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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To ask how old you were?

586 replies

HarrysOwl · 12/04/2019 07:35

When you got married? (If you're married!)

I was reading a BBC article about a woman talking about the judgement and negativity she encountered when she announced her engagement aged 22.

I was 32 when I married DH. We were together for 3 years, got engaged then lived together for another 4 years before having our wedding. I wanted to be as sure as I could be and felt no rush.

Is there a general judgement with feminist overtones about getting married so young? Are they doomed to divorce?

OP posts:
MadameJosephine · 13/04/2019 23:04

I was 22 when I got married and divorced at 30

lornz · 13/04/2019 23:12

Met at 18.
Engaged at 21.
Married at 23.

I'm now nearly 27 so heading towards 9 years together and 4 married :) one bambino in tow and hoping for a number 2 in the not so distant future :).

Weathermonger · 13/04/2019 23:21

Met my future husband when I was 14. Married at 22, celebrating 33rd Anniversary this year.

Helenisat29 · 13/04/2019 23:47

I was 19 when I met my husband. We got engaged on the second date, married six months later, and we've recently celebrated 46 years together. Smile

Cryalot2 · 13/04/2019 23:48

A few days before 27th birthday. Been rough the last few

Helenisat29 · 13/04/2019 23:49

Oh, and hoping to welcome our first Grandchild in August. SmileSmileSmile

jaynelovesagathachristie · 14/04/2019 00:24

I'm 32, he's 37 still not married after 12 years 2 kids and a mortgage.

Linnet · 14/04/2019 00:53

25

Scrumptelicious · 14/04/2019 01:19

Met when we were 17. Started going out when we were 20.
Got married at 28 and are married 10 years.

DianaPrincessOfThemyscira · 14/04/2019 01:33

Met at 21, had babies at 26 and 29 and married at 29.

Fuck me. That's a long time.

DianaPrincessOfThemyscira · 14/04/2019 01:35

And regarding the age thing, I didn't have any, and while I wouldn't comment I do think doing anything before the age of 25 (mortgage, kids, marriage) that isn't easily reversed is madness. Obviously it works for a lot of people though!

CremeEggThief · 14/04/2019 01:38

Started living together at 19.
Married at 25.
Divorced at 36, after 2 years separation.

bettythebutterfly · 14/04/2019 02:19

Met at 21, married at 25, had first DC at 35. Married 18yrs now.

Catsinthecupboard · 14/04/2019 05:24

29 years ago married. Met around 25. Married 28. Children 35 and 38.

My stupid sil said she thought i would be an "old maid.:

She met my brother at 15, married at 20. She's a narcissist and he's crazy. Confused

MijasMaddie · 14/04/2019 05:32

I was around 27. A toddler and a baby!

flumpybear · 14/04/2019 06:23

33, married a week before our 10th anniversary together. That was 14 years ago

Jimjamjools · 14/04/2019 06:35

Engaged at 19, married at 22. Recieved a lot of criticism from people at the time who felt they had the authority to comment that we were throwing our lives away and would change as we got older. Hasn't happened so far, so many years down the line. Even if it does, what an exciting adventure to have been on! And we have a daughter now, who arrived when I was just 25 - again, some criticism that I was throwing my independence away so young.

Lolipop44 · 14/04/2019 06:40

Met at 20 married at 24 he was 36 we've been married 7 years and it gets better every year Smile

user1471452428 · 14/04/2019 07:00

I was 22, we needed visas to be together (UK and USA). Still married and in love 20 years later.

I like knowing who he was when we were young. People who get married in their thirties and forties always seem to be negotiating.

user1471452428 · 14/04/2019 07:02

Also didn't have a child for ten years. Too busy having fun!

omione · 14/04/2019 07:16

I was 17 and it was way too young,i wasnt pregnant so why the hell i was so stupid i will never know. I really didnt know my own mind until i was nearly 30. Your twenties should be about you and you alone

Angelicinnocent · 14/04/2019 07:21

Met at 19.
Married 18 months later at 21.
Kids at 24 and 27.
Still together 24 years later.

Daisymaybe60 · 14/04/2019 08:27

Met at 17, finished college and worked abroad together for 2 years, got married at 22. Three children by 29, still happily married 42 years later, with 4 grandchildren.

Standard for the time. DSis was the one who was judged for not marrying till 27. Smile

TheGoogleMum · 14/04/2019 08:27

Met aged 20, engaged just before 26, married age 28. Divorce rates are high so I think nowadays it's more expected that you'll wait longer to be certain and start getting a career established before starting family. I guess when people get married young nowadays as it's less the done thing it feels like rushing or like they haven't experienced enough of life. We all do a lot of growing up in our early 20s I think and if you grow apart instead of together you may regret marrying so young. In my parents generation marrying young was the norm and I think they grew up sooner. My parents still waited till nearly 30 to start having kids though

Fruityb · 14/04/2019 08:28

35!

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