Urgent advice re phones abroad needed. Suspicions re DH

[Plastictattoo]

Hi
DH flew to European city today with work. Not too unusual to happen but some things have got me thinking.

1. He bought new trainers, coat and had hair cut yesterday.
2. He text me to say not to tag him on FB as some people at work were saying this trip was a jolly. (I rarely post on FB and probably tag him about 2/3 times a year for holiday photos so this seemed really odd request).
3. I missed a call from him so rang back from my mobile. His number is saved without the international dialling numbers in my phone and it rang as normal..ie not the abroad ring tone I was expecting. Does this mean that he isn't on mainland Europe?

I said I woukd call back. Is there a way of doing this that means I could establish where he is? Hope that makes sense. TIA

Just ask him to tell which hotel he is in ... if he won't, you have your answer

There's a thing called trip it which my husband uses when he goes away on business, which is most weeks. It sends me an email with all his travel details. I like it to remind me which country he's in and when he's coming home, and where I can get hold of him if I need to talk him and his mobile's switched off/battery died.
It seems to me that since mobile phone charges became the same whether you are calling in Britain or in Europe, that the ringtone has been the same, as well, but I might be imagining that! I've noticed fewer and fewer of the "different" country ring tones these past few years, anyway.

OP - can you track him on find my iPhone? Otherwise I'd be tempted to tag him on Facebook to see what happens.

Putting it all together it sounds dodgy.

Sorry.

Ask him for his flight details - then tell him you are meeting him off the flight. I would probably camp out at arrivals to be honest...

You would 100% have an international/weird dial tone when you called him if he was abroad. I would be suspicious as well.

Meant to say

If he comes back with 0 photos of this European trip then you've got a pretty big give away too. My DP travels for work all the time he's always snapping a few pics of the city and sights.

When is he due back OP? As a PP said if its after the weekend that would be strange for a work trip. I hope he is genuinely abroad with work though. One thing to remember sometimes the reason people become suspicious isn't connected to the thing they are suspicious of, it could be you have doubts about DH but this trip is genuine, whatever happens I hope you are OK, its horrible being unable to ask someone outright.

How’s he getting back from the airport? Did he take his car?

Erick I rarely take photos when away with work. I go to the same place quite regularly, so no need. Absence of photos is not a smoking gun.

On the other hand, if OP asked for a selfie in the city and he couldn't provide one, it would be highly suspicious.

Red flags all over this one I’m afraid

Bananasarenottheonlyfruit I didn't say it was set in stone, but for ME it would be a red flag with my relationship. Both DP and I travel frequently to Europe and the US.

The finance tracking is a good idea, check to see if he has used his debit card and where its been used, if its in a UK restaurant, hotel, shop etc then it will be a give away as the dates will be noted, if he has taken out currency then that will be evident too...however if there is no spending at all it could be indicative of a company card so a genuine work trip.

He has sent photos of the place he is as I asked then called to check I had them. Not selfies but then he doesn't do selfies anyway.
Asked for flight details for him coming home tomorrow. He said he wasn't sure as he may be getting an earlier flight now.

Just a note on the dial tone, my partner was in Norway and I called this morning international dial tone, then he was in Amsterdam this afternoon, I called him and it was a usual uk ring so it isn't always correct. Sometimes when I call it's uk ring tone despite him being on mainland Europe.

He has a personal credit card he uses for work that I don't have access to the details of. It has always been like that. I've never asked for details as all our banking is online.

He is lying....I don't understand how your conversations go.

WHat time is your flight back?

I don't know? I might get an earlier flight.

Oh OK, so what was the original one and what time might you come back now?

That's good OP, I am pleased that he has put your mind at rest by sending photos, try and relax now. I would have been suspicious before but as he has sent photos I think its genuine.

He’s not sure what time his flight is? Now he maybe coming home early? Hmm.

How’s your relationship been otherwise, have you had any other concerns lately?

just one thing though, could these photos have been taken off the internet, you can check that via google images, just realised hes not in any of them from what you say.

FaceTime him?

But he sounds very sus, unless he's usually this flighty. I'd call him. There's no reason he can't FaceTime in a hotel abroad.

If he's sent photos but not selfies, they could be anyone's photos of the place he's taken from Google or Instagram. I'd be suspicious.

He has sent photos of the place he is as I asked then called to check I had them. Not selfies but then he doesn't do selfies anyway.
Asked for flight details for him coming home tomorrow. He said he wasn't sure as he may be getting an earlier flight now.

Do reverse images google search. Even if he thought he was getting an earlier flight, surely he could tell you what was currently booked? Would his work pay for a new flight for no reason? Sounds weird.

can the kids facetime him to say goodnight, surely you can look at his fb page to see if he has posted anything.

what time is the DC bedtime, you could say they want to say goodnight to him via facetime, if he is playing away at the very least that would give him guilt pangs thinking about his children.