Urgent advice re phones abroad needed. Suspicions re DH

[Plastictattoo]

Hi
DH flew to European city today with work. Not too unusual to happen but some things have got me thinking.

1. He bought new trainers, coat and had hair cut yesterday.
2. He text me to say not to tag him on FB as some people at work were saying this trip was a jolly. (I rarely post on FB and probably tag him about 2/3 times a year for holiday photos so this seemed really odd request).
3. I missed a call from him so rang back from my mobile. His number is saved without the international dialling numbers in my phone and it rang as normal..ie not the abroad ring tone I was expecting. Does this mean that he isn't on mainland Europe?

I said I woukd call back. Is there a way of doing this that means I could establish where he is?
Hope that makes sense.
TIA

[RippleEffects]

Do you have a joint bank or his banking details? I'd check accounts to see what's been spent and where.

Most people Feb paper or coffee at the airport, many hotels take a sort of deposit on your card etc etc.

[theothermum]

Nobody at my company would give out any details of the flights or hotels - that's a breach of Data Privacy policy. They would contact me to tell me I need to call back.
Tagging in FB posts is not weird, I hate being tagged and would not want my colleagues to think I took my partner on a work trip if we were tagged in a post together.
All of the above being said, my travel details are always in a shared calendar at which my partner never looks.

[IncrediblySadToo]

I find it shocking that anyone would neglect to tell their spouse/partner where they are traveling to, flight information, and the hotel they're staying in. That's simply unacceptable and a massive red flag

Unacceptable to YOU - you would have noticed, if you’d read the thread, that others feel differently.

...weird that isn’t it, that other people do things differently! 🙄

[theothermum]

@RippleEffects I have a company card which I use for business travel (literally for everything) as it is linked to our expense reporting system. Nothing would show on my personal bank account and no one but me has access to my company card account.

[GreatDuckCookery6211]

A red flag to what? DH is away more or less every month. I will sometimes ask him what his hotel is like if I know it’s a nice one but other than that I don’t ask much.

[TSSDNCOP]

I’d think it was more suspicious if DH suddenly started detailing his movements.

His super efficient PA knows precisely where he is at all times and would be able to recach him at a client, hotel or restaurant if needs be.

No flags. Not even a tiny little one.

[FelicisWolf]

I have a client that I ring regularly on his mobile. Mon-weds he is in the UK, and thurs-fri he is in Europe. The dial tone changes depending on if he is in the UK or not. Normal ring-ring in the UK, and beeeep-pause-beeeep if he's in Europe

[Corna]

Can you Skype with him or ask for a pic of where he is?

[Chloemol]

If you phone a uk mobile ( starts 07 I think) from another uk mobile it just rings as normal wherever you are in the world

[Atalune]

We have a shared family calendar where he puts everything on- I otoh don’t!

Have you heard from him op?

[FelicisWolf]

Bit sketchy doing this, but does he have an iPhone and do you know his Apple ID/password? If you use the 'Find my iPhone' app that's on all iPhones and enter in his Apple ID and password, you can then see his exact location

[NerrSnerr]

I don't know hotel details of when my husband works away. I know when he's boarding his flights as he texts me so I could find flight numbers if I need to.

If there was an emergency and I somehow couldn't contact him on his mobile I'd call his workplace and get the details (they have 24 hour staff). This hasn't happened in 10 years.

He does FaceTime us daily and sends photos of the city he says he's in so I don't think he's in a travelodge in Coventry instead of where he says he is.

[Plastictattoo]

Sorry been doing dinner. Thanks for the replies.
I know which city he is. Its not odd (for us) to not have hotel/ flight details.
I've spoke to him. I asked what time it was there and it took him a while to work it out as he was 'confused'.
No way would I phone his work and ask for details when there are so many other ways to get in touch with him.
I don't have iPhone but he and my eldest do.

[Jenasaurus]

I suspect he has told his work that he is away with you and would be caught out if you tag him or make a comment.

[ataleoftwothenthreethenfour]

Tell us which city he's in and I'm sure one of us will know it well enough to find you a really specific question to ask him that he would have trouble answering if he wasn't there.

[FelicisWolf]

Apple ID is an email address, you could try that with a password he usually uses and see if it works? not that I'm endorsing this kind of behaviour of course

[sweeneytoddsrazor]

And what do you think regarding the confusion over the time?

[AnyWalls]

So he can't tell the time? Yes, he's shagging another one. 100%.

[Motoko]

Look, I've no idea whether the ring tone changes or not, but stating unequivocally, that it either does, or does not, is not helping the OP. As pps have said they experience both, we should assume it depends on the network, so it might be more helpful to tell OP what network you're using when you say if you get a different tone, or not.

[caughtinanet]

How many hours time difference is it with the place he's meant to be? Would jet lag be a factor in him being "confused"

[Babysharkdododont]

Get someone else to phone work for him urgently, (whatever an emergency is in his line of work). They'll either say he's on leave or he's at a conference, you'll have your answer then

[Jam82]

Can you ask him to get you something from the airport duty free that will have the duty free stickers on, like alcohol or cigarettes? Or something else that you knows that you like from the city he’s in? Ask him what time his flight gets back and offer to pick him up from airport?

[Nautiloid]

I may be wrong but I thought it was the roaming network that caused the different ring tone. Every time I ring a UK mobile in Europe I get it. Last time was today. BUT I always call from work landline.
No international code needed even from a landline though.