Aibu about this money?

[Tearsandfears]

Im going on a short break with friends later this year. I arranged it with their agreement, and booked and paid the deposit.

That was 2 months ago. I sent all the info through and asked them to reimburse me but I've had no offers of payment since then. I sent an email this week as a reminder, heard nothing so then text them to advise of email. Get reply from friend 1 saying she will give me cash when she sees me (this might not be until the holiday) because she cant do a bank transfer or get the mpney to me any other way! Nothing from other friend yet.

I am currently £400 out of pocket. I'm not going to starve but it is pretty annoying- aibu to feel like that?

They'll need to do bank transfers for other things eventually, they need to get savvy with online banking and pay you, it's so rude and lazy.

Friend 1 might be able to put cash in your account at the Post Office and some of them open outside office hours now.

Unless either of them are bankrupt, there really is no excuse and if they can afford a holiday, have passports, jobs that earn them money and make it hard for them to get to the bank, it sounds like they are making life difficult for themselves and you by refusing to engage in the modern world.

If they can afford the holiday, they should be able to afford a cheap smart phone and sim only contract that gives them internet access then they can use paypal, internet banking and all manner of other payment methods. And they're so useful, which is why almost everyone under about 50 has them.

You can get phone contracts with loads of texts and calls, and a reasonable amount of data for a fiver a month FFS, and pay a few quid more and you can get one with a basic smartphone. If they can't afford that, then they can't afford the holiday by the sounds of it.

I hope they pay you back. Stick to your guns.

It’s definitely won’t, rather than can’t. They need to move with the times.

Lots of bank branches are open Saturday mornings and the post office can do some banking transactions. Or they could simply telephone their bank at lunch time, or maybe take half an hour off work to pop to the bank.

I would re-assess arranging anything in future for either of these friends.

Definitely agree with others that it is a case of can't be bothered.

Whatever their reasons for not having any sort of basic bank accounts - and I'm guessing it's can't be bothered rather than not allowed to - this makes it their problem to get the money to you and not yours.

Did they not think of how they would actually pay when they agreed to the holiday?

I live in the English Midlands - it would be like me choosing to buy a washing machine from an eBay seller in Kirkwall that's (unsurprisingly) clearly marked as 'collection only' and then being amazed to realise that it's going to be a very expensive, time-consuming task to fetch it - and then considering it the Orcadian seller's duty to get it to me.

How on earth do these people cope in the real world?
As pps have said, if they're stuck in the 1980s, presumably they still have cheque books.
They're talking you for a mug op.

We've had similar discussions on threads about non-drivers. Whilst there are many who happily walk, cycle, use public transport or taxis and very occasionally ask for a lift, for which they offer and insist on paying petrol money, there are also others who are of the opinion that 'I don't have a car and you do, so it's therefore your responsibility to give me free lifts all the time, every time I demand ask for them'. As if it's an arbitrary thing to magically have a car rather than something very expensive that you actively plan and carefully budget for.

They are going to mug you off. You are going to let them. They are full of shit. My SIL had to get a basic account after a bankruptcy and she was on benefits (left a DV relationship). No cheques, no overdraft. But she had a card to use so they're telling you porkies.

Funny they had money to get passports! Those are about 80 quid now.

Next time won't pay anything until they have paid you, get the money up front. Only those who had paid you would then get a place. It's rude of them yes but you chose to pay the money and take the risk. May be they're not such good friends as you thought, or can't afford it and don't want to say. Hope you get your money back

I haven't read entire thread so may be repeating. You can't walk into a high street bank and pay money Into someone else account now.. or use the machines that used to do it. the law changed last year due to money laundering. They ask security questions if you try to say it's your own account. You can Transfer it through your own bank though it think.

I am sorry for you, and your friends are CFs. But I would never ever ever pay upfront for ANYTHING for other people.

I get/have got this quite often (and DH too.) He works at a place where he can get 30% off a certain thing (let's say, tickets for concerts/shows.) So 2 X £45 tickets (£90) would cost him £60, with his staff discount. So a decent discount.

At least once a month, he gets someone asking him to get 4 tickets for him for a certain show, (which he gets for example, for £120 instead of £180,) and they say 'get them for us and we'll give you the money back next payday/in 2 weeks.'

When people say this, you're chasing them for the bloody money for weeks, and you end up feeling bad for asking for your own money. DH (and me,) have had times where the people who owe us the money, start getting annoyed with us, and say ' I WILL give it you, I just don't have it this week like I thought I would,' with a kind of look!

Needless to say, we have stopped doing it now, and refuse to get ANYthing unless they pay the money up front.

I agree with the posters saying you should tell them you are cancelling if they don't pay within 48 hours!

Why did the pay the balance ?
That was the perfect opportunity to get them to pay by x date or it would be cancelled.

Sausage, if car written off you would cancel insurance.
Op your 'friends' are having a laugh.

Tbh if one friend isn't bothering to reply and the other one is planning to give you cash on the day of travel (and as a pp pointed out, probably then claim they have no money for spending money), I wouldn't even give them a deadline, I'd just transfer the holiday to your DH & DC now, today, and send a message to that effect, holiday cancelled for them. They're taking the piss and have been for a while (and/or time-travelled here from pre-decimalisation).

The could deposit the money the old fashion way at the bank or send you a check. It sounds like they don't want to pay yet.

Do they know you have also paid the balance?

If not I would be telling them you need the funds to pay the balance as you do not have it and if they don't send it you will have to cancel but will obviously stil require their deposits from them.

Then change the booking and go with DH and never arrange anything for them again.

Do you know, I really wouldn’t be going on holiday with them, particularly not friend 1. It doesn’t sound as though it’s going to be a particularly joyful holiday with someone who is so hard up. You’ll find yourself subbing her for the entire time if you aren’t careful. I’d bin them both off and pay to transfer the other two spaces to your DP and DC if I were you.

It might not be so easy to transfer or cancel the booking. If flights are involved, it usually costs more to transfer to another name than it would to buy another ticket.

And unless cancelling very early, you usually lose most or all your money. The OP might even have been required to pay some of the remaining balance even if she had cancelled when the full balance was due - I've seen people on here complaining that they still had to pay money even if cancelling a trip before the final balance is due - the cancellation terms are usually set out in the several pages of T&Cs that no-one, and I include myself in that, ever reads.

They dont intend to pay at all.

They wont have money to spend on the holiday.

You will have a miserable time.

In future, price something up, tell people the cost and ask them for the money. When you have it, you will book.

Even if the holiday can't be cancelled or transferred, I still wouldn't go. OP has lost the money anyway, why lose more when Flakey McIncapable can't shell out for transport to the airport and Rudey McDoesnt-Textback forgets her wallet?

Two women in their 40s can't walk into a bank and pay £into your account ? How do they think things will be on holiday? Hardly a nice atmosphere. Nobody can be this useless.

You give your friends your sort code and account number and they can pop into a branch near them off your bank and pay it in.

One thing would have been you suggesting the holiday and inviting them, quite another thing is that one of them suggested it, they said they would pay and now they are taking the piss.

@BurritoFan

"Why lose more when Flakey McIncapable can't shell out for transport to the airport and Rudey McDoesnt-Textback forgets her wallet?"

LOL at that!

Seriously though 'burritofan' is right OP! Fuck 'em. They are terrible friends!