Mortifying situation

[PooleySpooley]

I am doing futher education through my work.

I am a professional and now have to do one of the core subjects which I never achieved at GCSE (not English), lied about but couldn’t produce the certificate so have to do an evening class.

I have started, it’s a small group of very mixed abilities and there is a teacher and a TA type person.

Tonight she stood over me twice (while I was trying to remember the basics and was perfectly capable of doing them) and then she sat next to me and was doing the work with me - asking questions to help me like I am about 5.

I said I think I have this thanks but she seemed really upset and offended.

WTF do I do? I am quite intelligent am not an idiot but I just didn’t manage to get this at school

PooleySpooley I'm really sorry to hear about the disruption to your schooling because of something so serious.

Cannot quite believe how twattish some posters are being.

OP in your shoes I would just be honest with the TA one more time and say you would like to work through things alone and if she keeps on sitting by you tell the teacher.

I cannot do maths to save my life so am in awe of anyone who can.

Yikes MitziK that's a very long and unpleasant post. Is it really OK to tar all middle aged students with the same brush? Are they all resistant and nasty?

FMD

🌷you don’t need to give your life story just because a few twats are interrogating you for sport.

Just tell the TA to step away from your desk and no one will get hurt!

🤣

99%. What did you get wrong?

🤣😂 I’m channelling my Dad!!

I’m sorry to hear all you went through years ago and the repercussions of it still now. You own those big girl
Pants, just remember to wear them to the next class!

I’m not sure what the problem is. I feel that you are projecting on to the TA. She offered you help that you didn’t want, you said that you were ok, and she stopped?

I’m wondering what the real problem is. Are you angry that you have to take this course?
There are quite a few contradictory elements about this. I wonder if it’s bringing up mixed emotions?

Pinkcottonshirt " She offered you help that you didn’t want, you said that you were ok, and she stopped?"

The OP said "Tonight she stood over me twice ... and then she sat next to me and was doing the work with me ...

I said I think I have this thanks but she seemed really upset and offended."

So that's the problem. The OP doesn't want or need the help but the OP is sensing the TA is "really upset and offended."

Most of us don't want to make others feel like that but I think OP you just need to be really clear with her. I'd not say 'I don't need help." I'd say "I prefer to work alone."

but the OP is sensing the TA is "really upset and offended."

She could check that out with the TA at the next class.

Wow the comments about the OP as a SICK CHILD are outrageous here.

OP - well done for going back to do this. While it may seem easy now, so many people do struggle with any maths so I'd say that's the person the TA was looking to help.
Continued best wishes for your studies.

So many ridiculous criticisms. You’re an adult and you know how you learn best. You don’t need to justify your past here. Have a word with the TA after class and explain that you’re managing fine and that people standing in back of you/ too much attention makes you nervous and ask her to stop.

FS is taught at five levels: Entry Levels 1, 2 and 3, plus Level 1 and Level 2.

Level 2 is the GCSE equivalent, so I'm assuming that's the Level you need.

In FS we do Initial Assessment to find out the basic level a person is working at, then a diagnostic to find out where they are within that level e.g. Level 1, 85% means the person is working at Level 1 standard, and got 85% of questions at that level right. They are not yet working at Level 2 standard. There is a big gap between L1 and L2.

99% would be a diagnostic score - but if that was at Level 1 or any of the Entry Levels then you didn't find it a "piece of piss" because the Initial Assessment determined you to be lower than L2.

I'd be astounded if anyone got 99% at Level 2 after twenty years.

If it was 99% at Level 1 then you will be doing Level 2, but you still need to learn quite a bit to get to Level 2 pass mark from Level 1, 99%.

I don't understand why you're so mortified? You didn't want help, you said so, you were possibly a bit abrupt, the TA seemed offended. All pretty small beer? By next week I'm sure it will be forgotten about - if not, she'll think twice before asking you if you want help again, which is a win surely.

Oops posted too soon!

If you were my student and got 99% at L2 I'd be booking your exams and being happy that my data was going to go up early.

Do tell the teacher your learning preferences, it helps us to help you achieve your best. I'm not a fan of hovering - I tend to use a quick, "Everything Ok?" with my adults and move on if they say yes.

