Ridiculous argument with DH who is BU?

[NurseryWoes123]

This may be the epitomy of ridiculous...

I sleep with my feet sticking out of the quilt. DH thinks this is ridiculous. It doesn’t effect him at all. They go out the side and mind their own business.

Jokingly he suggested that if someone were to come into the bedroom at night they would drag me out the bed by my feet

I suggested that surely if they wanted to drag me out the bed by my feet they could just slip their hands under the quilt anyway - so no difference?

Anyway last night around 2am DH decided to prove his point and drag me by the feet out the bed. He was laughing. I was not. I’m 27 weeks pregnant and I need my sleep!

I hit the roof, he said it was a joke and I said it was a mean thing to do, especially as I hadn’t slept well the night before. He said I would normally find it funny (maybe) and that he didn’t understand the difference between now and before I was pregnant.

I sent him to the spare room.

So who was being a twat unreasonable?

Can't see anything funny about dragging an unsuspecting pregnant woman by her feet. He sounds like a moron.

Nothing is funny at 2am when you were asleep. Nothing. Let alone being scared by being pulled along the bed. Pregnant or not.

He seems obsessed with the way you sleep. It’s very common to sleep with your feet or a leg out of the bed. It’s hardly like sleeping hanging from the chandelier or something. FFS. I’d find his obsession with it really weird.

I hope he grows the fuck up before the baby arrives.

Why should you calmly explain why it's unreasonable???

He should calmly apologise.

I was semi-dozing. So I had stirred when he popped to the loo but not fully woken IYSWIM.

Too be honest, I do think I have over reacted. He has apologised lots this morning and I can see how he thought I would laugh normally.

I don’t see how he’s obssesssd with how I sleep it’s just been one of those daft conversations couples have and tease each other about?

I might let him do the first three days of nappies as punishment.

Thanks for all advice, and rest assured DH is neither abusive or aggressive. He just had a twat moment, we’re all guilty of it

Does anyone else see this as really quite fucking sinister?

Yes! It’s very very fucking weird to care where someone else’s feet are in bed!

OP is he normal physically clumsy/careless/rough with your body? Like does he tickle you too hard? Does he bump past you when he could wait for you to move?

He’s been a monumental shit to you and I really hope he knows he has some serious coddling and fluffing up to do to make it up to you. I’d be banishing him to the spare room for the forseeable to be honest, at least until you get a few decent nights sleep under your belt.

Please tell me he didn’t completely drag you out of bed by your feet so you fell to the floor!!!

Tonight when he is asleep, splash him in the face with a cold glass of water. See how he likes a big shock when he is soundo.

Stupid twat!! Could have given you a heart attack.

Does he bump past you when he could wait for you to move?

FFS, some posters really have issues. How do you go from a stupid joke to a woman on the verge of being bitten up. Seriously, you need some help.

Start of story, you like to sleep with your feet out of the covers.

End of story.

It’s like an episode of Inside Number 9. You need revenge. Sedate him before bedtime and at 2am tie him up and put him in a cupboard. Hilarious. Or at least it might make him grow up and think about what’s actually funny.

Disclaimer. Toy with my sleep at your peril 😄

He has apologised lots this morning

Good.
Accept it and insist he never does anything like that again. That should be it, hopefully.

There’s people on YouTube who male a living out of pranking each other- if that’s how you two ‘work’ then forgive him and move on.

But Jesus wept... If my husband had done that to me...

I'm currently 30 weeks and if mine did that to me I'd be fuming!! I can take a joke & we often do silly things but I'd draw the line at that.

Paybacks a bitch

He would be in the spare room for the entire rest of my pregnancy. As a pp said, is he always this stupid?

Had he come into the room while you were awake and tickled your feet to make his point (which he doesn't need to make, it doesn't affect him and anyway, being pregnant can make you feel like a radiator!), fine. In the middle of the night while you're sleeping? I WOULD EAT HIM.

Too be honest, I do think I have over reacted

No you haven't. Compared to many of us here you have reacted pretty mildly.

You need to make it clear that this type of manhandling is not to be repeated. That is, if he did actually drag you down the bed whilst holding on firmly to your ankles - and not just a gentle playful tug that didn't shift the position of your body. Still annoying mind you.

It was stupid but as your dh said it's something you would usually find funny I think you are the kind of couple who lark about like that and have daft disagreements.
All it takes is to have a serious word with him that being pregnant changes having these daft pranks.
There's always OTT reactions from some posters about stuff like this. I sometimes wonder how most of them manage to have a relationship, they are so paranoid about every interaction with men.

WTF

You didn't overreact though, at all.

So it's good that he's had a shock.

The balance has shifted - if he's a good man, he should be aware of that. Surprised that he's clearly not - ok, yep, everyone has a twat moment... but, my DH would never in a million years have even considered making some physical joke like that while I was pregnant, and asleep, and potentially given me a fright. Never.

It should be automatic, that sense of taking care and being protective.

He's hada wake up call? Good. Very good.

I would have yelled a few obscenities and then laughed. Although I think it's far more amusing that you posted on here and thought that anybody might say anything other than hes an abusive twat.

He was BU. What a knob.

I wouldn't find it funny. I really really like my sleep and I'm not pretty when woken.

Finding it funny in the abstract is one thing. I am an entirely different (and incredibly angry and violent) person when I've just been woken up.

But then I'd assume that this particular sort of prank was only the sort of thing students did.

Wait until he's exhausted with sleep deprivation once the baby comes and is just dozing off and then clang something noisy beside his head

It was stupid of him, and I can see why you were furious but I really don't think the people insinuating abuse even understand what they're on about.

FFS, some posters really have issues. How do you go from a stupid joke to a woman on the verge of being bitten up. Seriously, you need some help

Not beaten up. being bumped past. Some people are physically bolshy without actually meaning to be. They are careless when moving past others, they can hurt people without realising or intending to. They don’t observe physical space boundaries. This is what I am asking OP. I’m not asking if he beats her up.

To be honest if he doesn’t get that things are a wee bit different now that you are pregnant you’ll definitely get your ‘own back’ when baby comes. No need for you to actually do anything to prank him, baby will have your back with that.

Still demand the foot rubs / bubble bath to relax / meal cooked as you are tired.... you know just because you can and they will be in short supply I’m guessing in the Footpullerkidnappers lair so you deserve a last (insert preferred treat) before you are whisked off.