To take my child's house key away when

[avenueq]

... yes, when?
When they go to uni? When they set up in their own home?
Never?
I still have a key to my mother's house, but because I live in another country and only go for extended visits it's not like I ever go unannounced - does that make a difference?

Oh and both our children and their partners have keys for our home. Because it's OUR home. All of us. I'd rather discover a twenty-something has somewhat unexpectedly reappeared than discover they'd spent the night stuck somewhere.

My parents are 75, still have mine - they have a tumble dryer

I know where the spare key is though so could always get in if needed.

I have a key to my parents house. And my in-laws. Mostly because I might need to pop by (we live 20 minutes from each other) and drop something off/pick something up or take a present/card or something. Sometimes I let myself into my mums and walk their dog, sometimes I let myself into my in-laws and raid my grandmother in laws clothes chest or have a look through the soft toys on the spare bed because my sons left one there that he can’t part with.
Or like yesterday when I let myself into my in-laws to pick up a birthday cake, then went to my mums and just hung out with the dog until they came home from work. Never occoured to me to hand my key back!
I also have a key to both my Nan house and my grandparents bungalow. Never think twice about itz

I don’t actually remember when I stopped having a key to my mums house, probably after uni when I moved out permanently and was living hundreds of miles away so not exactly going to pop round unannounced.

I lived with my dad for a while but gave my key back when I moved out, again he lives hundreds of miles from me so no reason to have one!

Neither of my parents have ever had keys to my home.

I don’t think there’s a set age, it depends on how your life and their life pan out. Plenty of my friends and their parents are in and out of each other’s houses constantly so have each other’s keys. Or if they end up living far away there’s no practical reason to keep it but equally there’s no harm in it either.

My adult DC have keys to my house.

Just in case....

I'm 51 and I still have a key for the front door. When I lost it a few years ago my Dad got me another. When I call in I walk past the front door and use the back door which is unlocked.

My DSis and her DH and her DC (adults) all have keys to my DMs house.

I do not.

I understand how this has happened, but it still hurts a little. I have driven the hour and a half to her house, totally expected, but had to wait outside, because mum was not home yet.

All the others live two minutes up the road.

I'm in my 50's and still have a key to Mums, even though she has moved house three times since I moved out.
My grown kids have moved out and know where the key is, but there is usually one of us home anyway, they just walk in if they come by.

I live 200 miles from my parents but we have each other's keys. Someone needs to be able to gain access if we die. Cheerful!

I wanted them to be able to get in if they arrived for the weekend mid-Friday afternoon while we were at work.

My daughters (31 and 32)still have keys to my house. One knocks at the door if she's visiting, and one lets herself in. I've never expressed a preference for either option - it did use to be their home after all)
I have keys to their houses too (they asked me to have one for emergencies), but I'd never let myself in without them having arranged for me to.

I've never had a key.

All my children have a key to my house. I have a key to all their houses. Makes sense just in case!

I cant imagine ever asking our DC to give their keys back. They will always be welcome in their "home" however old they are.
We also have a key safe just in case they have forgotten theirs.

I still have the key to the house I was born in. My mum died 5 years ago and we sold the house 4 years ago. The new owners have probably changed the locks and I’d never use it, of course, but I can’t bring myself to throw it away.

Both DH and I have keys to our parents houses, and they’ve both moved since we moved out so it’s not even childhood homes! We do knock when we visit but we also know that if DP we’re out we could let ourselves in and make a cuppa and DP wouldn’t mind. My mum has always been clear that her home will always be my home too, no matter how old I am, love her!

I still have my keys to my parents house, although I rarely use them. DH had a key to his parents house until they retired to a new house, which wasn't his childhood home.

I have a key to my parents, as does my sister. We recently got new ones because they got a new front door. We're a "was in the area and thoughts I'd pop in" kind of family so if they aren't in, I might just go in and wait and play with the dog. They have keys to my house for emergencies and because they pop in to feed the cat if we are away.

I've never had a key to my parents house - we never needed one growing up as it was a tiny village, back door always open and key under the pot if we were all out for the day.

I have a key to my boyfriends parents' house which they gave me when I moved in with him and they have a key to ours.

MyDM moved house last year. My DF is dead.

I haven't been given or offered a key to her new place.

This really hurts.

Her horrible shit of a boyfriend has one. This rankles. I try not to show I care.

I’m 40 and I have my parents keys. I still knock when I visit. If they’re out I can let myself in and make a cuppa while I wait. If they’re taken ill or there’s an emergency I can get in without breaking the door down. If they’re out all day I can pop in and let the dog out for a wee. If they’re on holiday I can check the house and water the plants and put the heating on when they’re due back. If they’re in hospital I can fetch stuff for them. I don’t just wander into their house unannounced but it’s useful to have a key. My parents have my key too, for the same reasons.

Im 40 and have a key to my
Parents. Always have. When i lived over an hour away and when i lived 8 minutes away.

My sister is 38 and had hers taken off her because she
‘Borrows’ my mum’s
Clothes, makes her toddler meals, gives him a bath and leaves an absolute tip behind when she goes home.

We have a key to my in laws. Even when we moved we got a key to their new house.

I still have the set of keys to my parents' house I was given as a young teenager. I've not lived there for 20 years. I use it when they're away but wouldn't let myself in when they're in residence. I don't generally carry it with me.
We also had a key to DH's parents house until they moved from the old family home. Have never been given one to their new place, but it's a sheltered flat so I guess in an emergency the warden would let us in.

I gave mine back when we sold the house after Ddad died