WE are pregnant.

[bridgetreilly]

No. No you aren't.

SHE is pregnant and HE is not pregnant. It's not a joint enterprise. You are both expecting a baby, fine. But unless you are the one with the baby growing inside you, you are not pregnant. Not even a little bit.

I said that once in front of DH as we were talking to our chemist . He gave me a WTF look and said afterwards he found it very strange. I didnt do it again.

'This is x, she's carrying my child'

Arghhh! Oh god. No. No!

So long as we BOTH give up booze.

Both start having early nights and not fucking off at weekends

Both give up smoking.

Funny that so rarely happens though.

I hate it - or 'we are in labour' - and I have heard both of them

You are both having a baby - she is the one pregnant and the one in labour

We're in labour would have got a kick in the balls.

So we can share the experience

Jacques, we'll have to agree to differ as I very strongly feel it was you who began 'competitive pregnancy issues' on this thread

Sounds like as soon as a woman gets pregnant then a man should run for the hills, as it is nothing to do with him.

Glad I dont live in MN world.

Sounds like as soon as a woman gets pregnant then a man should run for the hills, as it is nothing to do with him.

Who is saying that? Nobody. He can be involved. He can be excited. He can’t be pregnant.

He can be excited. He can’t be pregnant.
He isn't individually pregnant but he is involved with the pregnancy. So it is perfectly reasonably to say 'WE are pregnant' if that is what they want to say. Language is not set in stone.

Language is not set in stone.

Well, yes. But people are free to disagree with people who use language outside the usual definition. He is a man. A man cannot be pregnant.

I think it depends on the situation. It’s pretty clear if a man is trying to appropriate a woman’s experience (a la Harry from the recent episode of Fleabag).

However, my DH held my hand and gave me every single injection in our 6 rounds of ivf, sobbed with me when 5 of them failed and waited on me hand and foot (and treated me like a goddess) when I was pregnant with our now 5 month old DD. We may have unwittingly got over excited and said ‘we’re pregnant’ to a few people when we were finally able to share our happy news, and I’m now thinking at least some of them were probably sneering at is behind our backs. However, I don’t really give a flying fuck 🤣

He is a man. A man cannot be pregnant
HE is not saying HE is pregnant, they are saying that they are pregnant. Or WE are pregnant. To try and deny men parenthood during pregnancy is a very extreme form of feminism.

To try and deny men parenthood during pregnancy is a very extreme form of feminism.
Clearly you've never encountered actual extreme feminism... I'm pregnant. DP isn't. And yet everyone we tell still manages to grasp the concept that it's his baby and he's going to be a parent. Plus having witnessed my pregnancy (not ours), he's bloody delighted it's a me thing not a we thing.

I just got told off on the other thread for saying this is ridiculous!!

Clearly you've never encountered actual extreme feminism... I'm pregnant

That is completely acceptable. And so is a couple who say "they are pregnant". You do not own language.

I don't own language but I know how to use it correctly. A couple cannot say "they" are pregnant unless there are two simultaneous pregnancies. HTH.

No-one is a parent until a baby is born. If that makes me an extreme feminist so be it.

Sperm donors are not pregnant, prospective adopters are not pregnant, same sex partners are not pregnant unless they actually are the ones growing the babies and prospective fathers of children they have contributed to the making of are not pregnant, no matter how committed they are to the enterprise.

YANBU

I’ve been pregnant twice. Hyperemesis, SPD, all the bells and whistles. If DH had tried to claim “we” were pregnant he probably wouldn’t have lived to meet his first born.

That is completely acceptable. And so is a couple who say "they are pregnant". You do not own language.

Unless they are a lesbian couple who ith happen to be pregnant... they are NOT pregnant.

Just like I can day the moon is made of green cheese, but it is in fact not made of green cheese, and I will be mocked for being so silly.

If I ever said "we had a vasectomy, we're doing just fine". Dh would probably divorce me.

To try and deny men parenthood during pregnancy is a very extreme form of feminism.

Men arent parents to foetuses in utero. They rightfully have no control over the fetus. They can't even decided if the fetus will be born. That's not extreme feminism. Thats biology.