Roses sent to daughter

[RosesAreWrong]

I’ve NC as this is potentially outing.

A big bunch of red, expensive looking roses have just arrived for my 7 year old daughter. Sent to her by an older boy who she fell out with some time back and for various reasons we have kept them “gone” as his family were way too full on and always trying to make out they were a couple (puke!)

Obviously it’s his mother who has done this but I feel uncomfortable about it.
I feel like this, way ott and slightly inappropriate gesture is just a pressure tool and just feels wrong.

I’m not sure what to do with them and DD has an after school activity so I have a bit of time.

Your instinct is the thing to follow here - so I'm glad that you have steered the whole matter away.

Yes - your DD is far too young to be bothered with this sort of 'romance'. It isn't appropriate AND she isn't interested.

Well done for protecting her so carefully and ignoring the social pressure.

Weird and I would feel uncomfortable too. Good idea to give to your neighbour.

I'd have returned them. Make it clear that it wasn't appropriate. Because it so, so isn't. I'd be concerned that the mother will assume that you're ok with her to step back into your life now you've accepted her flowers. But you know her better than I do, and if you think that rejecting the flowers might make her kick off again, then you've done the best thing.

It's definitely creepy. No sense in wasting pretty ford thigh, just dispose of the wrapping and card and don't tell DD they were for her. I know you don't want to speak to the mother but you need to send a clear message that this attention is unwanted.

She's a child - why is she receiving Valentine roses? This is beyond creepy.

Your need to be firm with your boundaries for both you and your DD.

DS had a friend like this (a girl the same age as him) and I tried to patch things up when they fell out but all it meant was an escalation in the batshit behaviour from the mother. Send the flowers back and Grey Stone them. People who have poor relational boundaries do not just see the error of their ways and stop.

Stick to your guns.

Don’t keep them - it’s an acceptance of a relationship that neither you or your daughter want. They need to go back - you can do it kindly but do it.

Bin them and ignore. Don't mention it to your dd. Or donate them to your local hospital chapel or old age home if nearby.
If you contact the mother she'll have got what she wanted - Contact again.