Aibu to be pissed parents have no life insurance

[pregnantforever]

Parents are in their 50s although my dad has the health of a 70year old. They don't take care of themselves and my dad moans every day about how awful his health is but rarely does anything about it.
He makes stupid decisions that are unsafe. Hes self employed and works lots of hours (manual job) with no need to (mortgage free, own their own car, have savings ect). He seems to almost brag about it. Last week sat saying he had had to work in the dark all day in a house where there was no light or electric, in the freezing cold with leaking water everywhere. We all pointed out that he had done this by choice, he's self employed and it's not worth risking his life for, he could have waited until the next day when some of those issues were sorted out but he didn't want to. We said we thought he was irresponsible and he walked off in a big mood.
I told my mum I hoped they had good life insurance if he was going to carry on making stupid decisions like that because she will be left growing old by herself, and she said they had none, and that there was no point in getting any because it would be expensive and their house was paid off anyway.
I don't think owning a house means much. If one of them needs care they will be up shit creek without a paddle. They both insist they want to stay in that house and never go into a care home ect, and my brother won't have anything to do with looking after them, he's not inclined like that. I have a spinal cord injury and don't want all of the burden of taking care of them or one of them being forced to sell up to pay for their care. Surely if they had life insurance then that would at least cover some costs should one of them take a turn? Or do I just need to keep my nose out massively and not worry? I've never asked anything about it before so had no idea they didn't have it.

@ssd hubby does not do "all of that for me", he did life insurance as his friend is a financial advisor, and he's sorted the house insurance & contents for the last few years.
I sort my own pensions and medical cover, car insurance, most household bills.
Actually the water and tv is in hubs name incase that makes me a child too?
God forbid we would have some kind of equal partnership or that sometimes one person wouldn't have a great understanding of something or would make an assumption. It doesn't really mean I can't manage my life.

@EnthusiasmIsDisturbed that's absolutely fine by me, so long as mum has a good life.

Can someone answer me a question please? Can somebody be forced to pay for a funeral if they have enough money in the bank but don't want to pay for it?

AlwaysSomethingThere, who has the money, the person who died?

Money cam be taken from the Estate for the funeral cost.

Anyone can refuse to pay for a relative's funeral cost. But cannot inherit without it being taken.

If it is your child you have a duty to bury him/her but anyone else just refuse to have anything to do with it.

Anyone can refuse to pay for a relative's funeral cost. But cannot inherit without it being taken.

You can refuse to pay for a relatives funeral but if you do that and there is no money in the estate then the relative will get a "paupers" funeral which is very basic and they will usually end up in a public grave with no plaque etc.

Even if there is a small amount of money in the estate there is nothing to stop one relative taking it and the rest being effectively forced to pay for the funeral. Having had to pay for MIL funeral, I feel strongly that if people haven't got much of an estate then they should take out insurance for a funeral.

We are seniors - what a crap word! - and have no life insurance. No-one will insure us because of our amazing collection of ill health!

No mortgage, bit of savings - what would we want it for, even if we could get it?

Lots of people do take out insurance for funerals. But the cost of funerals has risen so rapidly that most taken out a few years ago will not cover the costs.

My parents have no money and have said they are happy with a paupers funeral.

YANBU. My (divorced and single) parents have lost their own homes through through fecklessness, my mother is in sheltered accommodation and father in a housing association flat now.

Neither are good with money and have no savings, no stocks / shares, no life insurance or funeral cover.

They both don't take care of their health and will probably shorten their lives as a result. I feel sick with worry often, wondering how the fuck I will afford their funerals.

Lots of people do take out insurance for funerals. But the cost of funerals has risen so rapidly that most taken out a few years ago will not cover the costs.

True. They will have at least covered some of the costs though which is better than nothing. I still feel quite annoyed that we had to pay thousands for MIL funeral years ago. I don't think people realise that it is a cost that is pretty much forced onto relatives if they don't have an estate.

My parents have no money and have said they are happy with a paupers funeral.

It's easy for them to say that though isn't it? It's pretty grim for the relatives and also not nice for you to not have a grave to visit.

As funeral costs escalate and less people own houses and have reasonable amounts of savings or can afford funeral plans, this could be a problem in the future.

DM's small funeral , no cars, cost £3500 3 years ago, luckily it came out of the estate.

dragon Most people these days do not have a grave to visit. Far more common to have ashes to spread. At least amongst the people I know. Funerals are so expensive.

Your parents are in their 50's - you are being very premature in anticipating their deaths . Let life happen - none of us knows what is in our futures. If you are squealing because you might have to pay for their funerals, well don't. Nobody can force you .

Most people these days do not have a grave to visit. Far more common to have ashes to spread. At least amongst the people I know. Funerals are so expensive.

Even if cremated, people still usually have a memorial plaque to visit.

OP didn't mention the funerals Birdie6, I'm afraid we hijacked the thread slightly and it went off on a tangent of funeral costs

And most people with elderly parents who have money do inherit something.

Yes, OP didn't mention the funerals but I think that is one thing it is reasonable to be annoyed about although it does depend on how much savings they have and whether they are truly in very poor health.

I don't have life insurance but do have savings and a pension that will pay enough to cover a funeral if I die before I retire. Mortgage paid off too and so could always get a small mortgage again if necessary. for people without dependents and/or a lot of debt life insurance can be a bit of a con.

But why be annoyed if someone does not have the money to pay for a funeral? You do not need to pay for their funeral. They will be given a small service and buried or cremated. Where I am their ashes are scattered in an area of the cemetery. The same as happened to my friend who did pay for her funeral.

It sounds as though what's needed are pensions rather than life insurance which is not much use unless someone actually dies (or is terminally ill).

But why be annoyed if someone does not have the money to pay for a funeral?

I was annoyed because there would have been money if she hadn't spent it on other things.

You do not need to pay for their funeral. They will be given a small service and buried or cremated. Where I am their ashes are scattered in an area of the cemetery. The same as happened to my friend who did pay for her funeral.

It may depend on the area but where MIL died it wasn't even possible for relatives to attend a service if there was a paupers funeral and no option to have a plaque. I was very surprised that it was so basic although in retrospect not really surprising that councils will do whatever they can to try and make relatives pay.