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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU not to give my children a double bed each?

529 replies

TheCherries · 16/04/2019 23:22

I am in the process of decorating new bedrooms for my two young teenagers.

Both are insistent their friends all now have double beds and it isn’t fair I am making them keep their single beds.

Changing their beds isn’t an option we don’t have the budget for it anyway but it got me thinking is it really a rite of passage to have a double bed as a teenager?

Surely you wait until you are an age to share the bed with another. My feeling is the larger the bed the more you get used to spreading out.

I would prefer to keep the single bed with guest bed underneath for sleepovers and enjoy the extra space in their rooms the rest of the time.

We have two spare bedrooms so we don’t need to double up the use of their beds for relatives staying over.

Do yours have a double bed?

OP posts:
PurplePenguins · 18/04/2019 18:22

None of my DC have ever asked for a double bed. The middle two still share a bunk bed at 18 and 16. My eldest has a single too. I didn't have a double bed until I moved out at 21.

Gwenhwyfar · 18/04/2019 18:23

"Anyways they are not babies - get them proper sized beds."

A single bed is a proper sized bed for one person.

JellyNo15 · 18/04/2019 18:24

My DS was six foot at fourteen so we got him a king and DS1 a double at the same time.

Gohardorgohome · 18/04/2019 18:30

I had a double from age 17. My daughter has one now at four but only because it is handy for guests when she has her brothers spare bunk. But I think the point is that if you can’t afford it then it’s a no and they should understand that

Tini17 · 18/04/2019 18:32

I think it’s fairly common to have doubles for teenagers?
Isn’t there something about there being comparably less room to move about in a single bed for an adult (and a lot of teenager are as tall as!) than in a cot for a baby? 🤔

But if you don’t have the budget, that’s it. They can save up for one?

Witchend · 18/04/2019 18:34

I have teens (18/15 and a near teen). Neither they nor any of their friends except one have a double bed.
Two of my dc's rooms couldn't fit a double bed in, so it would feel unfair to give one to the one who already has a bigger room. But none of them have ever asked anyway.

wittyusermane · 18/04/2019 18:34

I don't know any teens who have double beds. Most of the teens I know have 2-4 siblings closer in age to my (younger) DCs so perhaps that has a bearing on it; suspect it's easier to find space for doubles for 1-2 children as opposed to 3-5.

I would consider a teen/child with a double very lucky rather than a teen with a single being somehow deprived! Confused

Single beds are not 'children's beds', they are simply beds designed for a single person?

That said, having read this thread now I'm now considering whether treating eldest to a double might make sense for guest-staying purposes... Grin

Puzzledandpissedoff · 18/04/2019 18:34

@Brizzlemint I think the PP who replied to you about a kingsize was in Australia? In the UK it goes like this:

Small single 2ft 6in
Single 3ft
Small double 4ft (also known as Queen size)
Double 4ft 6in
King size 5ft
Super king 6ft

Up to "double" they're 6ft 3in long, and at king size it changes to 6ft 6in

cantkeepawayforever · 18/04/2019 18:37

I can see that it also depends on what you use your room for.

DS's bedroom doubles as a music practise room - so he has an electric piano, 2 musical instruments on stands, a music stand, etc - as well as a room to study and sleep in. As well as the musical equipment, he has a wardrobe, very large bookcase for music, leisure and study books, and a decent-sized desk.

DD's bedroom doubles mainly as a study, as she has managed to gradually co-opt the sitting room as her art studio / textiles workroom! However when we want the sitting room back, then she uses her room for art and textiles coursework and leisure.

If everything else was in other rooms of the house, then i could see that taking up lots of space with a double bed might make sense. While they are multi-purpose rooms for busy teens with academic work to do, singles are fine. DS is 6'2", and fits an adult single absolutely fine..

brizzlemint · 18/04/2019 18:42

Single beds are children's beds as far as I am concerned - I'm single but I wouldn't have a single bed if you paid me.

icelollycraving · 18/04/2019 18:42

Ds has a double bed. He’s 7. He also has the largest bedroom.
He plays in his room and do needs a bit more room. I did go sleep and we had the double already so it seemed sensible to use it. He loves his bed!

