To find my child's lack of crawling upsetting?

[incywincyspide]

My son is nearly 12 months old and is still commando crawling. He started doing this about 3 months ago and still hasn't started crawling properly.

On Sunday he did start crawling differently but by using one knee and one foot!

I feel like he's falling behind other babies his age and I'm getting worried! Am I being ridiculous? It's my first child so I tend to worry about every little thing.

Ignore her. Some parents love to compare so they can brag how advanced their kids are like it’s a reflection on their superior parenting (I have come across one like this before)

There will come a time when your child is doing something hers isn’t yet, so you could be evil and constantly ask her about that! I’d just reply “fine thanks” and not engage any further.

One of mine never crawled, only bum shuffled, then at 14mo stood up, started walking and running all in the space of a week! No Christina just took off on his own. Wasn’t prepared for that at all!!!

I remember with ds1 I was exactly like you. I phoned the doctor because I was convinced there was something wrong when he was about 10 months. He hadn’t rolled over nor had he made any attempt to crawl. I was beside myself.

He’s 4 and a half now and perfectly normal. My DS2 is a whole other kettle of fish - can’t keep him in the one place at 8 months

I'll probably look back in a couple of months and wonder what I was worried about 🤷🏻‍♀️

My 10 month old has only just started commando crawling, he was rolling everywhere before this! Every baby is so different, my first one was textbook, but this little guy is more about taking it easy 😁
Don't compare your beautiful baby to anyone else's, and sod smug mums! Knobs!

Solidarity over the baby group anxiety! My nearly 7 month old is apparently the only one not sitting independently (though I think some of them are playing fast and loose with the definition of independently) - I'm now back at work so don't really see them and one of them texted me especially to ask how he's getting on with his sitting?! Why on earth does she care?! Hers, of course, is on the verge of crawling...

I could not agree more with MigGril my 2 favourite play groups are for children aged 0-3 and 1-4. So much better, I’ve never noticed any of that competivness there. The one where they’re all within a couple of months of each other is a pain for everyone comparing. At the minute it’s number of words!!!

Apparently, I never crawled. I assure you that I walk perfectly now and ended up with a PhD

Really, it's nothing to worry about.

I don't think crawling is a thing all babies do. I shuffled on bum - as my DM delights in telling people...

Some babies never crawl, according to my mother I didn't! I've also known a few who didn't crawl.

They bottom travel and then one day pull themselves up and walk.

So please don't worry.

I didn't crawl at all. DS crawled very late and I think he only learnt because he saw other babies at his nursery doing it. He didn't walk until he was about 16 months old.

And I wouldn't want a child who could walk before they were 1. Exhausting running around after them!

I can absolutely guarantee you that he will not be crawling around on his belly at 18.

Enjoy your baby for how he is. Dont worry about what you can't control.
In 6 months you will barely remember this concern, so don't let it spoil what you have now.

My nephew always commando-crawled, never got up on hands and knees, and was 16 months when he walked. His brother walked before he was 1 year old.

They're all different. I might have worried at the time, same as you, but with hindsight and seeing loads of babies develop, it's nothing out of the ordinary.

Oh, and my own dd1 was a bum-shuffler.

Don’t worry at all. I tied myself in knots about DS as he didn’t really move, just sat there and watched the world. He just played with what he could reach and didn’t move. Then when he was about 15 months old he got up and walked across the room. I don’t know which one of us were more shocked. I think he had been practicing in secret or something as he barely wobbled. Within a fortnight I was wishing for my sedentary baby as he made up for lost time in the “getting into every bloody thing” stakes.

My DD spent ages rolling to wherever she wanted to be - literally spin on her back to line up then roll to destination. Because she could only commando crawl backwards! HVs said if they can get around they are less motivated to experiment with alternatives- hence bum shufflers walk later because they have a hands free method of locomotion. We have a dog so DD also experimented with carrying things in her mouth once she sussed crawling.

Looks like lots of us had non crawlers, neither of my boys crawled. One rolled everywhere then bum shuffled, the other pulled to stand then took off running. scared the bejesus out of me. Both now adults and fully functioning, one was sporty the other not so much.

