kids normally twice a day. If not twice then definitely religiously every night. Without fail. Gina Ford babies —I didn’t do routine either— any way. Any help or advice? Because I’m getting ulcers biting my tongue.

DS has bad eczema and we were prescribed both a cream and a bath oil.
The bath oil is oilatum and I can't live without it now. We changed his baths from once a day to once every 2 days and saw a massive improvement too. Used diprobase initially but that did bugger all. Now we use vaseline intensive moisturiser and it's been amazing for him. We've been changing up the routine every time it reaches an impasse and flares up again. Depends on the weather as well.

2 baths a day with no emollient is crazy. Surely that's got to be hindering rather than helping.

I agree with the posters about - your DH might be well intentioned, but what is going on is neglect/abuse. The kids need to see a doctor ASAP who can review their condition and make recommendations. I would honestly alert social services if your DH won't listen to you.

My DD had terrible eczema when she was younger and has fortunately mostly grown out of it. In my experience frequent baths DEFINITELY made it worse, specialist at the hospital confirmed it too.

Epaderm works wonders for my sons skin. He has it applied every evening very thickly before his pjs and he hasn't experienced a flare for a long time. We bathe him as little as possible.

You’re in an impossible situation here op and I just wanted to send you some 💐. I couldn’t do the whole step parent thing. Look after little children / care for them / bond with them. Love them, know them into adulthood and at the same time mind your own business and butt out. You’re a better woman than me. Good luck with it all x

My almost 10 year old had terrible eczema as a baby and has also luckily grown out of it, but we were advised to keep bathing to a minimum too. Twice a day seems to totally contradict everything I was told to relieve her discomfort

My DD had horrendous eczema when very young. Doctor prescribed Oilatum Emolliant to use in her bath & it was incredible. Her skin was vastly improved almost immediately & worked well until she was older & the condition resolved itself.

Is it possible the eczema is caused by something - my brother and my son both have an intolerance to dairy. Dairy causes them to start getting dry itchy skin within about 2 hours.
My brother who was diagnosed late was head to foot eczema and had been for months on end before they found a a problem with cows milk - 2 weeks on goats milk instead of cows milk and he was completely clear. This was in the 70s - it was a vet that actually found the cause not the doctors (despite lots of tests).

My sons dairy allergy came back negative, but the dietician agreed that he’d got a problem and we keep him on dairy free (he’s not tried goat milk products - we switched to them when I was a child thanks to my brother, and I loathe even the smell to this day).
See if you can get the child referred to a dietician to see if that helps the problem (sorry,can’t help with creams - nothing seemed to work!)

Should have said - the change of diet has completely cleared up my sons eczema

This thread is mad. Why are people so incapable of accepting that individuals can react differently and need different treatment? I have eczema and loads of the recommended creams make me worse but I don't go around telling other people they must be wrong for saying it worked for them. People take it so PERSONALLY that most people agree bathing twice a day is bad for eczema when THEY'VE been told to do that 😮

Whatever these children have had as their routine for the last year, it hasn't worked so I think it's fair enough to try something different.

And bathing twice a day is bonkers whether you've got eczema or not but this is Mumsnet where it's considered normal

bathing twice a day is a big NO! my son has been having eczema till recently and we have been using steroid creams and all sort of chemical creams. it never had any effect. Then I decided to stop using all the chemicals once and for all and instead tried to focus in healing his eczema from within. It is not a quick process ,we started in Octbober 2018, but now there is a huge improvement and that is all without any single application of steroid cream (they are horrible and should never be used). I even put together some tips as I wanted to our experience battling with my sons eczema ,hoping that it will help all the other people who are also suffering from this condition. Its all about eliminating irritants and having a correct skincare and bathing routine with all the natural products along the way !!!
please do watch my video and hope it will help you :

OP - how are the children getting on now?

I've read your posts and am horrified that the parents of these poor children are allowing this to continue. At least they have an responsible adult (you) looking out for them.