Please settle an argument .......... in other peoples' houses ............shoes on or shoes off?

[helpamamaout]

On entering someone else's home, should the visitor keep their shoes on or remove them?

But at work and I clean people's houses I can honestly say I wouldn't take my shoes off. As I'm mopping floors, messing with chemicals, up and down stairs ..

Interesting that these places are going from shoes-off to shoes-on, where I think the UK is slowly going the other way

I think it is to do with weather and floor coverings. Fitted carpet has only been around for most people post WWII.

If you have stone or floor boards the floors are cold and in the case of the latter often drafty. So it's logical to wear something on your feet. The floor can also be scrubbed clean.

Once you get fitted carpets you have flooring that is not easily moved, cannot be scrubbed and is expensive to replace.

It's then more sensible to take shoes off.

At the same time central heating has become the norm so carpets can be sat on comfortably.

Off please. My flooring is clean so I don't want anyone trailing in dirt.

Always off. Vvv rude not too.

No it isn’t vvv rude not to take your shoes off!! Plenty of houses do not take their shoes off and would have no problem with you not taking your shoes off.

but if mumsnet and Wikipedia is anything to go by it

I think we all know MN is definitely not the norm!

@BasilTheGreat - Off. Anything else is rude and unhygienic.

On. Anything else is rude and over-familiar.

Or, you know, maybe different people do things differently and we should just accept that and follow the lead of the host. If they aren't wearing shoes, ask should you remove yours (as they may still not want bare or socked feet). If they're wearing shoes, leave yours on.

I always offer to take my shoes off and take them off automatically if for some reason the host isn’t at the immediate door when I enter.

It’s default though. When I was a young teen my parents had brand new carpets put in nearly every room and we had to take our shoes off at home so we didn’t ruin the carpet.

Shoes off and I take slippers when I go on regular visits to a friend’s house and she returns the favour.

I knew of a woman who wouldn't take the plastic covers off her new sofa. I know she was proud of it and replacing things costs money, but still it seemed like she was more into possessions than her visitors who had to sit on noisy, sweaty plastic.

It really depends on what the floor covering is! If it's nice, thick, spotless carpet than of course I would take off my shoes (this is my Mum's floor, for example). But we have wood and tile floors which a) can be chilly through socks and b) are easy to keep clean so I don't expect anyone to take of their shoes at ours.
If I am going to someone's house where I know they have wood / tile floors and I want to feel comfortable then I take my own slippers (I have a "free from a hotel" pair i keep in the car for this purpose).

Shoes on for visitors to my home, unless they're too rude to wipe their feet on the handily-provided, large door mat, in which case I probably wouldn't be inviting them in anyway. I take my own shoes off and put on slippers when I get in though. I find people agonising about their poorly-chosen cream carpets downstairs unbearably twee. Any workmen that come to the house are told they don't need to remove their boots also- I have sturdy cloths to cover stair carpets etc if necessary.

I always ask before I visit a new friend's home for the first time, because my feet get super cold, and I take slippers if they're a shoes off home. However I have only one friend who has this requirement, and even she tells me not to take my shoes off when I go there (because she knows I haven't traipsed through dog poo on my way there). I still do though, because that's her preference.

My parents would have been horrified if someone took their shoes off in public (or in someone's house), so I think customs change. Best ask, and be prepared to take shoes off if required.So don't wear holey socks when visiting :0

This is an argument which you will never settle, because there are (at least) two equally valid, equally strongly held and diametrically opposing views.

If it's your house and you would prefer people to take their shoes off, you need to say so and make provision. But also remember that they are your guests and asking them to do so may cause embarrassment. I would rather hoover up after a guest than make them feel uncomfortable in my home.

Why would you want shoes on indoors though? Genuine question.

I very strongly dislike when people where shoes inside our house, but I don't ask them to take them off since that is viewed as rude here. If they ask, I'd say it's up to them but it's pretty obvious that we don't wear shoes at home.

One of the reasons we've had all our carpets out is because I feel I can clean hard flooring more easily. It's my way of adapting to the culture in the UK.

UK poster, and the norm for almost everyone I know is shoes on. I don't think anyone can say it's a UK norm to remove shoes.

I was never bothered previously what guest did but that was when I had laminate flooring throughout downstairs.

Now in a very expensive private let, with brand new light grey carpet throughout the downstairs, I'd appreciate shoes off

Definitely keep on. I was always taught it’s a bit lower class to ask people to take them off. And before I get flamed, that isn’t my opinion, it’s my mothers. I don’t like taking shoes off, especially if it’s a nice event. Sure dress up
In your Sunday beat with lovely shoes then have to take them off? No.

My gut instinct is to take mine off because that's what we do at home but I have one friend whose kids are frequently sick all over the carpets and they keep their shoes on so in that house I do keep them on, for self preservation!! If they took theirs off I'd do it too and change my socks as soon as I got home (I'm not sure how well she cleans the carpets after all the sick!)

In my experience householder specifies if they want shoes off

PS I often take my shoes off at home but it's not a rule and not the first thing I do unless my shoes are very uncomfortable or dirty. It's not like ''shoes have to be on'' rather ''you can take them off if you want.''

At the moment we've got a puppy who we're house-training, so if you're barefoot be extra careful!

It’s not the norm in the U.K. to take your shoes off indoors

That's news to me!

I always take them off!

I think it depends on what sort of house you are entering.
A nice clean home with carpets, I’d remove my shoes.
A sticky mess or wooden/laminate etc and I’d keep them on.
We take our shoes off before walking on our carpets here at home, so I’d do the same for others in general.

Hard floors on, carpets off.