Actually DD only really learned fast crawling well after walking as a means of escape - much harder to capture a crawling child as you have to bend to grab - and usually they head under a chair or table!

They all do things at diff times, and there is all the mum whose child has run faster whilst hopping on one leg🙈😂 oh god just wait until one starts talking..... best to distance yourself now!!!

My DS for instance couldn’t sit up till 10 months and would face plant everywhere but crawled early. His speech didn’t come properly till he was 2.5 and only at 3 we could actually understand him.

Potty training wasn’t until 3 years 5 months as he didn’t get it. He’s four in March and looking at his peers who would know what ages they all did things?! And who cares?!

My little boy commando crawled at 9 months then moved on to bum shuffling. He walked at just shy of 18 months. He was the last of all his friends to walk and I even had one ‘friend’ express concern that he wasn’t walking yet which was ridiculous as HV don’t worry at all until 18 months about lack of walking and even then they told me that they wouldn’t immediately push for a referral. I’m on baby number 2 now. She’s 7 nearly 8 months and showing no signs of crawling yet. I’m not worried in the slightest. My little boy is now 27 months and he can walk, run, jump well and is actually doing great with his language acquisition, comprehension and is very emotionally intelligent. I don’t think age or style of crawling or walking has any impact on development in the longer term. When it’s your first it’s hard not to worry and compare but try not to. Just enjoy them as they don’t stay small for long.

Something to remember is that 'Smuggy McSmuggison' mum is probably shitting herself about something else and trying to compensate.

My baby walked early, talked early, and I could have been perceived to be 'smug' about it... but I was just melting with relief because she had spent the first six months of her life SCREAMING constantly, never ever content, and I had spent those six months in hell with worry that my baby wasn't a placid little bundle of smiles like all the other babies in my group, being the supplicant taking every bit of advice that didn't work about how to keep her happy, feeling like a useless mum (I wasn't, she just had CPMA but she was nearly 1 by the time I worked that out). So anything she did that made it seem she was OK and not fundamentally broken (honestly I googled 'depression in babies' and every lesser-known disease including brain tumours in the wee small hours I was so anxious about her constant sadness) I was ready to shout from the rafters. Not smug, just so relieved. But yes I can imagine in retrospect how it came across.

There will be something 'everyone else's baby' is doing that Smuggy's isn't, and in the wee hours of the night that will be the only thing she thinks about. Just don't let her get to you and focus on your own amazing baby.

My DD barely crawled, did about 15 seconds of furniture cruising, or it seemed, and walked at 11months. But then she said very little until after two, when others had torrents of speech.

Her cousin walked at about 14 months, thought it was a shit idea and went back to bum shuffling for months. Her parents kept saying: She can walk and accepted the situation with grace and humour, pointing out her indolent nature.

Babies are 1) All different 2) They embarrrass/ worry parents in equal measure.

I think messages from NCT group might just be genuine interest/giving you a chance to talk about something you're worried about, rather than trying to make you feel bad. But I get it can be frustrating, even if people are trying to be nice if it feels like something is wrong (see also concerned questions about feeding and sleeping). I don't know about crawling but 14 month DS seems to have missed some pages of of the baby manual (no pointing for example). I went through a phase of worrying and now I try and accept he'll have his own way of doing things and to relax. But easier said than done! Hope you're feeling better about it.

DD1 only ever did the dragging one leg thing... then walked between 12 and 13 months. DD2 crawled from 6 months... then walked between 12 and 13 months. Honestly it makes no difference!

DS didn't crawl until he could walk and he was a late walker (19 months old).

He's 3 now and can keep up with his peers no problem.

They're all different, try not to worry.

Neither I or my DH crawled - went straight from bum shuffling to walking. DC1 bum shuffled at about 10 months, started crawling the week before turning 1 and walked at 17 months.

I remember our joint first NCT birthday party and our child was the only one not walking, despite being the oldest, due to being born at 35 weeks.

At 9 months DC2 has decided crawling is rubbish (due to only being able to go backwards), so prefers trying to stand and walk.

Everyone does get there in the end, try to ignore the over competitive parents. The one in our NCT group has now cut herself off and it is a relief not to have her telling us all the amazingly advanced things her child was doing all the time