13 year old wrongly accused of shoplifting Weetabix

[nojellybabies]

He went to Tesos to buy Weetabix and butter. This is what he said:

As he put the Weetabix in his bag a female employee came up to him and challenged him saying “what are you doing with that Weetabix?” She called the manager over who said “what’sgoing On?” My son (who hates having to explain himself to strangers and struggles with this sort of thing) said “did you think I was stealing it?” . She replied “yes, you have to use a basket” then moved away.

He paid at self service. As he walked out of the shop the manger called him back and there, in the lobby, in front of a crowd of bystanders took his bag and searched it then demanded the receipt for the Weetabix. Which my son produced. The manager said “sorry you can go”. Interested bystanders told him to go home and tell his family to complain.

He was seriously distraught. Several episodes of Father Ted later he is still feeling humiliated and as if everyone in town now thinks he is a criminal. Even the “my lovely horse” episode only helped a bit.:(

I’ve spoken to the general complaints line and asked the man there (who started apologising when I said the word “Weetabix”-I mean who the hell shoplifts Weetabix?) to get the shop to write to my son to apologise.

I haven’t marched down there because I don’t want to embarrass him further. I am trying to stress all the things he did right to him.

Something is surely wrong with the training here? AIBU?
And Weetabix?!? admittedly he bought some butter too but all the same...

Riddley A box of weetabix and a butter. Not difficult to carry by hand.

So why do you think he did it? It wasn’t to steal it because he did pay.

I never use baskets I always put stuff in my big reusable bag as the baskets are the same height as my boys heads and keep banging them especially there are heavy items in there.

I'm in Ireland so that might make a difference but we all put our shopping into bags while we shop, every shop, every supermarket, all the time, it's definitely a done thing. Big shop = trolley, small shop = basket /your own shopping bag. It's been this way since 2002 when the plastic bag levy came in

Riddley Because he sees his mum do it and he thinks that’s how you shop.

he should know not to take things off a supermarket shelf and put them into his bag

I saw two elderly people doing exactly this last week - piling bottles of wine into a coolbag - presumably they were going to pay for them, but I thought that if I was on security, I'd keep an eye on them.

However, I don't think your son should have been publicly humiliated OP - I'd play hell!

toddlepod

Absolutely nick I blame the parents.

I’ve reported that post toddle

Profiling at its finest! It sucks at any age. You should complain (if only for the vouchers you will receive from a contrite TESCO) But they should have just used CCTV to check he paid for the item if they were suspicious so they need to learn their lesson to prevent more kids being embarrassed in public.

“Should we all hide the bottom half of our giant weetabix in a bag now father? What is the church’s official position?”

That would be an ecumenical matter.

Not approaching people till they leave the shop is most shops policy but don't think it's law.

Yes, it is law. They have to prove intend.

This is an education. I have never heard of people not using a basket or trolley, except for when they keep it in their hands. Is it different darn saarf?

SW. We don’t even lock our back doors.

We don't stop potential shoplifters until after they've left the till to prevent such embarrassments. Quite a lot of our customers put shopping in their own bags or beneath prams and then unload at the till.

biscuitmillionaire

To those saying it's common in Ireland to put goods straight into a carrier bag before paying, I have never done this nor even seen it that I can recall (have lived all my life in Dublin). If I saw someone doing this my first thought would probably be that they were stealing.

I think this sort of thing happens a lot to teenage boys sadly. My DS has been challenged a few times.

nojellybabies
Thought you meant you'd reported y post for a minute, there! Gotcha - that was a damn rude post!

Hope your boy is feeling a bit better now! Love that you're both into Fr Ted, btw!

Since they started charging for bags, I always take a reusable hessian one and put shopping straight in, rather than bothering with a basket as well as carrying the reusable bag. I thought most people did now!

Thanks lazyarse123

What kind of bag do you mean OP? If you mean a backpack or similar with other stuff in it how would the shop know that he had taken everything out and paid for it? People do shoplift which makes it unpleasant for the rest of us sometimes, not giving them any room to doubt, by using a basket or holding stuff in his hands would have saved him from this unpleasant experience.

I like the Irish way! Far cleaner and easier too. Baskets are a nightmare to carry (dig in to my arthritic fingers) and you can't fit much in.
Sadly I think teenage boys are generally viewed with suspicion. My 2 were followed home by the Police a few nights ago. They had been walking the dog down country lanes at 10pm ( I'd been nagging them to take him out since 7.30pm) and the police asked their names/ where they were going/what they were doing/ where they lived. Then followed them in a van at walking speed for half a mile.

Mind blown by this thread, literally NEVER seen anyone put stuff into their own bag before paying.
I live in London and I think I would assume that everyone was shoplifting if they did this. I mean, how do you tell who actually IS shoplifting otherwise? Genuine question.

As PP have said it is difficult to carry a large bag and a basket and have a spare hand to take things off the shelves. If you only have one thing to get I agree that you could just hold it but how do you then pick up another thing as both your hands are being used?

Just to note, shop staff/security have only common law powers nothing extra. They have no right/power to search you, only to restrain you until the police arrive if they have reasonable suspicion. The restraint must be reasonable and proportionate i.e. if you are not running away/aggressive they shouldn't be touching you. They have no right/power to take you to an office or interview you.

Even the police need resonable suspicion to "stop and search" you.

I hope your DS is feeling better now. Discrimination always hurts. He shouldn't have to use a basket just because he is a teenage boy, to prove he is not shoplifting.