Do you post pictures of your children on social media?

[Leefygreen]

I use social media quite a lot, I've been posting pictures of DC since I started to use facebook and then instagram so when my oldest was around 4 and there's pictures of my other children from birth to now. It's nice to have them there to look back on but I do wonder sometimes whether I should, I find some of my own childhood pictures a bit embarrasing. My DC aren't too bothered by it, youngest is too young understand, middle one couldn't care less, my oldest is a teenager now so she cares a little more and I ask her permission before posting anything of her. Most people I know also post pictures of their DC regularly, I only know a couple who don't at all

If your SIL wants to upload photos of her children without their informed consent, then hopefully she's owning that instead of blaming other family members, not having their contact details etc

Well her kids are in their teens and the family photos she puts up are are a lot less incriminating than the ones the kids put up of themselves!
They've all been told about how things can appear on fb but in a couple of years time when they are in their 20s I think some of them, are going to cringe when Timehop pops up!

Any way it's not my job to police other people's face book stings!

To be honest, I don't fully understand why some people are so serious about 'children haven't consented to the photo being on social media'. There are lots of things parents do that kids don't 'consent' to by the simple fact that they are children and it's the parents that have responsibility to consent on their behalf.

To those that don't agree about photos going on social media then do you also think we shouldn't take photos of kids at all, because they haven't consented to be in the photo?

And actually if it's about consent then why is it acceptable to email photos instead of social media? Surely if they can't consent to sharing via social media then they also can't consent to sharing via any other format either?

I tend to share already published photos of my DC on my Facebook - they are photos that have been taken because of hobbies each of them is involved in. More personal photos are shared occasionally but only with the DCs' agreement, always fully clothed and never doing anything potentially embarrassing. My Facebook is fairly closed and I'm picky about which groups within my friends list are able to access photos of my DC.

I post photos on fb of all 3, tighter settings. I post older 2 on insta, open account with their permission (teenagers with their own accounts)

And actually if it's about consent then why is it acceptable to email photos instead of social media? Surely if they can't consent to sharing via social media then they also can't consent to sharing via any other format either?

Because quite simply, if/when that child becomes a teenager and struggles with low self-esteem due to their looks/weight/hair/body image etc, how is that parent going to get across to them that looks don't matter, when that exact same parent has been sharing their images and sitting back enjoying all the 'Oohhs/aahhs/likes/hearts on their own social media?

It's not about taking photos and showing family/friends...parents have done that for as long as cameras have been around.

It's about parents not doing it privately anymore and not owning the fact they're doing it for themselves, because it's certainly not in the interest of the child who has no control over it.

If likes and love hearts means that much to a person, either post photos of yourself or your pets, but don't get your ego boost through your kid's images and pretend it's because famileee apparently need to see them on a social media platform.

Or if you do insist on getting your boost that way, at least be prepared to admit that that's what it is and think about how you might deal with your image conscious teen in the future.

No

Don’t feel the need to

No absolutely not. I don’t have any of those social media platforms anyway. They are so boring and constantly seeing pictures of other people’s kids was just tedious. Nobody cares. You aren’t Beyoncé. Everyone thinks they’re a celebrity these days. Get over yourself!

I care, I love seeing pictures of my friend's and family's children

No one can “access” Facebook photos if you’ve got your privacy settings properly set, it doesn’t matter how clever they are

Which would be fine if FB didn't regularly change the way those settings work. I recall at least three occasions in recent years where unannounced changes resulted in pictures being made visible on friends' accounts which they thought were protected.

I never put my children's pictures on public hosts, I didn't allow anyone else to inasfar as I could stop it.

I did share pictures by email and also hosted them myself so that grandparents could download a bundle of them (in the days when big attachments meant slow email).

It never seemed appropriate to assume a child's consent to being put online. As adults they tell me they are glad they were not documented in public in real time - of course they may just be humouring me, but all are careful about what they publish themselves.

Nobody cares. You aren’t Beyoncé. Everyone thinks they’re a celebrity these days. Get over yourself!

Kinda mean spirited really.

Fine, you don’t like them. But lots (in fact billions) of people are signed up so there must be some appeal.

I don’t post much myself, but I love seeing how extended family are doing.

Mine is private and locked up tight due to my job. We have family in far flung places and they love keeping up with what the kids are doing. So much easier to post a pic of child with certificate and "Oh well done X!" And then 20 rellies comment than do some mad private group thing.

My FB is private and my only FB friends are family members and close friends

I do post my children’s photos, with their permission (they’re teens).

I don’t post much and never post anything embarrassing or ‘cute’ - a photo of all 4 of us at a wedding, DD2 does loads of horse riding so I post photos of her at events, stuff like that

I do but with my older child (8) I ask her permission first and have done since she was about 6. I'll do the same with youngest when he's older.

Facebook do change their settings on occasions, as do all social media sites. However, these are normally announced - especially in recent times. And despite being on Facebook for many many years, through several setting changes, not once has Facebook gone in and made any changes to my privacy settings. I've never had my accounts, posts or photographs suddenly become visible.

I personally don't, I don't agree with it...
Once a photograph is online anybody can get hold of it, you don't own the photo anymore. Regardless of how "tight" you have an account secured.

Family members respect my wishes and do not post, the same as my friends. As far as I see it, if anybody wants to see my child or what they look like than they can contact me or come round and see them.

Have also deleted social media too..

There are more photos of them on my actual walls and more photos posted by their activities or local events online than I have posted to my little locked down account with around twenty people on it - and my tiny pile of nice childhood photos are on there as well.

I ask my kids and we all discuss how once it's out there, it's out there and the various places that have permission to post their photos and that plenty of places don't need to have permission when it's at places like public events or similar.

I have mixed feelings about one of my old high schools that posts a ton of photos of students on their social media these days because I'm not sure I'd be that comfortable if it were my kids, but then I'm also kinda envious that I don't have any photos of me in high school and wish it was as easy as looking up their facebook to see me doing sports or whatever so I could show my kids.

The idea that people only show their friends and family photos of their children to get a narcissistic ego boost is deeply weird, and smacks of jealousy.

How? I have a camera, 3 kids and a Facebook account.

I don’t know anyone who doesn’t post pics of their kids, and no one even blinks at it. In the real world it’s a completely normal thing to do and certainly nothing to do with ego or getting attention.

This does not make it right and it's not done for the benefit of the child, who afterall are the subject of the photos.

Again, how are parents going to explain to anxious body-conscious teens that their looks aren't that important?

Worra do you post any photos at all on Facebook/social media? Obviously you don't of your children but any other kind?

RainbowFox yes, I sometimes post photos of me, especially at work events.

I post them because I enjoy showing people how much fun the events are and how silly/good I look in the fancy dress costumes we wear. I don't pretend to post them for any other reason or pretend that I need to show family etc.

Posting photos is something I do purely for myself and my own enjoyment. I own that - hence not posting photos of my kids when they were younger and then having to look them in the eye as teenagers, while telling them their looks aren't all that important.

They're old enough now to post their own photos of themselves. They don't post other people's without their permission and wouldn't dream of posting photos of children, because they understand they can't give their informed consent.

I live in a different country to my family and friends. I enjoy seeing what they're up to on FB and vice versa. I post family photos, not specifically of DD, but of us and our extended family here. My Facebook is private, I don't have 500 friends. It's not a problem for me, DP, DD or the majority of people who are on my FB and post the same. I have a friend on FB who has a very senior job in child services and his wife is a police officer working in the same field. They both post pictures of their kids on FB. It's a lot more concerning what older kids post on their own Instagram,TikTok, Facebook accounts than the harmless family snaps most parents post.