Am I being too tight?

[bearsBEARS]

hallo, name change for this but long time reader first time poste.r
My DP brought up an issue the other day an ive been thinking about it.
He got his dream job on Friday after months and months of worrying and i bought him a small gift of a plant that cost £3.
He brought up then that I didn't get him material gifts enough. He said in the time we've been together I've surprised him with two things - a bag of coffee. He buys me things every week and sends tiny presents, pays for cinema tickets and buys meals. He is on the same wage as me but i want to save all my money where he is happy to treat.
Is this unreasonable? Should I try harder/

But you didn’t do it from his point of view because you’re not him.

Forget the gifts - he shouldn’t be forced to spend money just because you want to.

Come back to the socialising - how has it come about that it’s always you paying for the cinema and nights out?

Just stick to what you see happening, don’t fuck around with fairy stories.

It’s like feminism never happened.
Start pulling your weight. Embarrassed for you.

Ofgs what is the point of a reverse?
Just state the problem.

I was initially going to say that some people express their love through gifts, others through other means (physically, doing things, verbally).
It may be hard when partners express love in different ways and they end up feeling unloved, particularly if they don't recognise how the other expresses love.
So, you/him not giving gifts could be nothing. Whereas you/him giving lots of gifts or expensive gifts, it's up to you/him and your/his problem.

The main problem, IMO, is when one doesn't contribute fairly to joint expenses (and He's a lesser spotted cocklodger in training. ), or when one doesn't express love in ANY meaningful way.

Then, there's the spenders/savers divide. Yes, it's complicated when one saves more and the other spends more. So, it depends on what they agree on and who instigates the spending.

In summary, YAB a little bit U to demand presents back, but YANBU to expect to share joint expenses fairly.

we dont buy gifts maybe couple of things at the start but the going out and not paying in turns?

nah dump him

Yes you are right. Have you thought that the reason you have money to save is because he pays for everything you do together! I could never be with someone like you.

FFS ITS A REVERSE!!!
READ THE FUCKING THREAD