I don't think it's a mortifying situation but I would have found it embarrassing to feel I was singled out. It's just my personality though I'm getting less shy as I get older, mainly through exposure.

I could so easily have been in this situation. I breezed through every subject except maths. I'd been fine but was ill in the GCSE years and as such it quickly got where I hadn't got a clue what they were talking about in maths because I'd missed concepts they were now building on... and I was too shy to ask for support.
I failed my mock and it wasn't getting any better. Two weeks before the exam a friend's parent who was a maths teacher took pity on me and recommended a textbook. I crammed and did well, but it could so easily have been different.
Just go to the classes, do the work and it'll be over before you know it.

@PooleySpooley ignore the vipers on here!
Well done for getting back to education to progress yourself, some people find it best to work things out for themselves so it just clicks into place and not be spoon fed - in this situation that was you. Don't worry, the TA needs to recognise she's there to help, not to suffocate and stifle.
I'd perhaps forget it, or if you feel the need to email the teacher just say you feel a bit suffocated and would prefer to ask for help if you're not working it out yourself fast enough, but want the chance to figure it out for yourself first - 'no offence'
Good luck sounds like you had a crappy time with the cancer and drugs - you're clearly a fighter, fighters don't need nannying they get support when they need it
🌟

I don’t know why everyone is being so hostile and prickly on this thread. OP’s life may not have been an easy straight line from GCSEs to employment, but that doesn’t mean she deserves to be patronised and sneered at by you lot. Overcoming childhood cancer and a drug addiction are challenges most of us can’t dream of dealing with.

OP, I would just try and have a word with the teacher and TA. Explain that you find it very difficult to be put on the spot, and that you would prefer to come to them if you neee help rather than have them spot checking you.

You’re not in school, you’re an adult - they should be respectful of the fact that you know what makes you tick and are entitled to have some autonomy over the way you learn best.

Some right knobs on this thread again. OP i would just say 'Iearn best when Im just left to figure it out on my own. Ill give you a shout if i need some help thanks' .

She sounds annoying. Several friends have got jobs as TAs they are totally unqualified in that (though very qualified in other unrelated things). I was surprised you could just walk into that job so may mean she is clueless

So you committed fraud then. Lyed about having a qualification to obtain a paid job when you infact never achieved that qualification! Are you a professional really?

Lied - sorry

I would email the teacher, and explain. To be honest it sounds like bad practice, it is well known that people freeze when being observed. And in the first lesson too. If you had been doing it for some time and been observed by your work to be struggling, then that might have been a different issue.

I think that you think you’re ‘above’ being helped by a TA.
You’re not. She’s just doing her job.

Speak to the teacher before the next session. If the TA isn’t meant to be helping, then why is she there?

Im in a similar position OP. 45, never got maths, though unlike you I did sit it and fail it, had a very disruptive school year got very few GCSEs but enough to do a levels and a degree. Never needed maths, don't know but I'm considering a career change so I think it will be useful.
I have few basics, don't know my times tables for eg but helped my ds with his algebra homework yesterday.
I chose an online course so I could control teacher pupil contact better and move at my own pace. It may be worth you looking at online instead, a tutor is a mouse click away but not over your shoulder.

Why are so many people having a dig at the op? She hasn't asked for advice on not having the qualification, or having lied about having the certificate, she has asked for advice on what to do about a hovering ta.
Op, you've had some good advice, just say, it makes me uncomfortable when you watch me, it makes me freeze. Say it with a smile, and she should understand, and tbh, if she doesn't that's her problem not yours.

Teacher is probably trying to access your capabilities. Once they see you are capable they will leave you to it.

The OP might be a ‘professional’ but she can’t do maths...unlike the TA who can and is there to help her learn.

This is about OP’s wounded pride over being given direction by someone she considers as much lower in status. The TA isn’t doing anything wrong - OP is irritated by her because the TA doesn’t give a shit whether or not OP is a professional, she’s just treating her the same as everyone else.

Just tell the TA that you don't need her help and it makes you feel awkward. That's all you need to do. It's her job to help the class - she isn't psychic!

Don't email the teacher, you'll look like a twat.