To be disappointed with the school mums

[tipsandtricks]

Supposedly “naice” area, private school (which may or may not make a difference, I don’t know) and some of the mothers are just not nice people!

They gossip, they show off, they try to manipulate the teachers (and it works with some), they do not discipline their children, they are competitive to the point of making nasty remarks to 4 year olds if they have won a prize and their child hasn’t and they flout the school rules (hair length, uniform, no fighting) because they are paying so “what are they going to do?!” 😕

I don’t know what I was expecting but this is like a group of mean girls who have had children and still think they are in the playground.

It’s a shame if you don’t make a single friend via this stage of your life. You are “thrown together” in the same way you are with your own school mates, university peers and work colleagues yet making friends with them is seen as perfectly acceptable yet making friends with fellow parents seen as sad or “living your life through the school”. Never understood that one.

Couldn't have put it better myself.

I think people who studiously avoid the school gate, take pride in dumping and running, etc, are either incredibly shy, socially anxious, or just socially inept.

I don't understand why you'd go out of your way to avoid school mums as a cohort, over all other humans.

When I'm at work, I'm not a School Mum. Hopefully none of my school mum-hating colleagues is inadvertently talking to me on the assumption that I'm a normal human. Maybe I should wear a badge or something to warn them not to get too close. 🤣

Met through kids but friends now -kids an irrelevance. Most of the kids not friends any more. Have far more interesting things to talk about than kids or school.

The thing you should be doing is suggesting to the Head that more support is provided to those teachers whom you think are being manipulated.

Rich or well-off people being unpleasant is not something confined to mothers dropping children off at school. Philip Green probably never dropped his children off, for example.

I think people who are conspicuously over involved and active at the school gate, those whontake pride in participation,pta and coffee mornings and events etc, are either incredibly shy, socially anxious, or just socially inept.

Slagging off “school mums” is actually pretty misogynistic

Only if it’s fallcious. If it’s a recollection of events,it’s a lived experience

Who takes “pride” in pta or coffee mornings!? You must have met some pretty weird women never met anyone like that personally certainly wouldn’t be friends with them.

Who takes pride?PTA & alphamums and no I certainly don’t want to be friends with them and I’m not

I think I you have been watching too many episodes of desperate housewives most women are nothing like that

“
I think people who studiously avoid the school gate, take pride in dumping and running, etc, are either incredibly shy, socially anxious, or just socially inept”

The ones who “take pride” in it are the ones who think they are a step above the “mundanes”.

Their loss. Women I’ve met through kids certainly livened up my 0s. Some coming over tonight lipstick would you like to join

40s

By all means MsSwift, I’ll call an Uber.only rule is No talking about school

Absolutely not

ok I’ll bring Manchebo cheese,olives and a quiche
You're in the big house with the helipad,yeah?

I don’t suppose school mums know what manchego is. Good you added the “cheese” to give them a hint.

I take it this is not a proper public school type of school. We have one of those in our town. The parents aren’t outright horrible but they do dress head to toe in joules all drive and evoke and cackle in their very local accents in little groups at pick up time/don’t say hello to people they don’t know etc and the school has really unreasonable expectations re parents being available during the day etc. The school we sent our son to is a proper old fashioned prep school. Everyone there is absolutely lovely.

proper old fashioned prep school
Does one get an improper proper old fashioned prep school?

@lipstick

A Montessori one maybe?

I do like a bit of impropriety

i've always managed to keep away from school gate mums, as some schools we were only allowed to drop and go.
Unfortunately, I get to attend founders Day and see the kids dressed in 15th Century dress, and listen to lots of warbling.

The parents at the state primary school my DS went to were frankly toxic. The amount of bitching & posing in the playground was unbelievable, it was like a fashion show with the mum's bitching. I found the best approach was to wear my ear buds when I went in the playground & surf on my phone, don't go in until just before the bell goes at either end of the day & once my DS was old enough he walked to meet me at the car. Just don't engage with them, don't get involved with their mind games.

A school dating to 15c that’s impressive,does it have any original buildings

I treat school mum or parents for that matter the same way I do the people at work - just a bunch of people brought together with a common purpose - what ever that may be. Never understood the anti school mums vibe. How can you hate a whole group of people.

lipstick

Yes, it has a library separate from the school that is the oldest library in the English speaking world. Several original old buildings and a brand new part opened a couple of years ago.