To be sacked due to sick children?

[Spamup]

Regular user but have NC for this!

My children, DS and DD both under 3 have several bouts of sickness before christmas and today my DS is not well which has resulted in a hospital admission - my employet has casually mentioned before about how i would probably be better off not working but nothing has been written down regarding this - ff to this evening, it has been sent to the HR department for formal disciplinary process to start and i am in bits - i am a lone parent and no family or friends to support me with emergancy childcare as they all work full time - can i really lose my job over this? I have bills etc to pay and worked a long time in this field to get to where i am now :(

Why do people give ‘advice’ when it’s totally incorrect?🤦‍♀️ I wish people would actually look up the law before making statements regarding the law as if it’s fact!

Sorry to hear you’re going through such a stressful time Spamup

I had a Settlement Agreement off my last employer. Basically myself and a guy in the office did the same job and they wanted to make one of us redundant. I was better at the job (he was the office clown and did jack shit), but he’d been there longer than me. Meaning if they made him redundant they’d have to pay more money out than making me redundant (I got my manager to admit this, as I suspected it was the case). So to save going through the redundancy process and pay more money they offered me a settlement agreement. Basically they paid me to take redundancy ( I wasn’t entitled to redundancy as I’d been there less than 2 years).

As part of that agreement they had to offer money towards a solicitor who could review the agreement and give me legal advice. I found a great one specialising in employment law and when they tried to shaft me on the monetary figures she ripped them a new arsehole. I took the payout, mainly because I didn’t want to work for a company like that anymore and it worked in my favour as I’ve been with my current employer for over 5 years and they are fabulous.

Glad you’ve spoken to ACAS, they are right that you don’t sign anything until you’ve had that legal advice.

What I will say is, should you choose to take the money and run, maybe you could look at a job where you can work from home? You’ve said this would be way easier for you in terms of flexibility so could that be something you can look into? Maybe start checking out a few jobs now so you get a head start if you need it?

This job doesn’t really give you the flexibility you need, so I’d say it may be worth looking for something else that fits in better for you anyway. WFH sounds like it could be the ideal career move (I work from home and it really is a game changer!)

You’ve been pretty strong so far, taking on board everyone’s comments and and advice and it’s clear you’re doing your best to find a solution.

I hope this situation works out for the best for you

maybe you could look at a job where you can work from home?

Most employers require that you have childcare arranged, and rightly so. You can't care for children and work. But I agree that if you can work from home, then it may be easier to care for sick children from time to time

VanGoght's advice is spot on

Looks like your time at your company is coming to an end. Still, st least you're not being fired but walking away with a compromise agreement and hopefully an agreed form reference

spamup
i’ve done a quick calculation and i think a nanny two days a week would be cheaper ..
also nanny will look after child when they are ill
they take them to doctors
they will help with any cooking /tidying/laundry related to children ..
so all round a better deal than nursery
get someone experienced with a few nannying years behind them with good references and they will be reliable !!! 👍

Can you not joins union to give you some representation? Pretty sure an employer cannot sack you with out due process ie spoken warning followed by first written etc etc!! Also dependency leave is completely separate from personal sick leave,I think they are not following process unless you’ve been their less than 12 wk.

I’ve just picked up this thread. I’m really sorry you have so much to deal with. I hoe your ds will feel better soon.

Your employer has decided they want you out so I think you need to look into how you get the settlement you want and check out the situation regarding benefits.

Dh signed a settlement agreement last year with his employer. In yours you want there to be an offer to pay an employment lawyer. You will need probably around £500. Find out which law firm your company uses and contact them to recommend a good firm. Or go by reputation if you know someone, who has used a certain firm.

The first circa 30k is tax free. We are nearing the end of the tax year. Therefore if you end up receiving too much to get means tested benefits they will kick in on 6th April.

Pps are correct a settlement means than you will be leaving by mutual consent and not made redundant. This is so they can fill your position. You will have to find out implications for claiming benefit before signing this agreement as the cash may have to last you to the beginning of April.

frufru27 they have followed process up to date. Op didn't engage last time.

Absence is absence. They can manage the absence on the last five months. The year off doesn't factor in it.

They can manage the OP for this.

Oh yes and get a reference agreed as part of the deal. It will probably be a standard x worked her between these dates.

