To find my child's lack of crawling upsetting?

[incywincyspide]

My son is nearly 12 months old and is still commando crawling. He started doing this about 3 months ago and still hasn't started crawling properly.

On Sunday he did start crawling differently but by using one knee and one foot!

I feel like he's falling behind other babies his age and I'm getting worried! Am I being ridiculous? It's my first child so I tend to worry about every little thing.

Mine didn’t go in for rolling or crawling much - he did this weird pivot shuffle that was basically him trying to stand up :) I’m sorry to say that I’m like smuggy mcsmugface, he then went straight to standing and walked at 10 months. I’m also part of an nct group and really love how they all do their own thing despite being so close in age. I wasn’t really around small babies much so it’s all new to me.

DC3 sort of skipped crawling. Did a late, quick blitz around 10 months then walked at 12 months. Yours may just decide to walk instead in the next couple of months.

I’ve known SO many non-crawling late walkers (between 18-20 months) who are now totally athletic, bright, happy teens. DC1 crawled early, walked at 11 months, showed total agility early on. You’d have thought, “Folks, we have ourselves a future power walking-mountain climbing-Olympic sprinting athlete.”

He’s coming up on 17 and hates sports and all physical activity. Sitting with a nose in a book, drawing, or on a screen is not what I envisioned when he was 12 months old. I’m not disappointed (before anyone suggests anything). But development is such a broad experience. Try not to worry. We tend to fear and there really is nothing to fear but fear itself. You’ll be amazed by how quickly and suddenly babies just snap to and ‘get it’. He’s your first and you have no basis of comparison- only books/websites which suggest what milestones should occur by when. These are helpful guidelines but they’re very loose ones, OP. I’d worry if he were totally placid and showing no interest in moving. But that’s so not the case. He’s just doing it at his pace.

My two sons were ridiculously late with toilet training. And you just can’t rush babies. My mum used to always tell me, ‘don’t worry. He won’t be hauling his tommie tippie seat to his exams.’ That always made me laugh.

Your little one will not be army crawling through the school gates in a few years.

Mirri is clearly the most competitive annoying member of their nct WhatsApp group

My son does keep surprising me with other things which he seems to learn out of thin air! Perhaps he'll surprise me with some spurt in his gross motor skills at some point!

And again, thanks to all the helpful posters - very interesting reading

My Ds didn't crawl, he swam across the floor. Then went straight to standing then walking.

The books/google are actually quite unhelpful about this - you get lots of 'your baby will be doing this at this age' with a very small disclaimer about later being normal too. Weirdly, US sites routinely give younger ages (they are often quite insistent that all four month olds roll) - I don't know why their babies would be more advanced but they seem to expect them to be! In any case, if OP can see that every baby around her crawls then I don't think it's that strange that it worries her even if she could find information saying hers is within the range of normal.

Both of my DC didn't walk until around 15 months old.

TBH Mine was placid and not showing interest at 1 Vanguard. She was totally fine, just not bothered, I used to place toys out of her reach to encourage her and she'd play with her fingers or toes!

Even at 10 she will not do things until she is totally ready to do them, you just cannot force her and I have learned to respect her personality in that way.

It really does seem like my son is the only one with his own style! Perhaps he'll be a famous designer or some such

Plus, he's the most handsome man I've ever seen.

You said you were worried he was falling behind other babies, and being upset that other mums are 'smug' about their children who are crawling.
Any baby book would tell you that he's perfectly within the normal range development wise, but that isn't the issue, it is? He isn't keeping up with the Joneses and it's bugging you.

What a very bizzare turn this thread has taken!

When my ds wasn't sitting at 6 months, I worried about him (because both my dd's ha) and looked around at the other babies wobbly sitting thinking, 'I wish ds was doing that'. When he still wasn't sitting at 7, 8, 9, 10 months...my worry was getting worse, and it was mixed in with upset that other babies were rolling and crawling and sitting and eating solids. My concerns were about his development (and were right, he was 'falling behind the other babies' - not in a failing a test way...not in a not winning the race way....in a things aren't right and I am feeling a tumult of emotions about this way)

Now ds did have problems which affected his development, but I remember having that similar tumult of emotions - worry, upset, looking at other children and comparing what they were doing with my own....with dd1 and 2.'Keeping up with the Joneses' what the fuck?! I was just worrying along with every other fucker out there!

At 20 months she would walk holding my hand for reassurance, then one day she just let go and walked into a shop after her Granny. You should have seen the look of shock on my face, my jaw just dropped! I didn't know what to do!

Dd crawls like this, one knee and one foot

It’s hilarious, she’s very fast

My ds didn't crawl at all. He used to roll and then walked at 16 months. DD didn't crawl until 20 months and didn't walk until 23 months.

In OP's case, if she were worried about development (and for some reason had no idea about development ages, having done zero research yet) , a quick Google could have reassured all was fine.

This is almighty bollocks. I was the Queen of Google when it came to all 3 dcs, and believe me it did chuff all to reassure me.

Definitely what I've heard described elsewhere as a 'first baby problem'.

Those with 2nd babies are probably questioning why you want him to be more mobile when it;'s good you can pop him on the floor go to the kitchen to pop the kettle on and immediately return without returning to a scene of utter devastation.

He'll do it in his own time - or like you, one day he will just pull himself up and walk.

I know I'd prefer a baby to stay put.....

Incidentally the most annoying kind of smug smugger is the sort who goes on about 'how annoying' it is that their baby is doing everything early. There was one in my NCT group who rolled over a few weeks before the others and to listen to her mother it was the greatest hardship anyone had ever endured, 'and to make it worse it probably means she'll be crawling at six months, what a nightmare that will be!' (said baby is now seven months and stationary)

Also, I sort of think that people who find it annoying that babies become mobile should have just got a doll?

It's so hard but really try not to get drawn into this competitive parenting, there's SO much of it, maybe that's what Miri was trying to express in her own way.

Just enjoy the lovely baby years, sometimes wish I could revisit them now DD is all hormonal and starting Puberty!

God, reading this thread has brought back all the horrid memories I have of bloody NCT and toddler groups. Full of bloody women constantly competing through their children. I remember one mum whose child started walking at 7 months which was great except that the child couldn't stand-up or sit down, just walk, so had a tantrum every time they wanted something off the floor (all the time). I can't remember a more unhappy child.

Dont worry about it OP, your boy sounds like he is a unique and free thinker! And yes, enjoy it while you can, this phase goes so quickly.

Also, I sort of think that people who find it annoying that babies become mobile should have just got a doll?

I sometimes think that! I’m on my third baby and am still happy when they reach their milestones (walking, crawling etc). I’ve never seen them moving as an inconvenience! Mine were much happier when they weren’t stuck in one place.

The humblebrag is the worst.

'Oh god she's pulling herself up and I'm soooo worried about her getting my cup of tea 🤦🏻‍♀️🤦🏻‍♀️🤦🏻‍♀️'

Move your tea then...

@incywincyspide

Mirri is clearly the most competitive annoying member of their nct WhatsApp group winkgrin

Nah, MirriVan just doesn't believe in having children as she thinks bringing people into this evil world is inherently child abuse (threads passim). Therefore I'd take what she has to say about parenting with a reasonably large pinch of salt