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AIBU?

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Original poster

‘So happy little Johnny got his 1st choice school’

164 replies

Mangetoutrodney · 16/04/2019 20:27

All over social media today with photos ‘So happy that little Johnny got his first choice primary school’

Aibu to think it’s not a bloody competition & it just rubs it in the faces of all the parents that didn’t get any of their choices etc. When did it become a ‘thing’?

Both my kids got their choices of school when they went to primary and start secondary in sept but I never would have dreamt about putting it on social media particularly because I know devastated people that had to go through the stress of appeals. Absolutely bonkers.

OP posts:
Original poster
Mangetoutrodney · 16/04/2019 20:50

It’s not so much the boasting. It’s the general insensitivity!!

OP posts:
YeOldeTrout · 16/04/2019 20:51

Tsk. Churlish you lot.
I'm happy when good things happen in the lives of people I care about. They aren't to blame for others getting disappointments.

Haffiana · 16/04/2019 20:54

So you expect them to consider that others didn't get their first choice?

Why can't you equally consider that they might be happy that they DID get their first choice and be happy for them?

frantastic1 · 16/04/2019 20:54

It's a little mean spirited to be grumpy about this. Ok it's not the centre of your world right now but for the past 6 months it's been quite a large talking point at play dates, nurseries etc so I can consume you. You've probably chosen that order carefully/strategically and actually in my experience a lot of people do ask whether you got the school they wanted. It's conversation! Most people are nice and genuinely interested, like I am with friends, this year, previous years before I had kids.. it's a milestone. . If you're not interested just scroll past. It's not a 'brag', it's just sharing something you're happy about. I'd rather know that than what you had for tea!

Dothehappydance · 16/04/2019 20:56

It comes from a place of relief for most I think, especially when it is a subsequent child.

I however didn't post that DS had got into the secondary of choice, thanks to a monumental mess up, many children didn't have a school place and those that did a significant number didn't get their first choice.

I imagine people roll their eyes at what you post as well.

Tinyteatime · 16/04/2019 20:56

It’s so cringeworthy.

happyhillock · 16/04/2019 20:56

In Scotland you don't get a choice of primary school the children go where the education dept say there going, have said that mine did well at school, have good job's, didn't go to university either.

limitedperiodonly · 16/04/2019 20:59

Some people are really bitter

IndianaMoleWoman · 16/04/2019 20:59

I posted, not because I was proud (nothing to be proud of - no skill involved) but because I was happy and relieved. We have been through so much to get into the catchment of a decent school for our DD (we live inner city and some of the schools near our old address are diabolical) and I felt so happy that the massive gamble of moving house had paid off (and we didn’t move because we are rich - we’ve bought a smaller house in a “better” area, had a broken chain and ended up in rental for a while).

I find the argument that you can’t post anything happy because someone might not be experiencing the same happiness bizarre. People would never post anything by this logic: “Eating my tea” - what about people who can’t afford food? “Watching telly” - stop showing off because you can afford electricity! “Breathing” - I have asthma, stop rubbing my nose in it.

keepforgettingmyusername · 16/04/2019 21:00

are you sure that they're boasting? They just sound happy. People are allowed to share their happiness Confused

Dothehappydance · 16/04/2019 21:00

What exactly is acceptable to post on FB? Seems everything is criticised.

Witchtower · 16/04/2019 21:02

OP. can I ask why it bothered you?
I’m not really sure why it would bother anyone?

With DC1 I was so anxious for months and was also excited as it is such a huge milestone for me & my child. It has honestly never crossed my mind that it would be offensive to anyone.

Original poster
Mangetoutrodney · 16/04/2019 21:02

It just feels like social media has made everyone go slightly mad & narcissistic. That people share every single thing that ever happens to them.

Maybe I need to come off social media Grin

OP posts:
Bugsymalonemumof2 · 16/04/2019 21:03

To be fair the ones whinging about an awful allocated school because they only put one/completely unrealistic choices down are more annoying. In some areas it really is pot luck but in areas such as mine it is a lot more predictable so many of them only have themselves to blame sadly :(

JaniceBattersby · 16/04/2019 21:04

Nobody bloody posts any nice news on FB for fear of sneery people looking down their noses and scrutinising every little thing.

