To ask to much you drink when in charge of your child?

[meow1989]

Just wondered as to what everyone's idea of a sensible limit is?

If DH is drinking a couple of beers I'll tend not to, but tonight fancied a glass of prosecco (home measure so about 200ml). Had poured myself another but then put it back as I didn't have dinner (big lunch) and we have a 7 month old DS.

My thinking is if I need to I'll be able drive if I absolutely needed to and I'll wake easily if DS does (still in our room, sleeps through except for dummy wakes, only cosleep in morning after 6.30 bottle).

DH doesn't necessarily think like this and didn't see anything wrong with us both having a second (absolutely amicable brief conversation as to why I put mine back) so I'm just curious as to what everyone else sets as their limit?

And how do you know it will be a sick child and not a child who fell out of bed and bumped his face

YABU if you’d waste the NHS’s time by going to A&E for that anyway! Are you people running to hospital for every single bump?

WhatTheNightBrings of course I have friends who don’t drink (for reasons of religion/taste/health/former unhealthy relationship with alcohol) and respect that. I just don’t happen to know anyone who enjoys a drink in moderation but would avoid doing so in the evening because they think an unlikely emergency might arise like a child seriously injuring themselves falling out of bed.

Oh FFs 😂😂😂

Do people really avoid having more than one drink in case peacefully sleeping children suddenly develop an illness that will require instant, complicated decisions, perhaps a trip to A&E and possible social services involvement if alcohol is smelt on a parent’s breath?

When we had DD1, DH and I did agree that in general we’d make sure that one of us was always sober enough to drive but since neither of us really drink at the best of times, it wasn’t a big deal.

I don’t drink full stop..... seen what alcoholism does to a family as had 2 grandparents with it , also practically grew up in a pub (several family m3mbers worked in the local) so I’ve seen what alcohol does, not gonna lie I did drink when I was about 15 in the park with my friends but I’ve never been drunk, I was always the sober one walking everyone Home.

Right. Child hits his eye on the corner of his bedside table. There’s blood. Might need stitches. Are we allowed to trouble A&E with that? Please?

LaBelleSauvage
For God's sake don't drink hot chocolate either. Will no one think of the children

Nothing. I haven’t had a alcoholic drink since I found out I was pregnant with my first. I like knowing I can drive if needed.

What do people do if they have a night out ? With babysitter at home til say 11 -12. We've had a couple of very rare date nights where grandparents have babysat then left when we've got in -a bit pissy as we hardly ever drink - but not hammered. Everything's been ok 😳

I don’t drink at home when my kids are there (which is all the time really). Not saying it’s wrong to do so, it’s just a personal preference of mine. I only really like to drink to get drunk though, which isn’t often really and I only like to get drunk in social situations. Never been one for drinking at home.

My kid doesn’t have a bedside table. Therefore I can drink as much as I like! Though I’m sure there are other million-to-one scenarios that would require me to go to A&E at night, in which case I’d get a taxi or ring my Dad (who doesn’t drink because of his medication).

What do people do if they have a night out ? With babysitter at home til say 11 -12. We've had a couple of very rare date nights where grandparents have babysat then left when we've got in -a bit pissy as we hardly ever drink - but not hammered. Everything's been ok 😳
I would think this was completely normal!! (but then I seem especially negligent compared to a lot of PP on here!)

This has not gone the way I though it would! I was sure I'd get a resounding "you're being ridiclous".

For anyone concerned I finished my drink about 2 hours ago so we're good here!

I'm surprised at so many not drinking at all or just having 1 glass of wine just in case of an emergency. Do you keep doing that for 18+ years?
I'm not a particularly big drinker but I'll sometimes share a bottle of wine with DH. Tonight we've both had a nice glass of Bailey's. I have a ridiculously annoying cough and Bailey's has helped it a lot. I'm perfectly able to be caring for my 2 sleeping junior school age children but I wouldn't drive now.
If we suddenly had a medical emergency it would be a taxi, ambulance (if serious enough) or asking a neighbour for a lift. We are only 15mins from a major hospital so a taxi journey or lift isn't too big a deal. It's probably cheaper than the hospital parking fees.
I don't feel neglectful for sometimes having a drink. I also don't feel bad drinking at home as we very rarely go out in the evening because of being in for our children.
If either of them were ill or if they are doing sonething like a camp or sleepover where they might need us to drive to collect them, then at least one of us would avoid drinking so we could drive if needed.

What do people do if they have a night out

I always drive so don’t drink when out. But even if not driving, I just drink soft drinks.

@meow1989 for some reason these threads always go this way. But then look at the time of posting. Anyone having a good time drinking on a Saturday night won't be on MN.

Fwiw I'm teetotal but in my drinking days I definitely was over the limit on occasion. And I hold down a responsible job. 🤷🏻‍♀️

Do people really avoid having more than one drink in case peacefully sleeping children suddenly develop an illness that will require instant, complicated decisions

No one I know.

Pre 2yo one glass max. Now she's 7 prob more if I want to....

It's a bit like the 'how much alcohol do you drink a week?' threads.

They tend to attract the eager teetotallers so it gives a skewed result!

It seems silly to constantly avoid drinking in case of an emergency. In a genuine emergency I’d call an ambulance, if it was urgent but not an emergency I’d call a taxi

Yup. Me too. My husband works away and my neighbour pops round for a natter and a glass or two of vino when the kids are asleep.
Whilst not totally incompetent, I wouldn't get into the car and drive.
I'd call a taxi. No shame in that.

Do you keep doing that for 18+ years?

Well as I don’t drink at home in my own and never have, I doubt i’ll Suddenly start once they’re able to get themselves to A&E just for the sake of it. who knows, maybe i’ll get a partner who likes a drink at the weekends and i’ll join him. I’ll move the bedside table first though

I don't think this thread represents most parents. I move in pretty cautious, health and safety conscious suburban circles and not once has any parent not drunk alcohol due to have children asleep upstairs.

Thankfully none of the parents I am friends with are aggressive, horrible or stupid when drunk. I genuinely think most of them could be fairly drunk and be utterly alert if an emergency unexpectedly arouse....although healthy children probably don't come to harm very often while asleep in their bedrooms.....

This type of thread does seem to attract particular types of responses. Yes I know some people don't enjoy drinking and that's fine, but it's very rare for someone to go teetotal after having children and I don't believe that this thread is at all representative.

After the first few responses some people might be reluctant to be the one who breaks the chain by saying that they each have a few drinks some times in the evening, because this very common behaviour is being made out to be a potentially fatal form of child neglect.

It also makes no sense. If a couple is at home alone together, should they stay sober in case one of them has a terrible accident?

Meow - if you want a realistic answer, I'd ask your friends. I have never heard anyone in real life say one of them would stay sober at all timEs. We socialise a lot in our home, with all walks of life, and we've all enjoyed many a bottle or three whilst the kids sleep peacefully upstairs, with no one ever abstaining. This is definitely o d of those topics where mn is a parallel universe.