Is it offensive or am I being silly?

[CocaColaaa]

Just a quick one but NC for this as I guess its outing.

My childrens school are doing world book day and the “theme” is peter pan, its given some suggestions of characters you can dress up as and one is tigerlilly. I was thinking of chosing that one for DD as I hate all of the tinkerbell dresses but ive heard its offensive to dress up as certain things. Native americans being on of them. Is it offensive or am I being silly? Why oh why do they have to do themes and not just let people pick their favourite book characters 😩

In my years as a primary teacher I've never seen a child dressed as Tiger Lily or had it proposed as a choice.

Plenty of Paddys in my extended family. My grandmother, great grandmother and at least two aunts were called Biddy. So what, are you censoring names, now?

“So what, are you censoring names, now?”

No, I was just giving a real life example of how cultural insensitivity can be hurtful.

So what, are you censoring names, now?

Exactly the response is expect.

It's not about censorship, but being considerate of other people's feelings / sensibilities / preferences, which are expressed for good reason.

DH has Paddys on his side of the family, but some Irish people will not want to be called it.

And nobody is censoring anything. Some posters have made a bizarre leap from not thinking dressing up as Tiger Lily is a good idea to burning books...but nobody on the “snowflake” side has suggested censorship!

I think you'll find that Paddy as a name is not a flash-point for racism nowadays.

Proof positive that you are commenting without reading.

In my opinion, your evidence simply doesn’t point where you say it does. The thread is about a little girl, in England, for a school event, dressing as Tiger Lily and I am considering that example alone. Nothing that any poster has offered as evidence convinces me that Native Americans would be particularly excercised by that.

Absolutely, I must have hallucinated the comments re some Irish being reluctant to use it.

Have there been enough posts here that enough people would think a Native American costume could be uncongenial ( understatement ) to some. Whether you agree with it or not . In which case, best plan ( I would think ) is don't do it. Think of another one. I am sure it would not take more than a day and half and 500 egg boxes and some green paint to make a crocodile outfit.

Never had a school dressing up day where the theme was given - always a choice. DS's once was book character - he went as a thunderbirds pilot. Lovely MIL made him an outfit ( wasn't a book but she just said - you are dressed up I am sure I can find a Thunderbirds book if we need to cover our backs) .

So what, are you censoring names, now?

You really don’t strike me as someone looking for a nuanced discussion.

But it sends a message to children that dressing up as racial stereotypes is OK.

Why is it so important to you that kids dress up as Tiger Lily?

No, I detest nuance in every way.

Native American peoples when questioned about Native American costumes. Please don't dress in such costumes. It is hurtful, disrespectful and offensive.

MN. They don't really mean that. Besides we're in England. Of course it's fine.

“Absolutely, I must have hallucinated the comments re some Irish being reluctant to use it.”

There are plenty of people still alive who were abused as “paddies” and remember the hurt vividly.

So, are we agreed on banning the name Paddy, just to be on the safe side?

@CarolinePooter "I think you'll find that Paddy as a name is not a flash-point for racism nowadays."

I would agree but my friend did not want to be known as Paddy - it was his choice and the nickname had a resonance for him he did not want. ( This was some 30 years ago , other reasons as well ) . And given Patrick which, I stand by, a really nice name , why can't you use two different syllables.

Anyway - someone has to come up with cheap and cheerful crocodile outfit to avoid contention.

So, are we agreed on banning the name Paddy, just to be on the safe side?

Do you know how to read?

People have said that one name brought up horrific memories for them, so someone else kindly decided not to put them through pain for no reason...because they have an iota of cultural sensitivity and basic human decency. How that is equivalent to banning the name altogether from anyone using it I do not understand.

I have worked with a few Paddy’s and DS was nicknamed Paddy by my Irish colleagues when I was pregnant (and worked for an Irish organisation with about 80% Irish staff in the UK office I was in). So no, Paddy isn’t a slur.

Of course that’s not the same as some area telling ‘oi Paddy’ or ‘oi jock’ on hearing an irish or Scottish accent.

I love the name, has very fond associations for me. It would (of course) be silly to generalise!

“So, are we agreed on banning the name Paddy, just to be on the safe side?“
That ol’ nuance doing well, I see. And the “putting words in people’s mouths. That’s doing well too.

@LordProfFekkoThePenguinPHD do not think for one moment I am saying it is a slur - just that my friend didn't want it and it had a resonance for him he did not like. ( but very much older and - his choice - more reasons that I shall write here ) Gordon Bennett - banning Paddy as a nickname - nonsense - it is rather lovely - but then the person's choice.
@Tacolover

You really do struggle with the finer-grained argument, don't you Caroline?

Yes it's not my strong point, but I'm watching and learning;-)