To be horrified at the amount of vile and insensitive responses

[Rowyourboat1234]

I’ve come back after not being on mumsnet for a long time and I’m horrified at some of the vile and insensitive responses on some threads. Why?! What is the point of that? If you have nothing nice to say, then don’t say anything. How about that for Feb challenge?

Heh. Good luck, OP. How long have you been away? Used to be nice here around 2004 ish but it's been exactly like you say since about 2009.

It won't happen, by the way. I reckon by the time this gets posted someone will have posted something bitchy. If not it will be along soon.

I’ve only joined 2 years ago to read various things about pregnancy which I found useful then I posted asking for advice on baby stuff and I got some lovely responses which were again helpful.

I can see now it’s all about AIBU, the other subjects get hardly any attention and it’s just about being mean and controversial. Obviously lots of well meaning people too, but boy I’m shocked. It’s very toxic.

I'm not sure many people in the world go on anonymous forums to be nice and polite to people. Also, this is a forum to ask whether one is being unreasonable, so if they are, people do want to tell them that they are and why.
If you don't like it.....

It’s always been like this, no worse now than before.

What threads are you talking about?

Why don't you hide AIBU then?

YABU

Surely if you’ve been her before you would know someone posts exactly the same as you about once a month.

YANBU. I'm convinced some people use AIBU as a place to vent their bad moods.

Yes, I’ll hide AIBU, thanks. Didn’t know you can do that since I’m hardly on here. Perhaps I’m leaving all together.

To tell people they are unreasonable does not equal calling them names or getting personal.

Perhaps this is for venting bad moods, but surely this is not going to improve your mood?!

I wish the other boards got more response. It'd be nice to have a decent conversation on a specific subject but you hardly get any responses unless you post on AIBU! But I do agree that posters on here can be particularly vile and goady. Ah well, it is the internet.

A discussion thread which requests a 'yes/no' answer is going to attract polarised opinions and naturally get heated.

I agree that personal insults are not acceptable but people passionately expressing their views/opinions isn't something to be discouraged.

welcome to the internet

It was when AIBU started that the rot did, I think

I agree with you OP.

I also agree with you. It is shit in AIBU and yet here I am

YANBU. There's a thread posted by someone with autism and some people on there are clearly enjoying putting the boot in. AIBU attracts the bitches who enjoy causing emotional pain, whether it's telling someone they're getting everything wrong, insisting that their partner is cheating on them (with the faux concern) or just putting them down. It's a shame because there are some really decent people on here. Mumsnet should do more to patrol the threads and kick people off who do that repeatedly but they don't.

@FriarTruck I totally agree with what you are saying.

I must have lived in a bubble and now woken up to reality.

Yes I know what you mean, it's like some just pounce on any opportunity to willfully misread or misconstrue what you say- and you NEVER get the benefit of the doubt on anything

What does it say about feminists today that by far the most popular sub on a favourite website is all about asking other people to help them judge whether they're being unreasonable?!

It’s cheaper than therapy and people can vent their frustrations. There was a nasty one this morning with a massive pile on, which has been deleted now. Sadly the pack mentality comes into play. Sometimes responses are funny but we should be mindful that there is a human at the other end of the screen. It’s easy to get carried up in that piss taking emotion and forgetting the human side.

And yes, there are regularly threads on this subject.

YANBU. I also cannot believe how vile, spiteful and plain nasty people can be, quite often to people who are vulnerable and in need of help and support. I'm not quite sure why I come on here really. It's quite upsetting.

Didntwanttochangemyname The thing is that one can give an honest response that is, at the same time, helpful, kind and compassionate.

Do the "mum test" - would you say what you're about to post to your mum or boss face-to-face? If not, why would you post it to a stranger?

I honestly don’t know why some people are arsed with MN. The fucking moaning that goes on these days is ridiculous. Stop logging on, go and bleach your tiles in the bathroom or rearrange your food cupboard or whatever.

Yes,last week there was grumbling about no Like button/edit then there was grumbling about the acronyms. Now this.

This site doesn't seem up to scratch for a lot of people.

bringincrazyback

I'm convinced some people use AIBU as a place to vent their bad moods

No shit