Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To have cancelled and refunded this?

414 replies

Bottletopsx · 08/04/2019 09:51

I have an online shop. Message below from a customer.

I cancelled and refunded her as I am obviously too stupid to post her item!! Cheeky Cow! Angry

Hi there. I'm ordering this for a master's degree project and would appreciate the most expedited shipping I can afford. Not that you could possibly know what that is, but I'm willing to pay a bit more to get it sooner if that's at all possible. Thanks!

OP posts:
BloodyDisgrace · 08/04/2019 13:20

Both made a mistake here; the customer worded it awkwardly and OP had a knee-jerk reaction. As if stuff like this never happens ever. Is it common to call a mistaken person a dumbarse and make an entertainment for yourself out of it? I should hope not.

But, from a point of view of social engineering, an interesting thing happened here: OP first introduced an idea that someone might think she is "stupid". Then a sheer wealth of posters picked up the idea, like it's safe now to call her that. Strength in numbers. Quite a nasty social dynamic here. User Eliza got some shit too ... Maybe it's normal banter though, and, say, your kid made a mistake and other children at the schoolyard, good 10-20 of them, laughed at it you'd be fine too.

LondonJax · 08/04/2019 13:20

Agreed @sailorcherries. I have all my delivery options listed - although I've been emailed asking if I can use a courier (which would have cost more than the item but I came up with a solution using the shipping I usually use). Very strange to not have that in the sales blurb.

Vertigoo · 08/04/2019 13:26

Both made a mistake here; the customer worded it awkwardly and OP had a knee-jerk reaction. As if stuff like this never happens ever. Is it common to call a mistaken person a dumbarse and make an entertainment for yourself out of it? I should hope not.

Bit isn’t that exactly why the OP posted this thread in the first place? To ridicule a customer’s apparent arrogance?
If you’re prepared to dish out etc..

HeadsDownThumbsUpEveryone · 08/04/2019 13:28

Is it common to call a mistaken person a dumbarse and make an entertainment for yourself out of it?

That is literally what the Op did though. She thought that the sender of the message was being a cheeky cow and for her own amusement she then posted the message onto an internet forum for other to agree with her and in turn mock the sender. Hmm

BloodyDisgrace · 08/04/2019 13:32

Some people are more likely than others to take something personally and wrongly, when it wasn't intended. I wouldn't laugh at them. Yes, she called a customer "a cheeky cow" here - not great, but people here clearly went overboard at avenging the poor customer, in my view.

NaughtToThreeSadOnions · 08/04/2019 13:32

is it common to call a mistaken person a dumbarse and make an entertainment for yourself out of it?

Is it common to call a customer making a reasonable requestion for information a checky cow and refuse to fulfill tje order and post about it on social media???

DeaflySilence · 08/04/2019 13:38

Well that was straight on the offensive!

I do hope that when you cancelled and refunded, you at least told the poor customer that you wouldn't be sending her (urgently needed) item, @Bottletopsx!

SoupDragon · 08/04/2019 13:39

I also read it several times trying to work out what on Earth was wrong with it.

I don't think there is any indication at all the English isn't the customer's first language though.

whitehalleve · 08/04/2019 13:39

Definitely misinterpreted Grin

LondonJax · 08/04/2019 13:45

@Bloodydisgrace. The OP didn't just have a knee jerk reaction!

They cancelled the order, refunded the customer then decided 'oh, I'll post that on Mumsnet because ...'they would think I was right/they'd get a kick out of it/I'll get little lol's all over the post/I'll get a pat on the back for showing the customer who's boss' delete as necessary or add your own possible reason why the OP would post.

The point is it wasn't a knee jerk reaction.

Cancelling the order was, but putting the story on Mumsnet was a conscious decision and it's that decision that shows the OP as being very petty, not the cancellation of the order. The decision that they decided it was a great idea to laugh at the fact that a customer now won't get what they need for their work was not knee jerk.

MissLadyM · 08/04/2019 13:45

You're clearly too stupid to read an email properly! It was a perfectly nice request to give her options on express delivery etc as she wants the item quickly. Poor woman! You're an idiot and have made it clear to the buyer and everyone on this thread.

Samind · 08/04/2019 13:48

I definitely agree with other posters that you've misinterpreted. She definitely meant that you wouldn't of known off the top of your head how quick it was to post said item.

Samind · 08/04/2019 13:50

How quickly and cost effective*

DontDribbleOnTheCarpet · 08/04/2019 13:50

I've been selling online for nearly 15 years now, and while I wouldn't have cancelled in this case, I can see why it might happen.

It's Monday, which is often the busiest and most pressured day of the week for online sales and also the peak time for "interesting" messages. It isn't uncommon for buyers to pay only for second class delivery but demand express (although this buyer hasn't done that) and these orders have a habit of going badly wrong at a later stage. So it could almost be a reflex because something has pinged on the OP's radar. It wasn't well handled, obviously, but I think most people have got into a stressy state at work at some point and made a regrettable decision.

A lot depends on the platform OP is selling on. On eBay I am more inclined to cancel at the first sign of trouble, but am less inclined to do so on Amazon or my own website.

One essential tip I'd pass on to the OP though, is this; if you absolutely must ridicule your customers, do it on a closed forum of likeminded people. This is not the place, it's far too public.

SuddenlyISee · 08/04/2019 13:51

Brilliant 😂

Topseyt · 08/04/2019 13:53

Oh dear, OP! What a clanger you have dropped there.

I too had to read the customer's message several times in order to try and understand what you could possibly have found offensive about it. I couldn't find anything.

She didn't expect you to know what her budget was, but she just wanted to know what the options for shipping and delivery were, and their costs. She was willing to pay extra for a faster delivery once you furnished her with the information.

Her wording was a bit awkward, but not at all offensive.

You must have tried really hard to take offence at that. I think that if possible you should get back to her and apologise profusely.

DantesInferno · 08/04/2019 13:53

Are you able to reinstate the order? Are they likely to be repeat customers?

InMyCorner · 08/04/2019 13:54

Look you big thicko, I know you couldn't possibly know what expedited shipping means but post me my item pronto yeah?

Gollum in Harry Potter 🤣🤣🤣🤣

Topseyt · 08/04/2019 14:00

Get back to her. Apologise for the howler and offer to reinstate the order, funding the expedited delivery costs yourself by way of a goodwill gesture.

Then you might just get or retain a new customer. Unless you also sent her a shitty message as you cancelled and refunded, in which case you have lost it.

BestestBrownies · 08/04/2019 14:04

Well this thread has been an eye-opener!

Only in England can using 'big words' in the English language be construed as a negative jibe toward the listener/receiver.

Let's not even start with having the audacity to also spell those big words correctly.....

ChrisPrattsFace · 08/04/2019 14:05

What was the item? I’m intrigued.

CocoCharlie83 · 08/04/2019 14:07

I can picture the OP 2 years from now waking up in the middle of the night and not being able to get back asleep as their brain cringes at how hard they failed in this situation.

OP what show can we expect to see you on, Dragons Den or the Apprentice?

TokyoSushi · 08/04/2019 14:07

GrinGrinGrin

Contraceptionismyfriend · 08/04/2019 14:10

@BestestBrownies I think the correct use of spelling and grammar was the biggest insult of them all Wink

BruceAndNosh · 08/04/2019 14:10

This is why punctuation (and always assuming the best in people) matters

Punctuation is the difference between Knowing your shit and Knowing you're shit

Swipe left for the next trending thread