That’s why it’s now been reduced to people being ‘discusted’ at their wheelie bin not being collected or trying to sell their ‘Chester drawers’

Things that I’ve seen on here that people are OUTRAGED if anyone else posts on FB:

  • Scan pictures
  • Things they do with their kids over the holidays that are deemed too middle class
  • Anything that might identify whereabouts they might live including school uniform or pictures with any identifying architectural features.
  • Anything that involves ‘checking in’ anywhere.
  • Any pictures that might accidentally feature other kids in the background (safeguarding!)
  • Any picture of kids in any type of swimwear, however modest.
  • Any type of achievement they make because it’s ‘boastful’.

Bollocks to that. I love seeing pics of my friends kids having fun, hearing what they’ve been up to and I am happy for people when good things happen in their lives. I wish more people would post happy stuff.

Noobcrumble · 16/04/2019 21:04

I think the idea of “rubbing it in other peoples faces” can be applied to anything and everything when it comes to social media - which is why I find facebook toxic! Can’t stand the “feeling so blessed - hubby just bought me a new LandRover” crap when someone could have just been through a painful divorce/financial worries etc.
I can’t be alone in thinking that when something good happens, I keep it to myself/close family and friends and would feel incredibly uncomfortable posting something so upbeat in the knowledge that it could hurt someone. So - the first thought that springs to mind when I hear that someone has bragged about their child getting into the first choice school when it is common knowledge that many are not at the moment is utter arsehole. I’m sure they will be flooded with the same old generic responses of “oh I’m so happy for you, me too” - followed by aren’t we blessed (my favourite saying Hmm )

ShawshanksRedemption · 16/04/2019 21:05

Thing is though OP, any posts on FB could be seen as insensitive. For example, having a birthday meal out/party for your DC could be seen as insensitive for those that either don't have money, or can't have kids.

Like any other post you're not interested in, just scroll on past.

FinallyMrsE · 16/04/2019 21:05

I posted but more in a ‘my little girl is growing up and starting school in September’ rather than a bragging post, people did ask if I got my first choice because some of my friends are interested in my children and me in theirs and the people that weren’t interested just scrolled past and ignored it.

I don’t understand how so many people are on social media yet seem to be irritated by everything anyone posts.

Bunnybigears · 16/04/2019 21:05

I dont mind them sharing they are glad their kid got in to the school they chose because for some it will be a huge relief after months of stressing. But it's the ones that say "Well done little Johnny for getting into x school" when little Johnny did absolutely f all to be congratulated on.

lyralalala · 16/04/2019 21:06

I found it quite bizarre today as so many people posted 'yay we got the school we wanted' when we live in the arse end of nowhere and the choice is undersubscribed school in this village or undersubscribed school two villages away.

Generally everyone picks the closer school and everyone gets in. I can't remember there ever being a time where people didn't. I phoned a few weeks ago because I wanted to switch my preference (after an isse for my DS with the new Deputy Head) for my DD starting and it was a non issue as both schools have spaces.

Totally random to be celebrating something that everyone who applied got!

FinallyMrsE · 16/04/2019 21:07

Sorry i seem to have x posted with lots of people 🤦🏻‍♀️

SoupDragon · 16/04/2019 21:10

Since when has being happy about something been the same as boasting?

Geraniumpink · 16/04/2019 21:10

This reminds me of a time when I wasn’t allowed to talk about my wedding in the office in which I worked because my colleague wanted her boyfriend to propose to her and he hadn’t yet.

It’s OK to be happy for your children on social media.
Although I personally prefer cat photos.

HexagonalBattenburg · 16/04/2019 21:11

Mine today has been lots of school allocations - not pride posts but a lot of bloody relief from those of us out of catchment applying for juniors and hoping our kids got to stay with their friendship group. Alternative was a return to the crap local school we removed her from after suffering bullying.

CalleighDoodle · 16/04/2019 21:11

delighted to announce we are having a baby.
so pleased we booked our summer holidays today. It's going to be hot, hot, hot!
so happy my wonderful bf proposed last night!
#soblessed
SIGNED! we have bought our first house. here's to getting on the housing ladder #mortgagelife
went out for steak and chips last night. so good #carnivore
had a lovely meal with both my parents today #family
jonnie got in to our first choice school #loveourtown
i voted tory! #may

literally anything on social media could upset someone else. stop taking it personally. something someone is proud of isnt a direct attack on others.

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