To beg you all to quit moaning about Mothering Sunday

[NorthernLurker]

Every bloody year it's the same - women moaning about not getting anything, moaning about men not doing enough, not doing the right thing.......
Then there's the complaints about the mil wanting some, any, recognition of herself as a mother when madam mumsnetter has given the world the great gift of her bawling infant and thus the day is all about her now and mil can go rot.

The threads have started already and it's SO TEDIOUS.

How about if we are fortunate enough to have our kids alive and well and for a bonus our mums too we just decide that's enough and pack in the moaning. Instead giving our energy to supporting parents without children, children without parents and those who are like mothers to us?

I often feel sorry for the posters on the mother’s day thread but some do make me roll my eyes I read one yesterday who’s reason for hating it seems to focus on her ex one year letting a young excited child take a present in to mummy “too early”

Ds Is autistic so can’t cope with things like Mother’s Day so we don’t bother.

OP, we have 3 birthdays in 6 days (DD1, DD2 and DM) from 27th March, 1st April and 2nd April, plus M's Day on Sunday. Everyone's coming over to ours for dinner!

YANBU At all!

But why shouldn't a new father make sure his partner feel very special on her first Mother's Day?

Send his mum some chocs and flowers, sure (no need to ignore it entirely, obviously), but prioritise his partner for that first year - when she's just undergone a massive medical event most likely to make them ALL parents/grandparents?

Ironically, you make it sound like you feel Mother's Day IS a massive fucking deal if it's such a trauma for a MIL (of either parent) to be sidelined a bit in the new mum's first year.

(I always see my mum the weekend before MD which is her birthday. We go to his family gathering for MD itself. When we have kids, I will want to skip the family gathering - probably in preference for breakfast in bed, then maybe invite the grans around for dinner later.)

Am I allowed to whinge because it's my 40th birthday on Sunday and I can't be arsed to go out for a meal like I originally wanted because everywhere will be packed with people out for mothers day 😐

Yanbu

i think some peoples expectations are way too high and tbh I think a lot of it is so people can compare and show off online.

Are you the mother in law by any chance? Maybe madam mumsnetter would just like a card and a bit of thanks for being a mum. She has just as much right as her own mother or mother in law for a bit of attention from her family.

It’s my first Mother’s Day and I don’t really buy into it. But this year is special and I’m sorry but I will be a bit upset if I get nothing at all. I’ve given up my career, done about 90% of all the baby stuff, worked out all the baby admin and health things and managed to keep the house clean and the fridge stocked with healthy food. Meanwhile, my husband’s day to day kid has carried on’as Normal pretty much. So yes, I’m sorry but it is my turn to have some time in the sun. Luckily my mother and mother in law have had their fill of Mother’s Day after 30 years Plus and know to stand back.

Cup of tea and toast in bed and a hand made card should suffice

That’s it mothers. Know your place

I’ve given up my career, done about 90% of all the baby stuff, worked out all the baby admin and health things and managed to keep the house clean and the fridge stocked with healthy food. Meanwhile, my husband’s day to day kid has carried on’as Normal pretty much. So yes, I’m sorry but it is my turn to have some time in the sun. Luckily my mother and mother in law have had their fill of Mother’s Day after 30 years Plus and know to stand back.

Exactly!

In the first year of mother (and fatherhood), that's pretty much peak parenting. Your child is (fingers crossed) the most dependent they'll ever be, AND it's your first time doing it.

Yes, MILs and FILs of both new mums and dads should take a back seat that year. Bloody weird to suggest otherwise. (Different, of course, if what the new parents want is some big joined up celebration)

Wooo WOOO WOOOO

I fucking hate mother’s day.

It’s one of the busiest days of the year at work. I sweat a lot. Someone shouted at me last year and I cried.

Can I moan about that? I will be grateful to come home to my lovely children but the day itself is mostly shite.

The term "Mothering Sunday" makes my skin crawl.

Op people can post whatever the fuck they like. We don't need permission from YOU.

This is forum for all views. ALL views including those that find mothers day painful, and for those that don't and love a good lie in and a cooked lunch and an amazing day. You have no right to be the thread police and decide what is welcome and what is not.

If you don't like the mother day thread, breaking news, hey you don't have to fucking read it, but you don't get to choose what other people post on here.

There is such a thing as freedom of speech. So just stop being so goady and policing other people's views.

And who cares that it originally had nothing to do with mothers. Traditions evolve. Isn’t it nice to show some appreciate for what mothers do?

@NorthernLurker are you a mother in law?

It's bittersweet or just miserable for so many people though.

If your mother has died, or if (like a family member of mine in the last year) your DC has died then you tend to have a very different take on things. And many threads can all too easily look like complaints that the diamond shoes are too tight.

Do you know what's tedious. People starting threads that tell people what they can and can't post.
Don't read it if you don't like it.

This is going to be my last Mother's Day as I have terminal cancer so I'll be making a big deal of it with my son and my mam, but I understand people who have awful mothers and women who have lost their children or can't have children hating Mother's Day

My wonderful mum died in August so this is this the 1st Mother's Day without her. It's so painful to watch all these adverts and here these people moaning about Mundane things. I also have a dear friend who's child is very ill and makes you realise these things do not matter in the slightest.
Hugs from my kids are all i need and grateful that my boys are in my life

@purpleunicorns

Aww so sorry purpleunicorn it must be such a difficult time for you. Hope you have the day you deserve

The frothing on here is hilarious

I am presuming from relatively new posters.

I know the threads @NorthernLurker is talking about, it is not because she is a pushed out MIL I'm pretty sure of that but when you have been here for many years you see the repetitive MD threads repeated every year and they ARE tedious.

They have started already and by Sunday active convos will be full of people moaning.

@purpleunicorns

It does some people expect a bit much to me. I am happy with a lie in, slice of toast and tea in bed. DH has bought me a card and gift. I already bought my own mum a gift which she got weeks ago as she asked for it. She will get a card and come up on mother’s Day for lunch and M&S cake st my house. Dh plans to watch football during that time suits me fine.