KindredSpirit1 · 18/04/2019 18:44

Quite happy to let my children have a double bed. My first thought is definitely not sex, just comfort. You can as others have mentioned you can get them off eBay (we got a huge oak bed for about £15 in gorgeous condition)
You will hopefully end up with two very happy teens who have slept well.

Gwenhwyfar · 18/04/2019 18:45

"Single beds are children's beds as far as I am concerned - I'm single but I wouldn't have a single bed if you paid me."

So if you went to hospital, you'd have to sleep in a child's bed?
When you go to a hotel that has both single rooms and doubles, do you pay extra for the double?
You're being quite ridiculous.

neveradullmoment99 · 18/04/2019 18:45

A double bed? Really? What next Hmm

nuxe1984 · 18/04/2019 18:46

If you can't afford to change it then that's your response to them.
Got 2 daughters, now adults. One asked for a double bed when we reside her room around aged 15 years. The other wasn't bothered and wanted the space for her drum kit.
They'd always had a large single 3 ft wide. They're both tall so a small single bed would be a bit cramped for them.

Gwenhwyfar · 18/04/2019 18:47

"Isn’t there something about there being comparably less room to move about in a single bed for an adult (and a lot of teenager are as tall as!) than in a cot for a baby? 🤔"

A single bed is bigger than half a double so that would mean people sharing a double have even less space.
I have a double, but only sleep on one side anyway. What's the point of a double for one person?

lauramaywharton · 18/04/2019 18:49

Mines had one since he was 4 but its only because we had a double bed already and I thought what's the point buying a single. But I wouldn't go out of my way to buy my child a double it should be brought them self's or as a present not just because they want one. Kids reck things so no point spending extra on furniture.

Littlenic73 · 18/04/2019 18:51

I don't think yabu at all. My dd will be 12 tomorrow, she has a triple bunk (double on the bottom) but only so there is room for visitors to stay, we don't have a guest room and if my in-laws came with kids they could all sleep in her room,or we could and she could share with her brother who has a loft with a sofa bed below.

Mood84 · 18/04/2019 18:53

What's wrong with wanting to sprawl out if you're in a bed by yourself?

Gwenhwyfar · 18/04/2019 18:56

"What's wrong with wanting to sprawl out if you're in a bed by yourself?"

Nothing wrong with it, but it's not necessary and if you're not used to it, it's not something you miss.

jessebuni · 18/04/2019 18:58

My parents basically said if I wanted a double bed I needed to buy it myself. If it was important to me I would save and buy one. I did. I was 16 at the time though. My brothers didn’t have double beds while living at home both waited until they moved out. Some of my friends had doubles but others had singles. Didn’t really seem like a rite of passage or anything I think it was just different for everyone.

ZforZack · 18/04/2019 18:59

I had a double bed when I could afford to buy my own with a weekend job , while my parents were paying I had a single & lumped it

brizzlemint · 18/04/2019 19:02

So if you went to hospital, you'd have to sleep in a child's bed?
When you go to a hotel that has both single rooms and doubles, do you pay extra for the double?
You're being quite ridiculous.

FFS at hospital you aren't going to get a double bed for space reasons - though I did when I had a private room (as in a single room not a paid for room)

Yes I always have a double bed in a hotel - if you book a room for one you get a double room in every hotel I've stayed in over the last twenty years for pleasure and business.

What gives you the right to tell me that my choice of a double bed is ridiculous? I have a big bedroom, I can afford a king size bed so I will.

Mymadworld · 18/04/2019 19:02

My eldest (13) has a proper double and the youngest has a single with trundle bed to make it a double or 2 singles. We don't have a spare bedroom and have family to stay fairly regularly so ds1 moves into ds2's room and his double bed is the guest bed.

Fowles94 · 18/04/2019 19:09

I had one at 13 only because my uncle pulled his from the attic (bearing in mind this was his 30 year old uni bed) then a mattress instead of birthday presents off my parents.

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