To despise my own child?

[Jambalaya76]

He is 6. Very well behaved at school. Impeccable in fact. But at home he is a monster. Demanding, rude, hurtful, violent, very needy, destructive and not nice to be around. We have tried to get help from the school and have used behaviour modifying techniques, using rewards and consequences to actions. But he is very trying and I find my patience is low with him. It's like he enjoys trouble and being shouted at.
I do love him, but can't stand him at the same time. I desperately need help because I want to make our relationship better and give him better childhood memories other than being shouted at. Any help
Please?

In the same boat and wishing you luck. Some very helpful advice on here.

My DD is sometimes like this. I have tried a few parenting books but the only one that has actually been helpful is '10 days to a less defiant child', which explains how these behaviours often arise from anxiety and gives some good strategies to deal with them. I don't despise my DD but I certainly despise myself when I overreact to her behaviour. The book was quite helpful with strategies for how not to hate yourself as a parent too.