To want a picture of my bio children

[Fairydustsprinkled]

Had a photoshoot of my bio children 3 months ago and I really want a canvas printing for my back wall, AIBU that my stepchild is not on this?

Doesn't anyone RTFT anymore? No canvases big or small are going in the wall. OP is considering the SD's feelings and decided to compromise. She actually took most of the comments on board. Why is she still being preached at?

The nature of a forum is for people to post.

If you think people should be regulated with what they post and when then maybe you could set your own forum up?

If OP has all the information she wants and doesn’t want to read the thread anymore then nobody is holding a gun to her head.

i understand where you are coming from OP but you have to see it from DSC point of view too. They might feel left out or unwanted.

Personally for me I would have individual photos of each child and a group photo of all the children, personally I would consider SC one of my children too, but not as in SC being my child but they are family.

@YourSarcasmIsDripping thank you I really appreciate this

@Blackbear10 I really don't agree here but thank you anyway

I've just seen your post about wanting the picture of your eldest kissing baby. Could you put that up, but then get a photo of dsd holding the new baby and put that up next to it? You still get the picture you want and together they'd just like you've got one of each older sibling with new baby. I think that would look quite sweet.

I think if all 3 kids have the same dad then it's pretty unfair to prominently display a big canvas of just 'your' 2 - from both your stepchild's & partner's points of view. A canvas in your bedroom would be fine (although may be not as the main focal point!) but not in the communal areas.

These threads (along with OW threads) always seem to attract those who have had failed relationships, projecting their own feelings onto someone else’s situation.

A canvas in your bedroom would be fine (although may be not as the main focal point!)

Are you seriously suggesting OP can’t have a picture of her own children in her own bedroom as a focal point.

Perhaps she should bury it in the garden, or better still put in on the bonfire.

“Are you seriously suggesting OP can’t have a picture of her own children in her own bedroom as a focal point.”

Well, unless the bedroom is one of these Mumsnet Sanctum Sanctorums where none but sexual partners are allowed then yes, I would seriously suggest that.

“If anything it means your DC sometimes having to come second which is really shit for them but what happens when you enter into a blended family“

Unless the reverse is also true and you can accept that sometimes the step child has to come second?

What a shitty attitude to have towards younger half siblings. Their worlds have to stop until the golden first born is present once again

If anything it means your DC sometimes having to come second which is really shit for them but what happens when you enter into a blended family

Nooo... You see this all the time on MN. Step children always having to come above resident children no matter what. People rarely consider how they feel because they are clouded by only concerning themselves with one child in the scenario.

No child should come second, they should be treated fairly and equally. Its not the resident childrens fault that their family is blended just as much as it isn't the SC's.

I really like the idea of your eldest having photo with baby and then your DSC having the same too. I think they'd look lovely next to each other and you get the picture you wanted too.

And it’s always the step mother who has to tie themselves in knots over the sensibilities of someone else’s child.

Perhaps everyone should just stay in miserable relationships so the world can continue to revolve around the offspring.

I'm gonna go against the grain and say put the canvas up. You've got pictures of the step-child up so it's not like you're totally excluding them.
I honestly don't get the whole "can't put your children pics up cos you might offend the step-child" what about offending your children?
I think go ahead put it up

Of course you can put it up. Its a picture of your kids. There is already a picture of step child in the lounge, I have pictures in my house of my children amd stepchild in different combinations. There is nothing wrong with that.

Yanbu op. Are you meant to never have anything/ do anything with your own children ever? I would go ahead and do this. I would also do a photo with the 3 of them as well. But you have a right as a mother to your DC to sometimes just want those moments with them.

“And it’s always the step mother who has to tie themselves in knots over the sensibilities of someone else’s child.”

It’s not tying yourself up in knots to avoid putting a socking great canvas of two of the three children of the house up on the wall! I wouldn’t put a canvas of one of my two biological children up on the wall. It’s just common sense.

Like others have said, keep the photo you have of your two children but don't hang it up as a centerpiece. Get a 3rd photo shoot where all of the children are included and make that your centerpiece.

It's not easy being a child from a broken family, you are often more vulnerable and you question if you are just as loved and welcomed as the "new family", that's why it's even more important to make sure to include your stepdaughter.

“And it’s always the step mother who has to tie themselves in knots over the sensibilities of someone else’s child.”

That in itself speaks volumes. It’s not just someone else’s child, it’s the OP’s step child and her husbands biological child. Her feelings are more important than the OP wanting a canvas on the wall of just her own children.

This thread is almost a copy of one a few months ago where the OP then wanted to go on a maternity photo shoot with all the family except for the step daughter. Exact same responses then.

Bubbas is a cute word BTW. I can't imagine being upset about using Bubbas for small children, one being a literal bub aka a newborn Some people are ridiculous

@Blackboot2 never saw that thread, wish I had now haha

@MamaDane some people are very snide and that ok.. luckily I don't associate in the real world with people that can take such offence at one word

Not been on here for a while.. if just been hiding all the kids pictures and locked them away never to be seen, loved or to have fun again (well until sc is here)

Her feelings are more important than the OP wanting a canvas on the wall of just her own children.

I disagree.