Can people stop saying the ops nursery is ridiculously expensive. £75 a day is really quite normal in London/south east and why women often find it difficult to go back to work

£75 a day is really quite normal in London/south east and why women often find it difficult to go back to work

Ah but according to lots of people it's easy to get a job working from home, that pays loads, you can do without using childcare and do whatever hours you want.

So really those women could work.

So sorry to hear about your situation, OP. Just came to this thread now and although I realise that it won't help you, I can only say that you live in the wrong country. In many European countries, you have the right to take time off with sick children. It's the taxpayer that picks up the cost, not the employer. All of these family friendly policies are there to make it easier for parents, especially women, to contribute in the work place. It's a bit sad to see so many on here, although trying to give advice, almost blaming you for taking so much time off - when you don't have a choice. The onus should not be on the individual, but on society. People are being so duped in the UK; you tend to blame yourselves, when the problem is systemic. To answer your question: I don't think you're being unreasonable, no. And your employer is probably not being unreasonable either, under the circumstances. The various governments of the UK are, however. They should really start taxing certain people more and make sure that the UK is up to speed on family friendly policies. The EU sadly had some clout on this - so cannot see it getting any better, if you Brexit. I really feel for you, you're having a hard time, just because you've chosen to raise the next generation and work. You should be applauded and supported, not vilified. It's all wrong.

Ah but according to lots of people it's easy to get a job working from home, that pays loads, you can do without using childcare and do whatever hours you want.

I certainly never said that.

I suggested the OP could look at any possible jobs working from home because she’s already stated this would be a great option for her if she could.

im not suggesting it would be easy to get a job working from home, but more employers are becoming more flexible these days and it’s always worth having a look to see what’s out there in this area, should she decide to take the money and leave her current employer and want to continue working.

frufru27 RTFT!

Finally, i thought it was in law about parental leave? That everyone with young children have a right to it?

IT'S NOT PARENTAL LEAVE.

In yours you want there to be an offer to pay an employment lawyer. You will need probably around £500. Find out which law firm your company uses and contact them to recommend a good firm. Or go by reputation if you know someone, who has used a certain firm

This is what I had in mine. Mine was to the value of £250, although I’m in the Midlands so the going rate may be higher I’d imagine in other area of the uk.

I’m not sure where you’re based OP, but I used a firm called MFG Solicitors. They were excellent. The solicitor I had took no shit and when my employer tried to reduce the amount they were trying to pay me, my solicitor had their guts for garters and left the HR girl in tears apparently

I feel for you, it’s not your fault but it’s not your employers fault. In a perfect world you would be sahm until at least one started nursery.

Au pair seems a great idea for now. Keep looking for a childminder. Go to CAB and see what they suggest regards working and benefits.

It’s not your fault.

The thing about working from home is that it is usually a privilege that is offered after a period of time when an employee has proved themselves to be reliable.

Pretty sure an employer cannot sack you with out due process ie spoken warning followed by first written etc etc!!

No, they can't. Which is why they are not doing that.

Instead, they are offering a settlement agreement, which the OP will need to agree to, but can reject at first and ask for more money.

They can dismiss with process (fairly), or without process (unfairly - and risk a tribunal), or come to an agreement. The last of these is the most reasonable - and it's what they are going for, but they don't have to offer it at all. It's actually a very kind thing for them to do, they don't need to.

The OP was headhunted for this role, works two days a week and takes home enough to pay a nursery £1,300 and presumably live as well. So, she's obviously fairly highly paid and highly rated. She sounds like she's in an ideal position to be a consultant in some way. Hard to know as we don't know the profession. But she could consider it.

I really wouldn't use the same law firm the employer uses - to be fair, they would probably refuse to represent due to conflict of interest anyway.

Nanny saying 3 full day???

Hmm.

One of my families is 4h a week!!!

Where are u based?

“Acas were also quite helpful , they advised me not to sign anything and explained their (as an employer) and my rights - i have also started the ball rolling in the legal side and am awaiting an appointment with a solicitor specialising in employment law.”

Well done for getting that ball rolling .
Getting independent advice is the start of your taking some control of the situation.

“My manager has sent me an update via Facebook”

Even more convinced yr mngr is an arse.

Sorry to hear yr DC is so unwell.
Auntie sends cuddles.

UniversalAunt completely agree. OP, time off aside, why are the contacting you via Facebook?