To think if a child accidently pours Ribena over Coco Pops instead of milk, you don't make them eat it?

[AliceAbsolum]

Me, aged 8. That memory is causing a disproportionate amount of distress. It was a lot of Ribena and I felt so sick 🙁 Or maybe I'm being a wuss and it was a proportionate punishment?

Horrible being forced to eat anything.

No, not proportionate response.

If it was an accident (picked up the wrong bottle / accifdentally tipped a glass of Ribena into the bowl) there should have been no punishment.

If it was deliberately messing about I would have said ‘Ok you have used your share of Ribena wastefully, so no more this week, and here’s a slice of bread for breakfast’.

Anyway, the main point is, you are struggling with memories from your childhood

Undoubtedly abusive and utterly unacceptable.

If I made a mistake and poured Ribena over my cereal nevertheless in a million years would I think I had to eat it. What is the purpose of forcing a child to eat such a disgusting thing because of a mistake? Just awful. I am sorry this was done to you

Context?

A one off genuine mistake, or a parent fed up to tell a child not to do something and being ignored all the time?

I wouldn't have done it, but in the 2nd case I might make my child have a mouthful to stress the reason why I told him to pay attention for the 45th time that morning instead of reading a book at the table, or play with something.

Perhaps the dm was worried about money.

So much more information is needed.
Were you messing about before hand and this was part of the silly behaviour.
Was money tight so if the coco pops were thrown away then someone else missed out on some other food.

The thing is, even if it wasn't an accident and the OP had been playing silly beggars, it still doesn't warrant that kind of consequence. As HotpotLawyer suggests there are alternative consequences.

The whole "I was forced to eat... and I'm fine" doesn't lessen the fact that OP found it traumatic, and if anyone on this thread was forced to eat anything against their will then they'd be entitled to be upset, too.

Just because something was acceptable in your home when you were a child doesn't make it right.

Neat Ribena (well fake, supermarket own brand) kept next to the milk in the fridge, one off mistake.
They did hate waste but really? 50ps worth of squash? Just don't understand why you would force your child to suffer so much for a genuine mistake. I constantly walked on egg shells around her so I was very careful most of the time.

Thank you everyone who has posted.

Sounds like my grandmother with my mum. Granted she was batty and it was during the war.

I certainly wouldn't, no. But I think times are different now - my mum probably would have with me!

I kind of get the context as in forced, as a child me and Dsis were forced to eat all our food even if it was horrible and not allowed to leave the table until it was all gone. Dsis used to be left in her high chair for hours, asleep on the tray in the food and I also used to fall asleep at the table. My mum was a crap cook with cheap food and I remember being made to eat some kind of beef/liver type dinner that meat was so tough I was gagging chewing it over and over. At about 7 I started refusing to eat meat because of this incident and declared myself vegetarian!

Context counts but anything forced is abusive

I judge parents who give Ribena to their kids anyway

And a waste of cocopops too though

how is your relationship now?

It sounds like the mum was a bit... ‘combustible’ perhaps and this was one incident of harsh or scary treatment. It’s horrible when you try not to breathe too hard just to try to be so quiet and hope no one will notice you are there.

My mum used to do stuff like this. She was a violently abusive alcoholic so I would say that makes this behaviour abnormal. Hope you've grown into a wonderful adult without her help, OP x

That is abusive.

It was a child’s mistake.
Neat ribeana tastes terrible.

If a woman came on here saying her husband forced her to do this people would be advising her to leave.

It sounds like you had a very anxious child hood so it would benefit you to speak to a professional if it’s still upsetting you now

Now I’ve got a young child I do understand tho why my mum seemed stressed a lot of the time. However being constantly on egg shells isn’t normal

Actually more like 10p worth of squash.

I’m sorry this happened to you. You were not to blame. You needn’t be ashamed.

I bet she had stresses going on in her life that you as an 8 year old knew nothing about.
did she carry on with that behaviour op

No I wouldn't. Although I poured some fresh orange over my cereal a few weeks ago. I added milk and ate it. It was weird but didn't do me any harm. Concentrate juice is a little different though.

As a parent I would've been annoyed as it is obviously careless but there is no way I would have let them eat it, too much sugar. I might have put the coco pops away for a while and brought out the weetabix and I might not have brought coco pops for a while (never buy it for my family anyway as too sweet) I dislike waste and my ds is careless also and does careful as things like pouring too much and wasting. So I resort to limiting his favourites.

Ugh, Mumsnetters give me the creeps sometimes. OP - if this is a real incident, then no, it certainly wasn't ok. Even if the kid was messing around, then making them eat something disgusting isn't an appropriate consequence. And how come a child being messy is responsible for their actions, but a mother acting disproportionately and abusively always gets the "poor baby, it's so stressful being a mum, it's not her fault she snapped" treatment?

The cost of the Ribena should be irrelevant. I would never do that to my child, it's disgusting and cruel and I'm not surprised it's stayed with you

Do you speak to your mum now? Ever mention the incident? I’d try to make it into more of a ‘how stupid were you to make me gag on Rubens and coco pops’.

I often got the blame for things my sister did. Lots of things come to mind (she did daft things and I got blamed because I was younger). I gave up trying to explain (‘but mum I was away on a residential school trip when that happened - exactly how could I have tried to shampoo and brush the teeth of the cat?’).

Why on earth is this important now in the context of your adult life!?!?