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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To ask how old you were?

586 replies

HarrysOwl · 12/04/2019 07:35

When you got married? (If you're married!)

I was reading a BBC article about a woman talking about the judgement and negativity she encountered when she announced her engagement aged 22.

I was 32 when I married DH. We were together for 3 years, got engaged then lived together for another 4 years before having our wedding. I wanted to be as sure as I could be and felt no rush.

Is there a general judgement with feminist overtones about getting married so young? Are they doomed to divorce?

OP posts:
BikeRunSki · 14/04/2019 08:29

29, DH was 24

mrshousty · 14/04/2019 09:01

Met hubby at 20, moved in together at 28, engaged at 29, married at 33, first baby at 33, second at 38, I'm 39 in June and he'll be 40 in May.

I wanted to get married around 25 years old but he was anti marriage but I was anti kids unless I was married. Took me 9 years to talk him into it 🤣

Ncjustforthisone111 · 14/04/2019 09:04
  1. I have school friends who were celebrating their 20th wedding anniversaries around the same time I got married!
Olissa8 · 14/04/2019 09:11
  1. Had three children and divorced by 31. I think it would have ended badly however old I'd been, with hindsight. I was single for the next 6.5 years and although I now have a lovely DP (and a small DD3) I don't think I'll get married again. I certainly won't have a "wedding".
Newmumma83 · 14/04/2019 09:12

Met husband aged 24 ... married him aged 34 I was judged for taking so long ( it was expense to be honest ) x

bubblegumunicorn · 14/04/2019 10:52

I think it’s more that people don’t see the need get married anymore a lot of people still do but it’s more socially acceptable to never get married than it ever has been! So it’s odd to get engaged young now I know some people who got married very young and others who’s have been together 20 years and never plan to marry! I was 26 when I got married and a lot of my friends have got/are getting married in the 18months since so she might feel young at 22 but give it 36 months and it won’t be that weird 🤷‍♀️

Mummyontherocks · 14/04/2019 11:10

I was 18, lots of judgement at the time and everyone assumed I was pregnant. I wasn't, I had my eldest when I was 30 and I'm still happily married - 23 years now. I don't think age matters, being prepared to work on your relationship matters.

retirementrocks · 14/04/2019 11:43

Met DH when I was 23, married at 30 and have been married for 33 years this year. Best decision I ever made!

Mamacute · 14/04/2019 12:34

Wow !
Congratulations!

Riv · 14/04/2019 12:43

Met at 30, married within the year. Just celebrated 30th anniversary. Looking forward to the next 30 😀

ShowMeTheKittens · 14/04/2019 13:41

Married 28 divorced 15 years later

Myusernameisunique · 14/04/2019 13:45

Met when I was 19, engaged at 21 and married at 23. Married for 9 years now, 2DCs and we've been together for 13 years!

OopsOhNoZHM · 14/04/2019 13:55

Never married but met my ex at 19, engaged at 21, didn’t get any comments until we announced we were expecting our first baby the following year. Then we got all the ‘you’re getting married before the baby arrives, right?’ That was from people our own age, which surprised me. I don’t need to sign a contract with someone to be a good parent. That was the start of the end for my desire to be married 🤷🏼‍♀️ We separated when I was 27. I don’t imagine I’ll get married in the future.

princesscallie · 14/04/2019 13:56

Met when we were 18! Engaged at 25 and married at 26! 2 kids married for 8 years. Hasn't all been a bed of roses but we are currently very happy! Who knows what the future holds but having been together for almost 16 years now we ain't doing too bad!

Dowser · 14/04/2019 14:02

23 and 63

itsonlysubterfuge · 14/04/2019 14:03

DH and I met when we were 15 when we started an online relationship. We met in person at 17. Engaged at 20, married at 21. We just celebrated our 11 year anniversary. Very happy together.

fluffiphlox · 14/04/2019 14:04

Knew each other at 20-ish
Got together at 22
Married at 27
Been married 34 years.

JustDanceAddict · 14/04/2019 14:07

28

moglovesredroses · 14/04/2019 14:07

First one @ 23. Lasted 2 1/2 years
Second one @ 33 after being together 3 years. Still going 6 years later Smile

Madison119 · 14/04/2019 14:19

Met at 20 and married at 27

RoisinXena · 14/04/2019 14:41

My sister was 20 when she got married, never lived with her husband before marriage at this year they will be celebrating their 42nd anniversary.

BackBoiler · 14/04/2019 15:24

I got married at 20. I am now 34 and we have three kids

Drogonssmile · 14/04/2019 16:39

Met when I was 28 and married when I was 34. Been married 3 years this year. Have two DC. Got married when pregnant with the second.

giveovermypreciousss · 14/04/2019 16:47
  1. But I married 4 days before my 23rd birthday. Still married 10 years later.
Stravapalava · 14/04/2019 16:53

27 when I was married. This was young in the town where I come from, but about average in the town I was living in at the time.

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