Man doing my pedicure

[eyesbiggerthanstomach]

I'm having a rubbish day so maybe am being super sensitive but not sure. There is a nail bar I regularly go to. A few men work there but it's mainly women. Usually one of the women does my pedicure. I have had one or two of the men do it in the past too.

Anyway, am currently getting one done by a man and I'm feeling really uncomfortable. I can't explain why. Maybe because he is slow and so every touch feels like it's lasting ages but I'm not enjoying it.

Is it unreasonable to specify a woman does it in future?

So you can't choose who you want to touch you touch you for risk of offending someone else.

Ffs.

Man or women. You have the right to choose you touches you. Male or female. Like the look of them or not. It's your body. Neverland of you offend someone.
Just be polite about it ffs.

What's wrong with that?

teyem I’m loving your contributions!

So Dietrios revolting comment stays but the angry response to it gets deleted. Lovely.

If you operate a good salon, everyone should feel comfortable asking for whatever they want.

If my waxer was off, I'd expect to be asked if I'd want a different waxer. Male or female.
I'd expect to be made comfortable if I said yes or no.

It's personal preference ffs. Feet or fanny. It's up to me who sees it and interacts with it. Nothing wrong with that.

It's not sexist.

A man did my boob job. Because I felt like I could trust him.

You are perfectly entitled to not want a man, or anyone I suppose, not touching your feet if you’re not comfortable with them, for whatever reason. Any human, man or woman, willing to touch my hideous trotters however, would be due a medal. 🥇

......anyone? It’s like the devil’s hooves down here........

Thanks Jessica, although it's the very first time I've ever had a post deleted. A lot of hurt feelings around tonight.

I get my nails done by a man. Doesn't speak a word of English, but they are the best they've ever been done in twenty years of having acrylic nails. There is also a man that does amazing pedicures, but I wouldn't let him touch my finger nails.

That said, they always ask if I mind if one of the guys does it whenever I walk in. They don't get offended if someone says no.

BUT the "male" comment is totally unacceptable and would not be tolerated in reverse.
But it wouldn’t be the same in reverse would it? What percentage of men experience high levels of unwanted touch, attention or scrutiny from women? It’s not a level playing field, a reversal makes a different situation.

Can I ask OP, are the workers in the nail bar from SA? if so they may have been trafficked. Please don't support it.

Not unreasonable to want a female to touch a part of your body instead of a male if it makes you more comfortable.

It's not sexist in the slightest. Body autonomy and being comfortable is most important here.

I would personally not mind a male pedicurist. I had a male gynacologist during my pregnancy, male surgeon and male registrar during labour and giving birth. However i did request a female to help clean me up around 8 hours post birth. I just felt uncomfortable having a man clean me up. I cant explain why. But that's how i felt.

Sorry i meant female nurse instead of the male nurse.

I don’t think I would care, it’s someone doing a job. Not fussed who as long as the end result is good.

teyem so someone reported your post? Whatever for?! Mind you, I responded to an accusation levelled at me on a thread last week that I was there to ‘fight’ ( as a child abuse victim on a thread about abuse ), with ‘ that’s b*shit’, and it was deleted. I asked why as it wasn’t a personal attack and swearing isn’t banned. It was because both sides were getting heated and they wanted to get it back on track... that doesn’t seem very fair does it? So it’s a bit hit and miss with all these rules!

Ask for your preferred therapist by name- you can book in with who you like.i

Not unreasonable to ask for your favourite technician.

Excluding an entire gender is weird, but it's your body. A man could ask not to have a female hairdresser touching him.

The story about peeling a potato is the disturbing part. What kind of body treatment place has food in it? Feet and potatoes?!? What kind of cheap illegal dump is that place!

My response to diet got deleted but his/hers didn’t???

In what way is it sexist? Yes everyone needs employment but everyone has a right to feel comfortable and safe.
Personally I would feel fine having a man doing my nails (have male gp, male midwife and work in a male dominated team) but what if I didn’t? Don’t I have a right to say no?

Excluding an entire gender is weird, but it's your body the but isn’t necessary. Let’s rephrase it:
It’s your body and you can exclude anyone for any reason and that includes all males if that’s your preference.

When I get my nails done I am not too fussy but I don't like the way one woman does it (they peel off after 5 mins) and I don't like her way / mannerisms. So I specify who I would like. It's fine. It's ok to prefer the service of someone else. You didn't enjoy your treatment this time so next time ask for one of the other beauticians or someone other than this person.

Fine you didn’t want a man - probably best if you expressed your preference at the start rather than passively accepting it.

the but isn’t necessary

it is when men wouldn't be able to refuse a woman because she is a woman!

And if it was a medical professional, such as an A&E doctor, or a fireman, you wouldn't be given the choice! For a (very weird) pedicure, you can ask for anyone.

Be mindful that some people refuse to be touched by a person from a different race. So yes, it's your body, but the beauty place have a right to tell you to jog on, it's not their problem if you don't like a man or a black person doing the job.

it is when men wouldn't be able to refuse a woman because she is a woman!

Except they can.
You can specify for a female or male doctor in A & E, depending on the emergency. Using the few examples of an emergency where your life relies on immediate care, is missing the point.

Bringing up race, and comparing it to this, is BS. Those people are racists. Skin colour and sex are completely different issues and it’s unbelievable to raise that in this context. My word.

Of course skin colours and sex are no different issues at all, ever heard of protected characteristics?

You can only discriminate against a protected characteristic under very specific conditions - I doubt having a pedicure would qualify.

I get my nails done regularly, I care they are done well and look nice, not bothered by who does them. They know what they are doing so no issue.