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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be upset that I've gone into labour a week before my planned c section, and the hospital are telling me not to come in?

341 replies

Elmo311 · 02/04/2019 07:35

Just that really!
Having contractions since yesterday morning. Early stage labour still, but they are getting more painful each time.
I called L&D, explained my situation and why I'm having a c section this time (3 day labour with my son, failure to progress past 3cm, and 11months age difference between them both)
BUT they still told me to wait?! She said i don't sound in enough pain to come in?!
Thats 1) because I'm calling inbetween contractions and 2) probably because I'm not that far along yet.

I just do not understand why i have to go through this pain when a c section has been agreed?
Sorry i know I'm ranting a bit but i just don't understand their thinking and no matter what way i worded the question i still go told to wait :(

Any advice? AIBU to be frustrated?!

Thanks for reading

OP posts:
Original poster
Elmo311 · 02/04/2019 10:42

Seriously though...where are the contractions gone?! Ugh. How embarrassing if after all of this they've stopped.
24hrs of them and now nothing? Now that I'm where i should be... grr.

OP posts:
poundoflard · 02/04/2019 10:45

Mine were like that, both my first and second labours, I was induced, both ended up as Em c/s .

Stay put, you know if you leave they'll ramp up again Grin

Melroses · 02/04/2019 10:48

Not unusual!

Don't be in a hurry to go.

gnushoes · 02/04/2019 10:49

all my labours were stop start until they really got going - which for DC 2 and 3 were under an hour till birth! Contractions all night, nothing all day for several days at least. Good luck.

littlepeas · 02/04/2019 10:50

Good luck OP!

ohwhattodowithmylife · 02/04/2019 11:00

Good luck x

QueenKubauOfKish · 02/04/2019 11:23

I'm a bit late to this but assuming contractions do continue, keep asking for consultant and asking for your CS.

I had this happen and the pressure put on me by midwives to try for a vbac was immense, despite the fact that the consultant had very keenly agreed to a CS because my disastrous previous experience and EMCS after failure to dilate. They even said "we can always use forceps" in a breezy kind of way - just NO.

I had to wait all day for emergencies to go in first, but I stood my ground and got my CS that evening.

Midwives seem to think IME that vaginal is always best, but you know your body and what you can handle and they agreed to a CS for a reason.

StoppinBy · 02/04/2019 11:29

Stress is the biggest killer of labour progression, when we are stressed our body wants to shut labour down to keep baby safe.

My first was a 3 day labour, no progression, induction and a c/s. Second was an attempted VBAC, similar labour and a c/s, I don't regret the second labour at all though.

The best thing you can do for now is to go about your normal routine and try to relax, whatever ends up happening from here on I wish you all the best, whether you end up with a vaginal or c/s birth xx

Original poster
Elmo311 · 02/04/2019 11:33

Hi All!
So I'm 1cm dilated (failure to progress much!) And having moderate contractions again.
Waiting for a consultant to come and speak to me! Will update again soon xxx Thanks everyone for the support, you give me strength!

OP posts:
ajandjjmum · 02/04/2019 11:35

Good Luck Elmo!

HattieRabbit · 02/04/2019 11:35

I know It sucks OP but just because a C section was agreed and planned for 1 week from now, doesn’t mean you should be rushed in and given one if you’re not an emergency.

DH is a Dr (performs c sections) and to be ‘rushed in and given one’ you’d been to be a cat 1 (yours/babies life in danger) and they usually only have enough staff to perform 1-2 of these at a time. 🤔

By all means go into the hospital but unless you genuinely feel justified taking one of those ‘emergency’ teams away from another labouring woman whose life/babies life may actually be in serious danger, please don’t go kicking off about how you ‘want’ a c-section. It’s not the NHS’s fault that baby is coming a week early 💐

You might go in, be in labour for 12 hours- then be given a c-section because things don’t progress/get worse, and I’m sure you’ll feel like ‘why didn’t they just give me it immediately’ but the NHS have to prioritise. It sucks being in pain but they have limited resources and ‘it happened last time’ doesn’t give you priority over another woman who is currently more of a priority than you are xx

HattieRabbit · 02/04/2019 11:38

Super good luck though 😍

Must admit I didn’t RTFT just responded to OP- if it were me in your shoes I’d have been frustrated too!

QueenKubauOfKish · 02/04/2019 11:40

Totally agree emergencies must come first, unless or until you yourself need an EMCS! But it's fine to say you want a CS if at all possible and not let them push you down the vbac path.

AdoraBell · 02/04/2019 11:41

Glad you went in. Good luck.

BlueSkiesLies · 02/04/2019 11:44

By all means go into the hospital but unless you genuinely feel justified taking one of those ‘emergency’ teams away from another labouring woman whose life/babies life may actually be in serious danger, please don’t go kicking off about how you ‘want’ a c-section. It’s not the NHS’s fault that baby is coming a week early

What a totally twatty thing to say.

You don’t ‘take away’ medical care from someone mor deserving. Medical staff prioritise according to need. If the OP has a higher medical need she will have a C section. Fucks sake.

‘My hisband is a ‘ doesn’t make you the fucking c section morality police.

Original poster
Elmo311 · 02/04/2019 11:47

@HattieRabbit Of course i understand all that, and I'm definitely not 'kicking off' as I'm not that kinda person. They have acknowledged that i need a c section, and they are keeping me in. I'm still waiting to speak to a consultant though.

I also do not want to turn into an emergency c section, and I'm happy to wait for my c section. I'm happier now I'm being monitored.

OP posts:
Sitdownstandup · 02/04/2019 11:48

Not at all uncommon OP. I had similar in one of my labours. Make the point that you're worried about the labour stopping and starting, and stalling, to the extent that you become exhausted and are unable to push. If you have an 11 month old CS scar you're not exactly a good candidate for syntocin.

By all means go into the hospital but unless you genuinely feel justified taking one of those ‘emergency’ teams away from another labouring woman whose life/babies life may actually be in serious danger, please don’t go kicking off about how you ‘want’ a c-section. It’s not the NHS’s fault that baby is coming a week early

So much stupid in one post.

Original poster
Elmo311 · 02/04/2019 11:48

@BlueSkiesLies Thank you

OP posts:
Original poster
Elmo311 · 02/04/2019 11:49

@HattieRabbit Thank you! Glad to know I'm not being 'out of order!' X

OP posts:
AintNobodyHereButUsReindeer · 02/04/2019 11:51

Good luck Elmo! Hope everything goes well Flowers

GaryWilmottsTeeth · 02/04/2019 11:51

It sucks being in pain but they have limited resources and ‘it happened last time’ doesn’t give you priority over another woman who is currently more of a priority than you are

No, but labouring pointlessly on an 11 month old CS scar might. Hmm

stucknoue · 02/04/2019 11:53

My experience was I didn't progress with either labours until the broke my waters, first time I didn't know of course but my (luckily) experienced midwife had a hunch and an hour later dd was born after 6 hours of no progression. Second time I told them and after a bit of persuasion they did it and went from 4-10 in 30 mins. It's worth investigating if you do delivery naturally. It's probable that the elective list is full today and if there's already one or two emergencies they simply haven't capacity until later.

fluffylittleclouds · 02/04/2019 11:54

I would say OP is perfectly entitled to ‘want’ a c-section 11 months after an EMCS, whether she goes into labour early or not Confused

Sitdownstandup · 02/04/2019 11:56

Shush gary, her husband is a doctor donchaknow!

spiderlight · 02/04/2019 11:58

Good luck!!